Deleted member 175441
Bluelighter
what is thought?
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Do you over think?
- Thread starter Survival0200
- Start date
^ Nice one!
I'm of two thoughts on this. Over-analysis can of course be detrimental, but I don't think that there is such a thing as over-thought. Especially when it comes to considering our own motives. However, there is the danger of falling into Distorted Thinking patterns, which is a common pitfall. I know that I need to constantly remind myself about personalization and shoulds in particular.
I'm of two thoughts on this. Over-analysis can of course be detrimental, but I don't think that there is such a thing as over-thought. Especially when it comes to considering our own motives. However, there is the danger of falling into Distorted Thinking patterns, which is a common pitfall. I know that I need to constantly remind myself about personalization and shoulds in particular.
shady4091
Bluelighter
Personally I think my problem is under-thinking...
fivelinefury
Bluelighter
^ Distorted Thinking Patterns ... Yep that's me ... That's a better name for it ...
Survival0200
Bluelighter
I have a tendency of paranoid thinking. This morning I said "Morning, Joe!" to a pal I know. He didn't reply, so I started thinking if he has something against me - and then I wondered if he heard me wrong: me calling him "Moron, Joe!" ...
TheMiddleWay
Bluelighter
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- Nov 5, 2011
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- 114
I've had friends who think this way. You should have just smiled and said "good morning, Joe" more loudly. It's very likely joe didn't hear you, even if he did, adding good to morning would maker it clear to him what was said, and reassure yourself that there was no misunderstanding. That requires a bit of over thinking, it's best just to have the confidence to assume he just didn't heart you, the most likely scenario.
I would call over thinking and over analysis the same thing in the context being discussed, can you elaborate. No matter what either are bad when it turns into a circular thought pattern. Questioning your own motives is less likely to be detrimental.
I do this a lot. I've never been to a therapist and I've never been on any medication. I've been addicted to drugs and I continue to abuse them, but in a much more functional manner than when I was addicted. I have problems with self confidence, but this issue has become less severe as I am growing older (I am 23).
The only advice I can give you is to follow your heart and interact with people who you are really comfortable with. I found that I tend to over-analyze things because I suppress certain feelings and thoughts due to my desire to please people and avoid confrontations. This is a very bad habit. Be honest with yourself and only be around people who are not going to bothered by the things you say. They are definitely out there. Everyone else: they can go fuck themselves.
first part of it sounds like kind of like me (23 too :-D ). I don't mind arguing points and more friendly confrontation but will surely avoid aggressive arguments.
Do not limit yourself to only speaking with people you are comfortable with, use these people as a comfort zone to build confidence for interactions with people you are less comfortable with. Who are they and what is definitely out there?
Methadone84
Bluelighter
i under think
lol
lol
AndroidsDreamofBTC
Bluelight Crew
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- 3,553
Your right, there is no need to limit yourself to your comfort zone.
I guess what I really meant to say is don't put in any emotional investment unless you are really comfortable with a person. For me it's important to control the emotional aspect of my personality and not let it get in the way of achieving my own aims.
TheMiddleWay
Bluelighter
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- 114
I agree, but I have a, feeling that most if the people's problems who are posting is putting too much of an emotional investment into people they don't feel secure around which is what lads to the over thinking. They fret about their self image in the eyes off people they probably should worry less about.
As you mentioned, I think managing emotions is a skill that needs some sharpening to help with these over bearing thoughts. By being insecure with ones self, people sabotage their chance to make an impact in a situation.
For example:
If you worry about your self-worth as an employee, you might not ask for a raise when you are indeed an essentialeither with great skills.
An area I need work is with women in the relationship department. This seems more common of a problem across both sexes. I just try and remind myself that if they feel the same way about me, than it is likely they are having the same thoughts and won't be bothered by a more forward approach; if they don't, than it's not a big deal anyway.
I just gave that normal fear if being shot down, and it seems to be a common one, but still irrational. I can talk to any one with ease, but I'll freeze up if I am asking for a date ect.
I just need to suck it up, and get back to school do I can have some smart women catch my fancy and go for it. Oh, and a job,.... I really don't need to ask for my mom to pay for a date, though I'm certain she'd oblige. Atleast I know if any girl will get into my messy car she must be down enough to forgive any awkward moments.
