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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

doctor is not fair

jayjaysleepyhead

jayjaysleepyhead

Bluelighter
Joined
May 28, 2016
Messages
227
Hi firstly i hope i can ask this on this forum as im sick of getting cut off so can my question at least be moved not stopped as i believe itd pretty harmless. Ok i agreed with my doctor to come down 2 mg of diazepam a month i was on 20 mg , i also stated thst if it was too harsh i would like to stop she agreed then behind my back she approached the head dr told him a bundle of lies that i was being aggressive etc, so my next appointment i met this new dr an apparent expert on benzos i was on 16 mg now a day in no other words he told me i dont want to see you every week pick up your prescription from reception you will be dettoxed to zero but at the rate you asked which i didnt i was told 2 mg a month never asked so i had to agree now 6 months later ive never seen him im on 4 mg and struggling i want to go back up to about 15 daily he refuses to see me , i signed no agreement and was promised i could stop at any dosage i wanted so basically they want me off them . What can i do no one believes me if i could top up i would but i cant benzos are so hard to come by in britain at the mo . What do i do
 
Hi Jay, you're not alone. I think many doctors nowadays are reluctant to prescribe benzos period and I live in the U.S. Sometimes you can try and see another doctor but not sure if that would work for you. Example: I went to a new psych and told her I had previously been given Abilify and showed her the bottle from last year. She pulled me up on her computer and asked me "what about the citalopram?" (My GP had given this to me in January) I explained that I did not mention that because it wasn't working for me and I'm not taking it. So this woman gave me an attitude like I was trying to pull something over on her. So sometimes they think they know what's best for you even when you know what actually helps. Doctors can be seem unfair like this because, well they can. :(
 
PM drs are good for doing shit like that too. They like to tell you what works best for you or what your pain should be feeling like. They act like gods that know what is going on inside of your body and what it feels like. Mine also acts like he's never heard of tolerance. After 3 years on the same dosage, I was in tears trying to tell him that they weren't working as well and he refused to even hear me out and said that if he raised my dose it wouldn't work anyway but proceeded to prescribe me a regimen of benzos (which I fill but don't take ) I finally had to tell him that I was having allergic reactions to the morphine I was taking so that he would at least switch me to something different. He switched me from morph 30s ir to oxy 30s ir. I almost wonder how the hell he made it through med school.
 
DeeDeeDrug said:
PM drs are good for doing shit like that too. They like to tell you what works best for you or what your pain should be feeling like. They act like gods that know what is going on inside of your body and what it feels like. Mine also acts like he's never heard of tolerance. After 3 years on the same dosage, I was in tears trying to tell him that they weren't working as well and he refused to even hear me out and said that if he raised my dose it wouldn't work anyway but proceeded to prescribe me a regimen of benzos (which I fill but don't take ) I finally had to tell him that I was having allergic reactions to the morphine I was taking so that he would at least switch me to something different. He switched me from morph 30s ir to oxy 30s ir. I almost wonder how the hell he made it through med school.
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I hear ya on the PM docs. I see a PM practice that has several docs, the main one and his PA. I must say the PA is a lot nicer, more down to earth and compassionate, and has a good understanding of tolerance and the fact that mine builds rapidly. HE is the one who is more willing to adjust medication at a reasonable rate and seems to understand my need to keep up with tolerance.

The main doc however seems to be the polar opposite. He's very strict, hard nosed, basically ignores my need to keep up with my tolerance, is very impersonal, and has tried to push non narc meds on me that I have had pretty bad side effects from. Needless to say I try to always see the PA as good ole do just irks me and is a hassle to deal with.

Living with chronic pain is hard enough but when you have a tight wad for a doc it's a real PITA. Be thankful that you got IR 30s though. My PM doc when I lived in Vegas wouldn't script oxy with a ten foot poll with the exception of Percocets citing the excuse that oxy was the most abused pain med. They would hand out Opana, MS Contin, Fent patches, but no oxy.
 
I just posted a response to a similar dilemma so I won't go into a lengthy one here. Bottom line is you have to trust your doctor as much if not MORE than he/she needs to trust you. After all it is your body. It took me 3 psych doctors before I found one that I can trust and be fully open and honest with. As long as you aren't simply drug seeking there is nothing wrong with changing doctors and you should do just that. The doctor patient TRUST relationship is the only way to any effective therapy. There are many bad arrogant doctors out there especially in the mental health field but I promise there are also some who truly care about their patients. You need to go find that one.
 
