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do you remember what it's like?

Mellabopper

Mellabopper

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 16, 2000
Messages
3,811
Location
Boston
to have hope?
feeling?
to care?
i dont think i do.
and the only solution i can think of
is to turn around and walk away.
without giving much of a fight
i'm tired of fighting.
i'm tired of caring
i'm sick of taking care of others
and not even being appreciated.
i'm tired of people taking advantage
of my willingness to help.
so fuck it.
fuck it all
i cant do anything right anymore
except yell and scream and shout in rage
because as of late
all of my days
and nights
are only filled with rage.
and soon enough that rage dies
and leaves me with nothing.
apathy.
nihilism, even?
i break down bridges
and dont even seem to care
i do care
i really really do
but i just dont know how to fix things
so being tired of everything
the only thing left to do
is turn
and walk away
alone.
pathetic and weak, yes,
but that is what i have become.
Mellabopper
11-10-01
 
melissa,
you are only as pathetic and weak as your mind lets yourself be. mind over matter, girl!
you'll be a'ight.
and if not.. myself and duo dos will come up to boston.. or wait until you get back home to Saint Louis (which is only like 250 miles from us) and give ya an ass-whoopin Shady Duo style.
biggrin.gif

sorry for the silliness.
*ahem*
this was a fine piece of writing.
dave
 
This one I can really relate with personally. Nice one Mella!
smile.gif

------------------
"How the fuck do you feellllll?"
AIM ~ FutureAeons
 
Mella, mella, mella
You are not in the least bit pathetic and weak. Smart and sweet, yeah. Pathetic and weak, no.
Chin up, young lady, because you've been through many a storm and you know there are brighter days ahead.
And plus...I don't need apathetic, pathetic, and weak person in the dynamic duo. That'd mean I'd have to work. And you KNOW what my relationship with work is like
wink.gif

It's a great piece of writing, but I say boooo to you feelin' that way. Boo, I say, boo!
Signed,
some guy
 
How is it that a person I don't even know can write MY feelings? Maybe because your not the only one in this boat... grab a paddle babe, we'll make it to land yet.
Land Ho!
------------------
Christian
AIM: TChristianW
"The sharpness of memories fade, but never the tone." --ebow
 
mella- i'm over here, my eyes are swelled. This poem refelcted so much of how i feel right now, the last few days, weeks...maybe months...
so many days i want to just drop everything and start walking, walking away from everything because i am tired of caring way to much. i tire myself out and forget about myself, who i am. In reality thats not what i want, and thats not what i can do. Thanks for sharing this...
much love and light,
ange
 
People always say that running away is weak,..selfish. But you know what sometimes walking away from everything for a little bit helps make a person into the person that they want to be. Everybody needs time on their own, for self discovery, some soul searching, self realization. Keep your head life will turn around someday.
------------------
before love there are
memories of innonence.
after there are none...
 
i hear ya mella.
in fact, and this is no word of a lie, this piece hit home so hard that i actually bawled tonight when i read it. i feel exactly the same way, and its like, tonight i just lost it, at work, at home, in my car. just broke down and lost it.
and no one gives a shit.
that's life.
but hey, i luv ya.
~~~chrissy~~~
 
Two quotes come to my mind, one from A Bronx Tale, the second from Jim Valvano:
"Nobody cares."
"Don't gve up, don't EVER give up."
I think you can guess which one I like better.
smile.gif

{{{Mella-ciggy}}}
 
i know how you feel. :/
at least you can put it into words, that always seems to help. at least, i know it helps me.
nice poem.
------------------
~poe
"we're fools whether we dance or not,so we might as well dance."
 
hang in there mella - - life can be extremely frusterating and depressing, but things will get better, they just take time. You are a strong person.
((hugs))
anne
 
I have felt like that so many times. And who am i, or who is anyone to tell you not to feel like that? It's all a matter of your own perception. Sometimes you have to hurt and feel bad, to make things better. But no matter what you do, just remember people love you and there will be better days, and that feeling may become nothing more than a forgotten memory.
"i'm sick of taking care of others
and not even being appreciated.
i'm tired of people taking advantage
of my willingness to help."... So damn true.
I hope you feel better. I like this poem
smile.gif

plurr
Raychul
Don't know if u thought about it, but after i like cry (like a really hard cry) I don't feel as bad. I wonder why that is?
 
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