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Dear Aussies: What does White Christmas taste like?

Mysterier

Mysterier

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A cursory search yielded the result of "slinky vanilla" as a descriptor. Please explain.

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Firstly, a White Christmas is as racist as fuck and no Australian under 25 educated at a state school or university would ever agree to participate in one.

This is why your first picture contains a Brown Person. All Australian families celebrating Christmas are legally required to ensure that a Brown Person is in attendance and seated somewhere near the head of the table, not wearing food-stained black trousers and a clip-on bow tie sitting out the back peeling prawns or serving drinks for $20 an hour.
 
VerbalTruist said:
@Mysterier I think that the closest they come is white hot fries. Man made or wildland.
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Now, white hot fries sounds pretty good. I know a guy called Steve who makes some beastly chips. 👍

Perforated said:
Firstly, a White Christmas is as racist as fuck and no Australian under 25 educated at a state school or university would ever agree to participate in one.

This is why your first picture contains a Brown Person. All Australian families celebrating Christmas are legally required to ensure that a Brown Person is in attendance and seated somewhere near the head of the table, not wearing food-stained black trousers and a clip-on bow tie sitting out the back peeling prawns or serving drinks for $20 an hour.
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Thanks for not confusing this further with your expert delineation, @Perforated. A welcomed clarity.
 
The slinky shown in the second picture is what working class Australian parents use every other year as a stocking stuffer for the next kid in line. Even if they live in a one level house with no steps.

They are hated by kids because they come from Target and all kids know that parents who love their kids don’t shop at Target. They shop at David Jones or wherever ponies, deck shoes, and LaCoste shirts come from.

Fortunately though, they get apreciated when re-discovered by these unloved kids when they get into huffing meth and tweaking out to fill the great empty hole in their hearts where their parents love should have been - because the public housing towers where you score meth in Australia have thousands of steps and the lifts are always broken and you can slink for hours in between bags.
 
Mysterier said:
Now, white hot fries sounds pretty good. I know a guy called Steve who makes some beastly chips. 👍



Thanks for not confusing this further with your expert delineation, @Perforated. A welcomed clarity.
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I said FIRES and I meant FIRES. Don't be editing me, dude. @Perforated I dig your response. Maybe they have mandated checks to make sure there is at least one POC in the group? Lots of black face going on to fool the Aussie Piggies perhaps? @n3ophy7e you wanna chime in?
 
Vanilla beans and frangipani flowers are what tradesmen’s wives use to freshen up their bathroom if they have guests over for lunch on Christmas Day. They like it because it reminds them of that one time they went to Bali in the low-season and stayed a week in the Sheraton getting massages while their husbands drank beer with the barmaid/hookers down in Kuta instead of playing golf with their mates like they said they were doing.

It’s very effective for covering up the smell of bleach their bathrooms normally have but it’s not cheap so they only use it at Christmas or if their gender-curious son brings home for dinner a new friend from a Private School he met at the university he chose instead of doing an apprenticeship with his dad and getting a decent trade like a real man.
 
Perforated said:
like a real man.
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Just this week I heard on the radio about some dude that made a series something along the lines of "Real Jobs For Real Men". The basic premise is that nobody wanna be artisans anymore and thus there's a shortage of skilled artisans e.g. plumbers, electricians, you get the picture. This is supposed to change that narrative and provide insights and training. In the USA if memory serves me correctly. Cannot find anything about it/him on the Internet though (just searched). Just you fucking wait until the WOKE mob get a load of that.
 
Perforated said:
Fortunately though, they get apreciated when re-discovered by these unloved kids when they get into huffing meth and tweaking out to fill the great empty hole in their hearts where their parents love should have been - because the public housing towers where you score meth in Australia have thousands of steps and the lifts are always broken and you can slink for hours in between bags.
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I genuinely lol'd 🤣

VerbalTruist said:
I said FIRES and I meant FIRES. Don't be editing me, dude. @Perforated I dig your response. Maybe they have mandated checks to make sure there is at least one POC in the group? Lots of black face going on to fool the Aussie Piggies perhaps? @n3ophy7e you wanna chime in?
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Mate I seriously have no idea what the fuck any of you are talking about in this thread 🤣

VerbalTruist said:
I'll suck you if you suck me.
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Bill Hader Popcorn GIF
 
Glad you like the back and forth @n3ophy7e. @Mysterier still hasn't answered me about the suck off which just hurts my feelings. It's supposed to be a Festivus for the rest of us, right? So, like... That means getting all gooey with your buddy right?
 
Usually I go to work and cook my residents a roast dinner, thus scoring myself a free roast in the process.
 
dalpat077 said:
Just this week I heard on the radio about some dude that made a series something along the lines of "Real Jobs For Real Men". The basic premise is that nobody wanna be artisans anymore and thus there's a shortage of skilled artisans e.g. plumbers, electricians, you get the picture. This is supposed to change that narrative and provide insights and training. In the USA if memory serves me correctly. Cannot find anything about it/him on the Internet though (just searched). Just you fucking wait until the WOKE mob get a load of that.
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This is why I am looking at a 6 figure potential for 2022 while barely graduating high school with a 1.0 GPA. I’d probably already be there if cancer didn’t kick my ass the past 3yrs.

But no one should do trades, it’s really hard work and all that.. ;)

I’ll finish with, I know a guy that 5yrs ago (probably a lot more now) was make a quarter million a year doing nothing but installing shower pans. Find that niche trade and ride it.

-GC
 
Some very silly replies in this thread so far.

OP- In all seriousness a "White Christmas" in Australia refers to a traditional act in which a married couple put there children to sleep at bedtime after a busy day.

Following this, they usually head back to the bathroom or bedroom where the mother will undress herself and perform oral sex on the dad. He can choose where abouts on her body to ejaculate thus resulting in a 'White Christmas' usually all over her breasts or face.
 
n3ophy7e said:
I will fuck myself in my own ass if @Mysterier wasn't originally referring to this:
White Christmas <-- click me
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I think you're right. Cannot believe I actually spent time searching "australia white christmas" but all results returned something similar (recipes for this shit). As one site put it: it's the closest you're going to come to having a White Christmas in Australia.

It's even got its own Wikipedia page:

en.wikipedia.org

White Christmas (food) - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org en.wikipedia.org

So I'm guessing this thread wasn't of the facetious joking around type and the million Aussie Dollar question still remains I guess i.e. what does it taste like?

Sure looks like Nougat to me though (at very last in appearance).
 
dalpat077 said:
the million Aussie Dollar question still remains I guess i.e. what does it taste like?

Sure looks like Nougat to me though (at very last in appearance).
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I used to make it every Christmas! It looks like nougat but it's nothing like it. It's more like melty white chocolate with nuts, dried coconut and fruit in it. My favourite combination is dried cranberries, dessicated coconut and pistachios. It's actually fuckn delicious! 😊
 
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