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does anyone else feel like?

yougeekay

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 26, 2009
Messages
201
so the only psycs ive taken are shrooms an acid, but ive done a looot of both.

now i know that they are ego dissovling substances, but does anyone else feel like psycadelics reinforce your ego? i cant really explain exactly what i mean but ill try an break it down.. im not trying to say that i become egotistical, but i feel likes trips reinforce my self esteem. when i trip, i dont really feel like my ego is slipping away, its more like an enhancement, as if everything i enjoy, or love, becomes so valid and that kind of thinking makes me feel euphoric. i wish i could explain it better.

also i never seem to lose it, or get delusional, even on super high dose trips i never feel uncomfortable, in fact it seems like the higher the dose, the more serene my trips are an it seems like things make even more sense. an i can do just about anything while tripping an not tweak out.
 
Nope, can't say that I've had that experience besides on lower non-psychedelic, or just barely psychedelic doses. When I'm done tripping I usually feel as though I am more self confident, but sometimes it seems to go the other way. Are you sure you're not just getting weak LSD and heat dried shrooms? Either way, I'm glad your enjoying the experiences.
 
I would agree that psychedelics re-enforce parts of the self; the ego, not so much, as its a lot harder to lie to yourself after being bereft of that structure....but when you cannot lie to yourself any more, then you can be really confident that you are doing the right thing, and when.

Personally, I'd say that people who get delusional on psychedelics are possibly already delusional (i point a finger at me and say this...). However, the delusions and the breaking of them often leads to a serenity unparelled, and one that is hard to shake.

That said, I find that I have a lot of extremely "bipolar" traits, and people do agree there. Its more like feeling the bads as badder and feeling the goods as abso-fucking-lutely amazing then polarised moods though.

OP, I would suggest (if you wanna get your feet wet in the ego-death pond) that you try something like DMT, DPT or even salvia. Once the ego melts during one experience, it seems more likely that it CAN happen again.

Also, there is a difference between the SELF and the EGO: the ego is part of the self, that is usually somewhat blind to the rest of the self's perceptions...And things like self-esteem and self-confidence are great, and rewarding, and moreso when they are not based on egoic delusions. People, such as Tiger Woods (weird example) seem to have self confidence etc. based purely on the whispers of the ego....
 
oh i wasnt saying i want to experience ego death, but you are right, when you no longer lie to yourself its easy to believe what your doing is right, so thats why i feel more confident, or its not even confidence, more like well being or piece of mind.

and ive experienced some mild form of ego death but def not full blown, but i dont need to in order to undertand the message. if it does happen one day though, i wont mind :). oh and im 100% positive its good acid and shrooms, cause i mean im not saying i dont totally tweak the fuck out haha, i just still seem to have control.

i think what it is for me, Ego Death seems to be the defining awe moment for most people on psycs, but since they are mind manifesting, maybe some people such as myself have a different kind of 'moment' due to the way i think. maybe if so many people didnt have the idea of ego death in their head beforehand, their moment would be slightly different too.
 
maybe if so many people didnt have the idea of ego death in their head beforehand, their moment would be slightly different too.

Thats true. An epiphany strikes everyone differently I guess.

That said, if we were to break ego-death down into its basics: loss of self-awareness, loss of awareness of space and time; these may manifest as not knowing your own name, not knowing that not knowing your own name is kinda strange, and not knowing that you don't actually not-know something (fuck, that just burnt out a few brain cells)....to which I would say- the guys on ketamine- then, ego death is very recognisable and very much beneficial. Everyone needs a break from themselves; depoending how will you can remake yourself determines how drastically your life will change.

I was unprepared for my first encounter, and I was fucked for a long time afterwards. I've been on to experience it several more times, and have generally found it to be rewarding and beneficial.

Ego death has also got me into big trouble; there's not much about it thats objectively different to psychosis, particualrly if you are one to get stimulated by subjective internal death sensations...Me and LSD probably shoudln't butt horns again, I tend to go bonkers in a very bad way on it, and anything that whacks my dopamine receptors....
 
I've never had ego death on a phen, but I've taken more than one very hard look at myself under the influence of mescaline. It made me feel like yeah, I've got problems like anyone, but inside at the core I'm really OK.

During one trip I was meditating, and I saw my psyche floating in a reinforced container in a stormy sea. I understood it to mean that mentally I can deal with whatever's coming. I felt like I was looking at myself in a safe place.

I haven't felt that way since I lost someone very close a few years ago. I had gone pretty much psychotic and became really self destructive. Mesc pulled me out of a tailspin. I was so locked into a negative frame of mind that even almost getting killed didn't phase me. It took something drastic, and even though I had sworn off psychs for a while because I know they don't usually mix with that state of mind, stories from Peru convinced me to turn to San Pedro. I'm still healing but I've restored my relationships with people near me and I'm actually enjoying being alive again.

So yeah, I feel reinforced :)
 
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