Detox: The hardest part.

dreib

Greenlighter
Joined
Jun 24, 2009
Messages
45
So here I go again another detox from opiates. Ive got my meds lined up, clonidine, antivan and imoddium. But what i dont have really is the ideal place or the time. I work full time and have a family and being sick for 3-5 days at home isnt easy, not to mention the paws that follow.

So here's my question: Whats the hardest part for you aside from the physical part? I guess im posting this question just so i have something to read later.

I start tomorrow night. Wish me luck.
 
The hardest part for me is overcoming the ritual associated with acquiring, preparing, and ingesting it.. You develop a certain affinity for the love/pain associated with opiates.. Like a girlfriend or something.. This is besides the physical symptoms, of course..
 
The hardest part of detox/withdrawal is the PAWS ( Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome) You need too learn to fix the root of the the problem that caused the addiction in the first place. Counseling, rehab, bluelight are all great tools. I am day 8 off of methadone, have small stash of suboxone soma and benzos. It is do-able. You can do it !
 
I just wish i could runaway for a week and get it over with. Like a lot of people i get two days in and cave because i have shit i have to get done,wether its work or family obligations, i can never seem to get over the hump.

I have to break the cycle. Rehab is not an option at this point but im for sure going to get into counseling.
 
If you cannot take time off work, I would suggest taking your last dose thursday night, then work thru day 1 of the withdrawals (Friday), then Sunday should be the worst day, and by Monday you'll still be a bit sick but should definitely be improving and over the hump. You can just tell your family/co-workers your got the flu or something.

But immodium, clonidine, and ativan should all help you greatly. Search for threads regarding Loperamide (the ingredient in immodium) as high doses can greatly reduce withdrawal symptoms. But be careful mixing clonidine with ativan, as respiratory depression can occur.
 
I've been on Bupe for about 7 years now and I still have about another 6 months of tapering (at least) before I'm off. I think the worst part will be not taking a pill anymore. For the past 7 years I have taken a pill a few times a day that has helped me tremendously with the whole addiction thing, but has also helped me battle depression, anxiety, and minor pain. Not having that little pill in my pocket, at my disposal, will be the hardest thing to deal with.

I am mad at myself for letting this take so long, almost 25% of my life (I'm 28) has been on Bupe. Sad really.. At least I can say my life turned 180 degrees and have been working full time and been productive for those 7 years.. but it still will be hard. I kind of wish I had a dope addiction rather than a Bupe addiction..
 
That is the problem with bupe/methadone. They are great for maintenance, as well as short term detoxes. The problem is mindset. Back when I first got on methadone due to a heroin problem, my mind wasn't ready to quit opiates. Now, more than a year later, my mind IS ready to quit. Problem is, I obviously became dependent to the methadone so w/d is inevitable. Same thing with bupe. Dependence is inevitable if taken for more than a few weeks.

But, having been on ~70mg methadone daily for the past year or so, 8 days ago I said fuck it and just stopped going to the clinic, and am detoxing on my own with subs, only over the course of a couple weeks so I don't gain a dependence to THAT as well.

Biggest difference is mindset.
 
How much does Immodium actually help with withdrawal symptoms? I thought it couldn't cross the BBB therefore its assistance was mostly with indegestive system withdrawal? I'm currently at 48 hours since my last line of drugs, and with only 6mg of Suboxone trying to do a rapid 4 day taper. I'm terrified at the end of the 4th day when I'm out of subs I'm going to be miserable, but if Immodium really helps I may consider it. I don't have access to any benzos.
 
Loperamide (Ingredient in immodium) actually helps greatly with withdrawals. There are vast amounts of varying reports on it, but you are incorrect about the BBB. It DOES cross it, albeit in VERY small amounts. So taking 4mg or whatever the recommended dose is, won't cause any receptor agonism obviously. But many people (myself included) are stern supporters of high doses of loperamide being about to nearly halt all withdrawal symptoms. Not entirely, but enough to feel 'almost' normal. OTC Methadone may be a little too far, but it certainly is very helpful with more than just GI issues.

I recommend the liquid, as it is easier to drink half a cup of liquid, than down 40 2mg pills. There are a number of threads on lope on this site.

Loperamide Search Results
 
I think the first few days are the worst - the mental and emotional anguish. The FEAR! I am in day 1 right now (and honestly no intention of staying clean. I can't stop crying I hate this so much) and the pain is unbearable. I have been through this so many times, beat myself up over getting to this same place 'over and over' again (as my nose drips onto my desk). I personally don't have many stomach issues (strange as my habit 'is not small'), but perhaps this is due to my very very small appetite and intake throughout the day.

