Disso abuse causing schizophrenic-like thoughts?

[Bluuberry]

Is it a thing for too much dissociative use to cause one to have intense paranoid delusions? I thought the 3-meo-pcp was making me see everything so clearly but now I feel like I'm in a hall of mirrors. None of my friends can convince me that it's all ok. What the fuck is going on? Has anyone been here before? I have a sturdy mind but everything has been crumbling lately. I was on a marshmallow cloud in heaven and was celebrating that I was winning at life, and then I woke up in a state of emergency that hasn't stopped for 2 days. Disaster feels around the corner. Is it all in my head?! I can't convince myself that it's okay, don't know what the fuck to do. I want to run and hide but I don't have the resources so I'm stuck waiting for the impending doom to either happen or not happen and this purgatory is worse than anything. Advice? Suggestions? Criticism? I told myself I wouldn't take any more but then I decided I was already in too deep so it didn't matter. I don't think I'm making sane conclusions anymore. Is this a thing that happens from too much dissociated fun or am I actually losing it?

 

[Mazzy in Europe]

Hey Blueberry, yes, it is a thing and you are not alone.
Dissociatives can really fuck with your mental health. You really should put a stop to any further use and you will most probably make a full recovery. It is not too late, so don't use that as an excuse to keep using as your mental health is too precious to risk.

Just to illustrate, I would like to tell you a bit about my experience.

When it was legally available in 2011, I was a huge fan of the dissociative MXE and abused it heavily on a daily basis for many months. I was totally reckless. Eventually I developed serious mental problems, imagining all kinds of strange things that were untrue and becoming extremely emotionally unstable. I ended up in a psychiatric institution suffering from drug-induced psychosis and schizophrenia.
Fortunately I made a full recovery and would never go near dissociatives again.

My suggestion to you is stop using immediately, don't panic, your mind is playing tricks on you and it will most likely soon pass and you will be fine. if you have only been using for a short time you will probably soon make a complete recovery. In the meantime, keep yourself comfortable and find a way to relax.

If the symptoms worsen or become too unbearable then you need medical help, and I can assure you that the right medication will stop your unpleasant symptoms almost immediately.

How long have you been using and how much have you been taking? That is going to be the decisive factor.

 

[Bluuberry]

I used MXE most days for 2 years almost but it never made me feel insane, only mentally "retarded" for lack of better words, at times. The 3-meo-pcp, for the last 2 months every day (switched over from MXE), at what would be considered higher than normal dose. I am already starting to feel better with the help of some kratom and good food. I think I just need to calm down and stay away from the dissos for a while. I can't imagine a life without them as a crutch but I understand logically that daily use is a 100% recipe for physical and mental health problems. Yet, even knowing this, I want to take them every day. I don't know how to deal with it, nothing else comes close to the feeling of a good disso. Life without the bubble of dissos and alcohol and benzos is so insanely depressing. My actual life is great, most people would love to be in my position, but I'm so upset with the state of the world that I have a hard time enjoying it. If anyone knew what I what I know about what's happening to us as a species on a global scale, I think they would feel the same as me or worse. Anytime I even dip into the topics that are bothering me, the person I'm talking to realizes I'm speaking the truth and gets super bummed out. I just can't ignore what's really going on anymore, it makes me sick that I ever sought to and I feel like I would rather live a shorter life and fight the good fight than to live in a false reality and pretend we're going to be ok if we continue this course as a planet.

Some things are more fun highs but I can't do normal stuff, on 3-meo I could do anything, some things better than sober. I'm not going to seek medical help and the only meds I'm willing to use are herbs, and benzos since I'm already dependent on them. Thank you for reassuring me that it's just my mind playing tricks on me.. I felt like this once on MXE after a traumatic incident compounded the issue, it went away eventually. I was just hoping that it was a temporary effect of this class of compounds, seems like the case. I've never had problems with MXE or K or but I suppose this is a whole different beast. I have felt like this from amphetamine when I was a young lad.. Now that I recall, it was even worse then, and I came back just fine shortly after.. Thanks for the reminder. I will detox however possible, I'm open to suggestions. I'm somewhat new to dissos and am not sure what I need to supplement after such an insanely long bender, besides magnesium, electrolytes, and general healthy foods.

 

[herbavore]

Make it your mission to do everything possible to create a healthy body--good diet, good sleep habits, EXERCISE, and exposure to nature. You've put your brain through a lot and it will take time to reset but it will--it's an incredible organ! Your mind is another thing altogether. Find ways to observe your thoughts and feelings almost like an outsider--a trusted friend observing your thinking and feelings to determine what you need to regain calm and strength. Then be that trusted friend. Sometimes getting so divided from your self can be so disorienting that it is hard to know where to start. Patience and observation will be great learning tools.

 

[Mazzy in Europe]

I was heavily addicted to MXE, taking up to a gram a day, every day.

BTW, I have read many reports of bad experiences from 3-meo-PCP on various forums. It seems there is a fine line between an enjoyable dose and a very unpleasant one. Also people who take it for just a few days in a row without a break can experience distressing side effects, so after taking it every day for 2 months you should consider yourself lucky to have escaped with your sanity!

I needed anti-psychotics after my MXE addiction, but your recovery plan sounds good. I would include excercise, omega 3 oil and plenty of brain-healing foods like fish, walnuts and blueberries - these can actually repair damage and rejuvenate neurones.

It goes without saying that you should embark on a long period of abstinence from dissociatives, rediscover other ways to enhance your life experience and only ever use disso's occasionally.

You don't want to end up going crazy like I did!

Best of luck to you and congratulations for making the wise decision to detox.