When you listen to your music after creation, what is it you hate about it? Is it you feel it could be your technique was poor or the whole thing is creatively poor? Many musicians are hard on themselves for poor musicianship but that can be fixed.
^^^I think what makes me hate it is the realisation that the excatic great feeling I had experienced while in the process of making it, is not being evoked by what I've done and something is missing no matter how hard I try. I agree that improving the skill would in some way provide more satisfaction at the end but what I'm talking about is rather deeper...
The same force which promotes the single celled organism to grope around and move into new spaces is the same thing at the heart of our creativity. Curiosity and desire. Inherently programmed into all biological life.
Our creativity appears to be very complex and dynamic to us, and we love to take credit for it of course. But we're not all that dissimilar from the single celled organism in reality.
^^^I greatly agree with that statement - it feels that the Universe simply wants to express itself as it's the only way of being of everything, but I also get curious thinking that as species we, humans, have gotten some incredible abilities to do that.
For me, the creation of it is the best part (I'm talking about music here mostly), but I LOVE a good recording of me and/or my band. Having some of those recordings is almost the best part because now it's this idea that is fixed into permanence, and by re-listening I can re-experience that moment to some extent, and have new moments where the feelings of that moment are transposed over the new feelings of the new moment.
^^^Don't get me wrong - I really enjoy making music and painting and that's why I started doing it - provides the best relief from feeling of reality imbalance that pushes you to express and flow out sometimes.
And yes, creating something alongside with others could be very amazing! :D As a matter of fact by this day, some of the most incredible times of my life were taking acid (again...) with two of my friends and playing music and painting together. The level of honesty, understanding, openness and life's fulfillment were over the top!

8) Unfortunately these moments are rare in life.
That’s why I love studying psychedelics. It’s proof to me that the route to deeper connection with God isn’t more prayers or in a monastery or in rituals, but it’s already there inside of me.
^^^I come to realize that we can make a "portal to God" anytime anywhere and we dont even need a concept of a ritual, religion, belief system or even God itself - it IS already inside all of us. IME it takes a lot of effort to break through the illusion spell that we ourselves put on, but psychedelics allow us to "cut to the chase" effectively and have a glimpse of satori sometimes.
A three year old will make a drawing to express an idea--usually for him or her self alone--they don't even care if anyone else sees it or not; nor are they usually even interested in it themselves once its done. They are critical only when it does not express what they had envisioned but rather than being discouraged, they just try again. And again and again. There is no cataloguing of failure going on in their minds--it is pure process, pure learning. The minute kids come to school all that changes and the critical voice goes from being a motivator to shutting down the whole creative process by introducing the fear of "failure" and the shame of "failure". A word that I tried to get the kids to substitute for failure when it came to art was 'practice'.
^^^That is a beautiful observation,
herbavore!
Perhaps the overly critical look at your own creation originates in ability to construct positive reinforcing connection and feedback to others while maintaining a healthy ego...
Creating for me is all about achieving the flow state. When this happens and it is pure engagement, just like for my long-ago three year old self, there is no final product to love or hate.
^^^Yes, that is the time of the most honesty and the deepest levels of expression possible, the time that allows us everything.
I feel that way a lot, without tripping. It’s probably my biggest struggle is not become a contemplative hermit and because I have a wife and kids feeling trapped in the world. I take some comfort that monks and hermits themselves say it doesn’t make it easier. They still worry and are driven by their egos of who can pray the longest or who gets to clean the holy vases, and on and on.
It's interesting that OP finds a lot of human creations repulsive whilst under a psychedelic influence, but creations of the natural world to be acceptable or sublime even. I think there's a parallel aspect in there to this idea of hating art or the artistic process when it is done for money or at any point is simply a contrivance. I know from my experiences that I simply can not stand to be around human creations either whilst on psychedelics, it's why I haven't done them in years; TV is like sandpaper to my mind, the rigid and plain geometry of buildings to be claustrophobic, the very banal utterances of people grate on me even if they're high and trying to be expressive. It all turns me right off.
^^^I'm glad to hear I'm not alone in my world's perception!
Is this disdain a projection of our minds, an internal conflict, or is there an objectivity to beauty or art? Personally I have always believed there is an objectivity to it, one strand of it very evident in all classical arts, music, architecture, and it's everywhere throughout nature - what's called sacred geometry, but basically ratio and proportion. The other strand is more subtle and ethereal, and not easy to grasp or pin down to the material world.. but I believe it is there and it is like an essence, a point, mystery, je ne sais quoi. Nature exudes both components confidently without hesitation, whereas our creative products can be unbalanced between the two strands.. but if it is lacking the second strand it can be the most proportioned piece of art imaginable but feel hollow and grating to some internal part of us. The best art is proportioned and communicates mystery or a point, and not just to yourself. Nature is the best at it of course, as close to perfection as we'll ever see in this dimension.
As humans I think it's easy to see human thinking and action in human creative pieces, obviously, which diminishes things somewhat whereas what nature produces seems to remain largely a mystery to us in terms of that je ne sais quai. Even with the great human works of art you can still intuit the hidden aspect, whereas with nature its largely unknowable and we can't dialogue with it.
^^^ O! :D That is precisely what I meant to say!..
The mystery, that unseen part of art that just makes you immediately present and filled with understanding and meaning - there sure are some works of art capable of doing that and I'd say most of it is well-known and respected for that reason. Just like A. Huxley drew parallels between precious stones and metals seen within the mind's eye and our crude imitation of it as a form of art manipulating gold, silver, diamonds, e.t.c and giving them such high value - because they are the closest to the divine visions embedded in us and they are able to invoke those deep feelings of awe while looking at them.
Honestly I see human works as natural too. I mean, we're a part of nature. Spiders create webs that are beautiful. Other animals create too, so why are the things we create somehow set apart? Why are they ugly when things other life creates are not? To me, the attempt to imitate nature in art is beautiful in itself, and sometimes it brings out something new, especially in the case of abstract art. The sum total of what all life brings to the table is what nature is. I know you probably don't mean it this way, but I think it's maybe not the best thing when people refer to "us vs nature", because we ARE part of nature, there is no distinction. It makes sense to talk about it using that language though, since our culture and others have had a very long history of trying to set ourselves apart from nature, as if we can be greater than nature. The roots of that attitude are in survival, so it makes sense if you think about it why it developed, but it's still a shame and it leads to cognitive dissonance in my opinion.
^^^I'm sorry for not being perfectly clear. By human creation in this context I assume more of a conscious design, rather than automatically flowed, "natural" patterned behavior (like spider and spiderwebs). There's something unique to humans that makes our creations to stand out both with extreme ugliness and emptiness and with God-like beauty.
I love looking at art while tripping, maybe not as much as I look staring at a tree or something, but both are worthwhile to me.
^^^When I'm into +++ and higher territory, I sometimes find all art to be somewhat abrasive, annoying and messy (sometimes it makes me feel like it's too much) - while turning to simple patterns found in nature never exhaust itself in that way for me.
Question Volsam - If you hate human creations, especially your own, while tripping, do you also hate humans? Do you hate yourself? if not, what is the distinction then?
^^^Come to think of that, I think I do hate humans in a way, myself included...
And not necessarily while tripping, although it provides for the most intense experiences of these kind - at times I would feel the heaviness and pain of the whole world.
I also have the feeling sometimes that there is something broken inside of me and all the people around, and we just cant do anything about it but to observe and try to capture the "drama". I guess it's a "side-effect" of our ability to internalize all experience.