It's your right to pick a Dr that you get along with and they made an oath to keep people comfortable and to the best of their ability. But if you are drug seeking they also have a duty to protect you from yourself.

The best pain Dr I found was at a university teaching hospital. He was constantly doing studies and learning about the most recent studies. Right off the bat he said everyone is different in how pain meds act and some need more. He asked what my current dose was which was high, and when I took it. He then did tests to see how it was effecting me and tested reflexes and eye movement. He then said he saw no reason not to be on the dose and I could safely go up as I was no longer getting pain relief.

The best way to get a Dr to trust you is to be open to their suggestions. Take what they tell you and give it a couple days. If it isn't working call them and leave a msg and let them make changes. If you can't afford a medicine call and let them know it's too expensive or your insurance won't pay for it. Many times they can get the insurance to pay or figure something out or will change to something else. Your Dr is there to work for you and have the staff for that. If something is not going right no matter what it is, call and tell them. If you keep them in the loop they will tend to trust you more and even work harder to get you comfortable. If they don't know there is an issue there is nothing they can do.
 
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My Dr doesn't work that way. I've been open and honest with him from day one. He lowered my meds on my first visit saying that he wouldn't hurt me and would keep me comfortable. Then he proceeded to do just the opposite. I did everything he said would be to my benefit. When I told him that he WAS hurting me and that the dose he had me on was not even touching my pain, he just says "oh come on, it's not that bad!" He had me in tears. I'm stuck because I'm in Florida and there are very few pain drs that will even accept new patients and if you can, the first thing they do is start screwing with what was working for you. My Dr cut my meds by 2/3 with in the first two visits. I dealt with it for the first YEAR! I told him that I was in excruciating pain every visit because of this and for all of my honesty, all I got was yelled at. He would tell me that even if he adjusted my dosage, it wouldn't help me. Instead he started prescribing me benzos, muscle relaxers, gaba. He even went so far as to say that depression was making my pain worse. I said that if I am depressed it's BECAUSE of the pain! He treats me like I couldn't possibly know what works for my own pain. I just don't know what else to do. And then if you can get what does work for you, the next hurdle is finding a pharmacy that has/or will fill your scripts.
I used to kind of look forward to that time of the month, but now I get so anxious that my blood pressure goes through the roof. I've told him that I'm so nervous to tell him when I have a problem because he doesn't seem to listen, understand or care and he acts like he knows I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place so I just have to go along with what he says. This shit with the DEA is a jumbled mess. Why is nothing being done?
 
Crack'r said:
It's your right to pick a Dr that you get along with and they made an oath to keep people comfortable and to the best of their ability. But if you are drug seeking they also have a duty to protect you from yourself.

The best pain Dr I found was at a university teaching hospital. He was constantly doing studies and learning about the most recent studies. Right off the bat he said everyone is different in how pain meds act and some need more. He asked what my current dose was which was high, and when I took it. He then did tests to see how it was effecting me and tested reflexes and eye movement. He then said he saw no reason not to be on the dose and I could safely go up as I was no longer getting pain relief.

The best way to get a Dr to trust you is to be open to their suggestions. Take what they tell you and give it a couple days. If it isn't working call them and leave a msg and let them make changes. If you can't afford a medicine call and let them know it's too expensive or your insurance won't pay for it. Many times they can get the insurance to pay or figure something out or will change to something else. Your Dr is there to work for you and have the staff for that. If something is not going right no matter what it is, call and tell them. If you keep them in the loop they will tend to trust you more and even work harder to get you comfortable. If they don't know there is an issue there is nothing they can do.
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This is good advice and I would like to add one more thing to it. People (myself included) can get fixated on their condition or what they THINK their condition is and spend massive amounts of time researching and educating them self. This leads us to start to consider ourselves experts in both medicine and treatment. This is sometimes referred to as "white coat syndrome". The later "symptoms" of this are attempting to manipulate medical professionals and forming your own self approved medication treatment.

It took me several months before I sat down with a doctor and admitted to him I didn't know what the fuck I was doing and needed his help. This takes humility and a understanding that research and anecdotal experience does not certify you with a MD.
 
