Mental Health depression and anxiety is taking over my life.

[opiodmaniac]

well folks it hasn't been so good for me lately in short, I basically broke down and told my mom all about
my anxiety,depression,bipolar(not sure of this one but
pretty damn sure), ADHD, and overall shitty quality of life and we had a long talk in which I told her all of my thoughts (which seem to be very dark lately).... so to make it to the point I told her I'm crazy but I don't want help... it weird as fuck. I suffer with life everyday and have contemplated suicide many times lately. about a week ago I tried killing myself via IV oxymorphone that didn't work so just tonight I tried again with a simple self strangulation with a belt and passed out and woke up a little whole later just pissed off I couldn't kill myself right... I don't know what to do. fuck it I might just go eat a bullet. anyway love u guys, And appreciate the help!

 

[spork]

I'm sorry things haven't been going well for you lately, opiodmaniac. Did telling your mom about it help at all? I know for me when I told my mom about all the shit going on with my mental health, I felt like a huge burden was relieved and I didn't have to keep it to myself any longer. Try to reach out to family and friends right now. I know it's tempting to isolate yourself, but that could just strengthen the bad thoughts.

If the feelings are overwhelming and you think you really might hurt yourself please call the national suicide prevention lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 and get yourself to the ER. Please get the help that you need and keep us updated.

 

[Black Rabbit of Inle]

Hey opiod,

That's good that you opened up and told your mother what's going on. It can be hard to deal with these things things on your own. Why do you say that you don't want help though? I'm sorry to hear about your suicide attempts though. Do you have anything going on in your life to focus your energies on at the moment?

 

[opiodmaniac]

yeah it wasnt easy opening up to my mom but it just eventually kinda came out… and yeah it helped some i guess but she wants me to get help but i just dont believe in getting labeled crazy by doctors and shit. so i deperatly need help (obviously) but my pride/mind wont let me get it. therfore mental warfare is constant with me. and yeah i was positive the oxymorphone was gonna do me in 40mgs of IR…. but i somehow survived it.
and no i have nothing to really focus energy on. i hate hobbies i hate work, i hate everything. this could also just be the depression talking but i dont fucking know anymore. all i know is this cant keep going on and i cant seem to make myself get help… i guess i deserve it.

 

[spork]

No, you don't deserve to feel this way. No one does. I understand your worries about getting labeled by doctors and other people. I had the same fear for years as well. Doctors are there to help you though, they won't judge you. Can you talk to your mom about your worries and maybe she can go with you to get the help? It might be a little less daunting with her there to support you.

You're still here for a reason. You're a survivor and I think you can get through this.

 

[opiodmaniac]

how do I go about revealing my use of IV drugs? (not daily but probably on average ill shoot up something 1-3 times every 2 weeks but enough to where I have pretty obvious tracks?) so im also stuck if I need to go to a psychiatrist or a doctor? like who can help me out the most? considering I want to treat ADHD, depression, and anxiety? I'm so lost and honestly just don't what to do. and my mom is not accepting AT ALL of drug use. so I haven't told her all about me ya know? im sorry for so many questions but I need help and advice because to be honest I'm not in. the right state of mind to make a major decision right now.... (obviously if you're trying to kill yourself something's up)

edit: I didn't mean to say how should I reveal my use of iv drugs but I meant to say IF I should reveal my use of iv drugs

 

[spork]

I'd probably go to a psychiatrist rather than a general practitioner. They know more about what you've been going through and will most likely be able to treat you better. You may need to see a physician first to get referred to a psychiatrist though. If that's the case, I'd just straight up ask them to refer you. Let them know about the ADHD, depression, and anxiety and also the suicidal thoughts. You can go into more detail when you see the psychiatrist. I personally would tell the psychiatrist about the drug use. It's important that they know because it may interact with other medications they prescribe and it could help them take care of you more efficiently.

Personally, I didn't tell my psychiatrist and psychologist about my drug use and I regret it because I think my use exacerbated my symptoms at least some what and I think I would have been treated in a more timely manner if I just straight up told them to begin with.

Don't apologize for the questions, that's what we're here for.

 

[Howl]

well folks it hasn't been so good for me lately in short, I basically broke down and told my mom all about
my anxiety,depression,bipolar(not sure of this one but
pretty damn sure), ADHD, and overall shitty quality of life and we had a long talk in which I told her all of my thoughts (which seem to be very dark lately).... so to make it to the point I told her I'm crazy but I don't want help... it weird as fuck. I suffer with life everyday and have contemplated suicide many times lately. about a week ago I tried killing myself via IV oxymorphone that didn't work so just tonight I tried again with a simple self strangulation with a belt and passed out and woke up a little whole later just pissed off I couldn't kill myself right... I don't know what to do. fuck it I might just go eat a bullet. anyway love u guys, And appreciate the help!

I can relate to this. I was about to write a whole lot about reaching out to your family but there's more wisdom here I see.

Where do you live? And what's your financial status? This can affect the level and kind of help you get greatly...

I would shut it about the drug use and especially the needles. This can bar you from getting better. Here it's like that.
But if you're living in a more open society go for it. Needles though... I would leave that out anyway.
About telling mom I don't know about your relationship nor her as a person but I know of ppl who got thrown out of their homes from their families, which they thought would help... God....

You haven't gone the walk yet it seems. If nothing helps well you'll damn whoever talked you into not ending it

If you're truly bipolar (what kind?) this is the kind of shit that happens... What you need is tools and knowhow to combat the lows.

Also when seeking help try to get someone who knows the business to recommend you a psychiatrist. Some just don't give a shit.

 

[SilverStars]

I can sympathize with you. I have anxiety, depression, add, and possible bipolar. There are times where I spend days in bed and only my obligations get me up. Don't have a lot of support as well.

I don't have much to say in terms of advice but I can always lend an ear. Life does suck some times but i would say that your one hell of a person if you stick through it and make it.

Hope you find the support you need and keep strong!

 

[Jerry Atrick]

how do I go about revealing my use of IV drugs? (not daily but probably on average ill shoot up something 1-3 times every 2 weeks but enough to where I have pretty obvious tracks?) so im also stuck if I need to go to a psychiatrist or a doctor? like who can help me out the most? considering I want to treat ADHD, depression, and anxiety? I'm so lost and honestly just don't what to do. and my mom is not accepting AT ALL of drug use. so I haven't told her all about me ya know? im sorry for so many questions but I need help and advice because to be honest I'm not in. the right state of mind to make a major decision right now.... (obviously if you're trying to kill yourself something's up)

edit: I didn't mean to say how should I reveal my use of iv drugs but I meant to say IF I should reveal my use of iv drugs

If you are feeling this bad and have already attempted suicide twice, I would go to the ER. Now. They will know what to do.

You have to tell the docs about your IV drug use.

This kind of stuff, life and death, is more than what you're family is equipped to handle. Yes, it is good that you felt you could confide in your mother but this problem needs to be handed over to the professionals who actually know how to help you.

 

[mrflowers00]

if you've been attempting suicide the fact that you're talking about it tells me you have reservations about going through with it you should really go to the ER and tell them about it and see about getting checked into a psych ward they can really help you if you keep an open mind