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Mental Health Coming Off Invega Sustenna (Paliperidone) v.2

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I really just want to go on long jogs again. Get in shape and feel the desire for woman again. Sex used to be all I thought about. Now its like I forgot all about it. What is sex again? The furthest I can run is like 20 feet before giving up. My life is pathetic. Going to work and coming home to watch Netflix is my life. Nothing will change until I "recover". Decisive is the proof I need to stay happy and positive. It's all about patience and thankful you aren't dead cuz someday we all will be, atleast we're alive and time flies so we will recover fast if we stay busy with a job or something.
 
A friend of mine had her birthday last week, so saturday she invited me for a dinner with 3 of other friends. Like any other invitations to going out, I was about to stay home like always, but on the last minute I was just though for myself, sh*t I am always complaining about my life and doing nothing, I need to get my ass out of this couch and get out, so that's what I did, it was my first move after one year and half. I went to the dinner, it was a nepal restaurant with great food, then we went out for some bars and I drunk a few beers and a shot of tequila and smoke like 5 cigars all night, I didn't got drunked, but I felt good for the small chat and have the chance to see all the beautiful women on nightlife :P

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Here a photo of the dinner, I am the guy with the glasses :)

Yesterday another friend of mine, John, had also his birthday, and he invited me for some beers on the afternoon, at the park we have in out city, cheap beers on that location. He invites me like every weekend to go out and do something. And yesterday I felt that he (and also me) desearve that I present. I meet with all my long life weed smokers friends yesterday afternoon, so of course they were all smoking pot and celebrating John birthday, but I wasn't really ashamed or excluded, it felt good to be really awake, my eyes wide open, and fully aware and intellectually conscious during the conversation. They all felt really amazed about seeing me again after one year and half, it was like I were back from the ashes ahah, reborned. I didn't really told my parents about yesterday (I did tell about saturday because it was a female friend non smoker lol), they would go crazy if they wonder I were joining back to them again... sadly they don't understand that being with them doesn't mean I will smoke weed again..

Well it seems I am getting back to the race of living, going out and stuff, feeling good it seems,
Wish you all the best !
Mister T
 
[MENTION=400718]PhuckInvegga[/MENTION]

I feel the same way. Atleast you can hold down a job, I lost mine since all this bullshit begun.
 
[MENTION=392657]MisterTi[/MENTION] , glad you're having some fun. Going out places to eat was very uncomfortable for a while - when I was first on the injection. If you're confident enough to go out there and just sit down and eat, I'm actually a little jealous. BTW: your friends look like nice people.
 
iridescentblack said:
@MisterTi , glad you're having some fun. Going out places to eat was very uncomfortable for a while - when I was first on the injection. If you're confident enough to go out there and just sit down and eat, I'm actually a little jealous. BTW: your friends look like nice people.
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Hey [MENTION=381888]iridescentblack[/MENTION] thank you!
For me on start I also struggled on going out, I was having panic attacks with all the crowed, there was one time that I though I would die, and start breathing so fast, I closed myself on the bathroom, and just waited to calm down, while my family were on the restaurant waiting for me... it was really bad.
Now I can be with people again, and feeling away better I must say.
Still not getting as much fun as I would want, but that comes with time I think :)
Thanks for your support, don't get jealous, you will get this times aswell and then I wanna see also photos :D
Take care!
 
I'm finally off the drugs guys :) The community team decided today to leave me be, healing journey begins :)

So stoked and happy! Thanks to all who inboxed me and posted, you guys actually gave me the hope i needed during my darkest times, forever grateful for that!

Speechless at the moment, almost forgot what it's like to be free from the system!
 
ZombieMode said:
I'm finally off the drugs guys :) The community team decided today to leave me be, healing journey begins :)

So stoked and happy! Thanks to all who inboxed me and posted, you guys actually gave me the hope i needed during my darkest times, forever grateful for that!

Speechless at the moment, almost forgot what it's like to be free from the system!
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Congratulations man! Hope you have a speedy recovery off this horrible drug.
 