I have a prescription for temazepam as well as clonazepam that I use for my benefit. I take TUMS if need be (but as I said - a rarity). As far as physical pain - I feel as though my knees/lower legs are retaining fluids. I am treated for knee (and ankle/foot) pain --hmmm, correlation? I can't squat - lest I stand back up. Sitting still is impossible and hot/cold sweats/chills are horrendous.

Faaahk. I say, in sum, thank goodness for benzodiazepines and anti-diarrheals (and a CLEAN toilet - wink). Ahh, speaking of bathrooms (I'm restless - and seemingly unaffected by my clonazepam) SHOWERS are great to help the body (and mind) relax.
 
subs in my country are very-very hard to get so ive been through 10-15 major withdrawals that took me weeks to get over.only thing i use is imodium cause it the only thing available fro a cheap price.

from my years inside the junkie enviroment i think that each person fears most different things about their withdrawal symtom.some cry fro their backbones others for their feet.others throw up for days.most of the people i have talked to cant stand their feet.myself i dont have stomach problems but my feet are killing me.i change sides to my bed every 4-5 seconds.i cant stand up and i cant lie down.another thing that kills me is my saliva.my saliva transforms into a sticky jello-type substance and when i try to spit it out it seems like a huge blob that starts at my stomach and ends at my mouth but with no way of spitting it out in smaller pieces.i feel like if i put my hand inside my mouth and grab it and start pulling it out it will come out just like a rope.its disgusting..
i also have insomnia for days and days..i stay without sleep for 72 hours.im tired like hell and my eyes burn and are all watery but i simply cannot sleep.also in the winter the cold seems to magnify ten times with all that sweating.

still the worst for me is the days following the end of the physical withdrawal syndrome.i lay in my room totally empty.i dont want to see anyone,dont want to eat,dont want to do nothing at all..its my hell.my psychology takes up to 2 weeks untill i find the courage to face the world again.
 
As one said, hardest part is losing the ritual. Sometimes I feel like Leo DiCaprio in Basketball Diaries, when he's in Ernie Hudson's apartment by himself, and his addiction is eating his brain and making his world spin, until he finally, inevitably gives in and robs the joint to go score. It's a sucky life, but the ritual is great. I'm on Day 4 off of Rox, and I'm trying a new treatment. It's revolutionary. Immodium in the morning, with half of a 30mg Adderall. The other half in the afternoon. The occasional bump of a half here and there on weekends is OK, since that's prime time for your opiates, and you need to replace. Gonna do this for two to three weeks, break the opiate ritual, HOPEFULLY not create a new ritual, and then taper myself off of this, which is still very new to me (I've never taken an amphetamine before) so it shouldn't be that hard. I know it's a stupid plan lol, but I'm just soooooooo sick of kicking Rox for a day or two and then the ritual sucking me right back in. Anyway, good luck, sounds like we all need it!
 
^^ I agree. The hardest part is staying clean. because the longer your out of the game, the harder it is to remember how bad it really was. and you start to convince yourself that you could handle it this time, or you only remember the "good times" when really none of it was fun in the end. getting clean is easy, staying clean is the hardest part.
 
learning how to make sober friends and enjoy their company.

bc i conquer the physical w.d easily now (using 4meoPCP and methoxetamine). then i get bored and lonely and depressed and end up hanging out with druggies, relapse, rinse, repeat.

how do i change my attitude and my whole m.o. in life?!?
 
So last evening was 24 hours since my last dose and the start of wd's crept up...running nose, sneezing, yawning, and the shits...hot cold sweats.

First i grabbed the immodium. I took 6 2mg pills and drank half a bottle of that minty crap..then i took .1 clonidine and right before bed 1 mg of antvan...i felt ok but was still restless so i popped one more 1 mg antivan.

Well i slept all night...I am at work now but feel groggy as hell...im only going to be here for a few hours and wont be back till monday...

Im glad my habit was not huge...this may be easier than i thought.

so far so good.....Immodium rocks...
 
morning day two feeling ok...took 22mg of immodium last night with clonidine and before bedtime 2mg antivan....feeling groggy as hell.
I am finding out not being physically sick really really helps with mental cravings.

Todays motto,,,,,,keep sober. this will be the day that my guy will call....fuck it im shutting my phone off. im done with this roller coaster.
 
PAWS isn't proven to exist in all or even most -- don't let people assume it does, it only creates another handicap for them to get clean. I thought I was reading bluelight.ru (.nu), not soberrecovery.com.
 
PAWS is rather new-founded.

and i get some pride personally, kicking that shit in a personal way.
its hard to deny w/d symptoms, but, its hard to deny the convenience of methadone maintenance, for the manufacturers of methadone either.

.nu .ru .ne
its a harm-reduction site.

there are countless threads that arent about sobriety, or "Detoxing".
you could learn new ways to mash up new OC's, different fentanyl mediums, or what to do with acetone, you can read a lot about a lot more to do with .nu, and more of what i mean Here
 
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