DeeDeeDrug said:
My Dr doesn't work that way. I've been open and honest with him from day one. He lowered my meds on my first visit saying that he wouldn't hurt me and would keep me comfortable. Then he proceeded to do just the opposite. I did everything he said would be to my benefit. When I told him that he WAS hurting me and that the dose he had me on was not even touching my pain, he just says "oh come on, it's not that bad!" He had me in tears. I'm stuck because I'm in Florida and there are very few pain drs that will even accept new patients and if you can, the first thing they do is start screwing with what was working for you. My Dr cut my meds by 2/3 with in the first two visits. I dealt with it for the first YEAR! I told him that I was in excruciating pain every visit because of this and for all of my honesty, all I got was yelled at. He would tell me that even if he adjusted my dosage, it wouldn't help me. Instead he started prescribing me benzos, muscle relaxers, gaba. He even went so far as to say that depression was making my pain worse. I said that if I am depressed it's BECAUSE of the pain! He treats me like I couldn't possibly know what works for my own pain. I just don't know what else to do. And then if you can get what does work for you, the next hurdle is finding a pharmacy that has/or will fill your scripts.
I used to kind of look forward to that time of the month, but now I get so anxious that my blood pressure goes through the roof. I've told him that I'm so nervous to tell him when I have a problem because he doesn't seem to listen, understand or care and he acts like he knows I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place so I just have to go along with what he says. This shit with the DEA is a jumbled mess. Why is nothing being done?
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This is a shame and I can only imagine your frustration. This came about (especially in Florida) because of the pill mills and dramatic increase of opiate abuse across America leaving patients like yourself paying for the sins of abusers and addicts. Truth is the addicts are the victims too, as corrupt doctors and big pharma were giving this stuff out like candy. Now the entire system is a mess for everyone involved. The focus of the government funds needs to be poured into treatment programs and education instead of billions of dollars on the losing "war" on drugs. I hate to say it deedeedrug but it will likely only get harder and harder for you to obtain your medication as the DEA transfers more and more focus on regulating and prosecuting doctors giving these pain medications out. It doesn't help when the news is constantly consumed by yet another dead celebrity who OD'd on opiates. You are caught in the middle and I hope you can find a way to get by until some major changes take place within the government and God only knows when that will take place.
 
I'm in Florida too. PM your location or I can give you a name. Don't know if the swamp is too far to travel?

Getting a Rx filled can be a hassle as they do normally treat you like a drug addict. I kept moving until I found a pharmacist that treated me like a person. I also always tried to make small talk and eventually brought my daughter by to say hi every time we were there and saw her working. She ended up retiring but I had such I long history all the new people are decent and at least don't give me a hard time. They also recognized how much meds I was getting and made sure to always order enough just for me on top of what they normally got. I think there was only one time they didn't have enough and even then they gave me a partial fill and got the rest a few days later, which from what I understand is not legal. This was also a Publix in an affluent part of town. Don't know if that helped.

Even if you aren't close by, I have family all over, many who are older and see pain docs. So I might still be able to recommend a name.

Good luck!
 
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DeeDeeDrug said:
My Dr doesn't work that way. I've been open and honest with him from day one. He lowered my meds on my first visit saying that he wouldn't hurt me and would keep me comfortable. Then he proceeded to do just the opposite. I did everything he said would be to my benefit. When I told him that he WAS hurting me and that the dose he had me on was not even touching my pain, he just says "oh come on, it's not that bad!" He had me in tears. I'm stuck because I'm in Florida and there are very few pain drs that will even accept new patients and if you can, the first thing they do is start screwing with what was working for you. My Dr cut my meds by 2/3 with in the first two visits. I dealt with it for the first YEAR! I told him that I was in excruciating pain every visit because of this and for all of my honesty, all I got was yelled at. He would tell me that even if he adjusted my dosage, it wouldn't help me. Instead he started prescribing me benzos, muscle relaxers, gaba. He even went so far as to say that depression was making my pain worse. I said that if I am depressed it's BECAUSE of the pain! He treats me like I couldn't possibly know what works for my own pain. I just don't know what else to do. And then if you can get what does work for you, the next hurdle is finding a pharmacy that has/or will fill your scripts.
I used to kind of look forward to that time of the month, but now I get so anxious that my blood pressure goes through the roof. I've told him that I'm so nervous to tell him when I have a problem because he doesn't seem to listen, understand or care and he acts like he knows I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place so I just have to go along with what he says. This shit with the DEA is a jumbled mess. Why is nothing being done?
Click to expand...
Your doc sounds like a real lid.
 