[MENTION=400718]PhuckInvegga[/MENTION] Thank you for the info on the other page about the amount you were taking and how long you were off it, and also your notes about going to the beach and other tropical rewards. I'm glad you're making progress, at least with time off the meds. I'm especially glad that you're done with that first really tough month. Anyway, you're right in saying that we do have a lot to live for, and I think it applies whether we're on or off the meds. As long as we continue to hold on to what we believe in, there is hope. P.s. My user name is not "Teresagreen". I'm a dude, it's
"trees are green" if you space it out.
[MENTION=392657]MisterTi[/MENTION] I'm so glad that you are able to go out and party and socialize like normal. You've moved on. Congratulations! Your friends look like a fun bunch! P.s. I can relate to the panic attacks in the crowded situation too. It's good to hear that this side effect has completely left you.
[MENTION=384401]ZombieMode[/MENTION] it's great that the community team became supportive of your efforts. I'm so happy for you that you've left all this sorrow. I can't wait to hear all the wonderful things you'll be doing. [MENTION=308678]Narshe81[/MENTION] I hope you are doing well, too, Narshe. Haven't heard from you in a while. I trust that all is well.

I now know what you all mean by anhedonia. I sometimes feel like I can't get up in the morning because nothing will motivate me. I feel like I've missed out on all the important things in life. Everyone feels so far ahead of me in life, that it's hard just to enjoy things like meals and sleep. People have moved away from their parents and got careers, people got cars, people are out socializing, people got married, people got to travel to other countries. All my most embarrassing moments which led me here come back to me in the morning.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have financial and social issues which have put pressure on me separately from the meds. And sometimes it may seem like getting off Invega Sustenna is the solution to everything. For me, it wouldn't be the solution to everything.

But, you guys give me such great inspiration that one day, I will be able to get off these meds with the support of a well established and caring community group. And I will be able to go further in restoring my life, too. Best wishes to anyone in any stage of progress, or even anyone who is still on the meds waiting for a chance in life to come off. The stories I have seen today are a real inspiration.
 
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If there is any blessing that comes from Invega sustenna, it's that deep down realization that you truly had everything you needed before this dull reality began. I never knew that, my whole life I felt inadequate, I always felt incomplete, searching for happiness.. Well now that I really am incomplete from Invega hollowing me out. I know that it was in my possession all along, If I could only enjoy life in the moment. When we all recover we will know that life is about adventure, its about taking risks, making mistakes and laughing about how crazy you are for even trying. Mister Ti, having a beer with friends! That's what life's about! Whatever you want to call it. All the little things you do, all the countless adventures are waiting on the other side. It may feel like you're missing out on a lot now and you are, but without this experience, everyday life from the day you recover on (much more than a year or 2 years) will be fully appreciated with a healthy body and powerful mind. Anything is possible for an Invega survivor. We will do our short time in this prison, and then, for the rest of life we will see things clearer than the general population. We will become masters of reality. Rising to any occasion and emerging victorious, conquerors of life as we know it. That may seem cheesy and it is cheesy, but its true.
 
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Today I'm renting one of those CES machines from a counseling center for 6 weeks. I'll try to update you guys if I see any improvement.

Also I finally got approved for disability, and I'm insured since I got the shot, so that's one blessing.

Its been about 5 and a half months. I wish I could stay active on this thread but invega just takes the life out of me.
 
NotAPsycho said:
Today I'm renting one of those CES machines from a counseling center for 6 weeks. I'll try to update you guys if I see any improvement.

Also I finally got approved for disability, and I'm insured since I got the shot, so that's one blessing.

Its been about 5 and a half months. I wish I could stay active on this thread but invega just takes the life out of me.
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Yes please keep us updated on the ces machine, maybe it is the magic sol'n we are looking for. How much you pay to rent it
 
It was $150, 5 weeks sorry. I'm trying it now. They also sell the machines online, also called alpha stim. But you need a doctors prescription. The guy who rented me the thing is doing a brain scan on me in a few weeks to see what's going on up there. Then there's plenty of options, different simulations to try. Fingers are crossed!
 
Coffee seems to reduce some of the symptoms for the duration that the caffeine lasts. I'm also drinking detox tea with hibiscus every once in a while. Slowed down on drinking coconut water due to too many bowel movements a day. Today's another off day. Probably not gonna take my usual walk this evening. Just taking a break.

Waiting patiently til I can finally do chi gong again. I haven't been able to do it lately because - with my energy blocked - the sessions leave me drained instead of full of vitality. But it's like the basis (the holy grail) to my daily schedule. Once I get that going as a routine, I'll be on fire. Probably just a matter of weeks now.
 
PhuckInvegga said:
If there is any blessing that comes from Invega sustenna, it's that deep down realization that you truly had everything you needed before this dull reality began. I never knew that, my whole life I felt inadequate, I always felt incomplete, searching for happiness.. Well now that I really am incomplete from Invega hollowing me out. I know that it was in my possession all along, If I could only enjoy life in the moment.
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I totally agree with you. I think there is some cognitive decline with Invega. I definitely feel like I had everything I needed before I got on it. The only thing that keeps me on it is a sense of duty to family. I would like to get off it but I don't want to give up the closeness I have with my family. (They are all very biomedically oriented). When you say, living in the moment, I keep thinking of that one thing in every situation that I had before, in which I could have done something different and could have tolerated the situation instead of more risk taking, which led me to being on Invega. Of course, risk taking is going to work in your favor since at least your family and community approve of your decision. I'll still keep reading everyone's posts and researching the ways to come off the meds, because Lord knows I'm going to need it someday.

NotAPsycho said:
Today I'm renting one of those CES machines from a counseling center for 6 weeks. I'll try to update you guys if I see any improvement.

Also I finally got approved for disability, and I'm insured since I got the shot, so that's one blessing.
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I'm trying to apply for disability too. I want to ask, what kind of things did you have to say in order to get on disability, if you don't mind me asking. If you do mind, you don't have to respond. And what do you mean when you say that getting the shot makes you insured. Was it a shot you just got now, or was it because you were on Invega before?
 
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treesaregreen said:
I totally agree with you. I think there is some cognitive decline with Invega. I definitely feel like I had everything I needed before I got on it. The only thing that keeps me on it is a sense of duty to family. I would like to get off it but I don't want to give up the closeness I have with my family. (They are all very biomedically oriented). When you say, living in the moment, I keep thinking of that one thing in every situation that I had before, in which I could have done something different and could have tolerated the situation instead of more risk taking, which led me to being out on Invega. Of course, risk taking is going to work in your favor since at least your family and community approve of your decision. I'll still keep reading everyone's posts and researching the ways to come off the meds, because Lord knows I'm going to need it someday.
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Really you need to do everything in our power to get off it. I decided to go on cause parents and doctors pressured me too, I did it to make mom happy I guess. You think my mom is happy having a bed ridden child who stays home all day. You need to get off, your family may act in your best interest, but that does not necessarily mean they know what is in your best interest. This drug is poison! Get off it now b4 its too late.
 
Gdvffh said:
Really you need to do everything in our power to get off it. I decided to go on cause parents and doctors pressured me too, I did it to make mom happy I guess. You think my mom is happy having a bed ridden child who stays home all day. You need to get off, your family may act in your best interest, but that does not necessarily mean they know what is in your best interest. This drug is poison! Get off it now b4 its too late.
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My parents will argue that the Invega controls the scatterbrained schizoid and paranoid delusional thoughts, and that the benefits outweigh the costs. They'll say that if i get off the meds that I'm not staying on track. I have a history of running away from things and changing my mind quickly. My parents had to rescue me financially several times when I was independent. I'd practically have to move away to get off of it, and then I wouldn't know where to go to taper(or I could just go cold turkey like many others). I've had a history of being on antipsychotics in high school and college. The concern is that I'd be noncompliant if I took pills. I've also had a history of not keeping jobs, so I have to wait for disability before I can go anywhere. I have no car and my friends all live far away.

So maybe one or two years at least, before a possible change in situation, but I'll keep trying.
 
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I d be happy if recovery is done after 2 years....but i am not sure if we ever will recover....well at least for me... :(( i dont wanna annoy you or sound too negative but nothing changed for me in 1 year...everybody here has gotten better only i havent felt improvements which is so sad and i feel ready to give up....
 
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