Go to a different doctor.

I had tons of trouble with shrinks wanting me to take antipsychotics if I wanted to stay on benzos so I went to my primary doctor and he was like ok I will give you some and up it, anything else?
 
^ that is a good point. Many Dr will continue what you're on. Many pain docs spend half there time getting people off and the other half controlling pain so they might be predisposed to wanting to get people down. Sounds better than get people off.

I get my pain meds from a hematolgist/oncologist but they are used to trying to control pain in terminal cancer patients and more used to higher doses.
 
I do want to go to another Dr but even if I can find one in my area, they're not taking new patients. The way I got in to the dr I'm at now is because my dad is a patient of his. I've got to have surgery and the nearest surgeons who take my insurance are almost 100 miles away from where I live.
The thing that gets me is that this same Dr prescribes my dad 270 methadone and 120 percs a month. He pretty much goes in there and tells him what he wants. My dad thinks he's doing this to me because I'm female because he knows a few other guys who get prescribed like that too.
The dr will actually tell me, well, if you don't like it, go find another dr. He knows I can't. I get the feeling that he just doesn't like me.
 
How about your dad accompanying you to your next appointment as a support person (and being a family member receiving good treatment from the doctor). Just a thought ... take care.
 
:\ Just to "second" rainyday's motion...Perhaps you need your dad at your side for appointments.

I am fiercely independent. However, my PM doctor's culture has no respect for women. He was so batshit crazy towards me in the beginning, my nerves went berserk. The SHINGLES virus activated in my eye/face and remained in acute levels for over a year. The fucker had the nerve to tell me, upon seeing my face, that this virus is known to cause many suicides!

I'd still like to rip off his head and shit down his throat. Um-m-m, I can't though...shit, that is...due to constipation exacerbated to the level of partial obstruction.

My husband started leaving the office to accompany me to appointments. It's a shame, but true. The doctor's demeanor is 180 with a man present.

I hope you find answers.
 
There are plenty of docs taking new patients. They may not be pain docs but they can prescribe Rx just the same. Do you have insurance? Then you do have the right to second, third, fourth opinions. Especially if you need surgery.

Be proactive.

And another family member probably does help. My dad has gone to many Dr appt with me and brought things up, like my pain. I think it definitely helped me get and keep my pain meds being a young 20s male. That was a decade ago now.
 
The fact of the matter is that a lot of them do not take any special training in PM, except the anesthesiologists. A lot of the others take a short, sometimes internet course, where they learn to file the paperwork, and put up a shingle, because they are so few and far between, PM is a real moneymaker. I went to clinic one time, and this fatass neurologist stood at the desk saying hey, he'd gotten a real patient, instead of the PM types. That is the general attitude, unless they have some kind of calling towards treating pain and actually finding out about it. I think chronic pain is a brain issue in many ways, and as more research is done into the brain, we'll have some actual answers. Boy, it'll piss off some of them to know we are not just drug seekers and whiners like they've treated us for years. God bless you and good luck.
 
Funny you use the word seeker as my new shrink/Dr says im classed as a benzi seeker as i will go ti any level to get
them
 
Talk about unfair! Ok so I had just spend the last two years in prison literally, and before i went to prison,I was receiving klonopin, adderall and tramadol for about 5years from my family doctor. Ok so last month (right after I got released ) I went back to my family doctor for a follow up and my refills, as I said I was still getting my scripts while I was in jail...bad news for me is my family doctor retired, so this new guy took over..pretty cool doctor...he continued all my scripts EXCEPT klonopin 2mg daily, as his excuse was that if i got adhd like I say, then the adderall should kill my anxiety, and if it's anxiety, then the adderall will make it worse. Point is doctor's or cracking down. ..I could of easily dropped my adderall for the klonopin but I prefer my adderalls . He did say if my anxiety is worse then to call him. ..but I'm not trying to gamble right now. I feel you though man, it sucks
 
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