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Mental Health Coming Off Invega Sustenna (Paliperidone) v.2

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Thanks steph! Lmao. Glad to know im not the only one with the pee issue too. the most annoying side wffects are the ones not listed- like gettig bruises that never heal, or zombie eyes
 
try cranberry juice for peeing too much, the more pure juice it is, the more effective it is. it's not just for UTI's anymore.

i've used the expensive stuff (Simply Cranberry Cocktail) because it's the only thing that worked for me. others have found the cheaper stuff to be just as effective.

i'm not a cheap date. :(
 
What the hell does that have to do with ?coming off invega sustenna?? Lets not pick apart any views on race... especially because u dont even know if @hateinvega is even black... im guessing his/her post is what sparked Ur post.
 
Alright sorry to bother you guys, but if u dont feel like reading a rant just ignore my post- ill make it short and sweet tho...

I just went on a diatribe, yelling af my parents who two years ago went and put me on a CTO. I get that i was psychotic but this injection ruined me. Not only does taking invega basically give u a non-surgical lobectpmy, your skin, your eyes, your immune system, everyrhing is affected. Im havingg one of those moments where im so mad i cant choose between killing myself or inflicting harm on everyone that led me to this shot (i never would do that, blah nlah blah, but what im getting at is im filled with hate).

I used to not have to work bc i would model, before all of this. NOW, even after losing rhe 70 pounds i gained. My body is not at all like it once was. My eyes dont photograph and basically dont even look passable as normal. My abdomen looks like a 4 year old rearranged my abs as if it was magnets on a fucking refridgerator, my thighs and calves arent sculpted like they once were, theyre muscular but they remind me of a prepubescent teenage girl?s musculature. NOT TO MENTION I HAVE TITS. Surgically i can fix the man boobs and extra skin i have but when i take my shirt off it just doesnt look attractive. I used to have a really attractive body now its just something u wouldnt even look at for more than a second at a pool. Im sorry if this sounds egotistical bur what im getting at is if my body, almost 10 months off the shot, hasnt returned to how it once was, finding work will be impossible, forget about the fact that i feel as ugly as i look in the mirror... i want to kill myself sometimes i hate it. And its an invega induced suicidal thoufht process not regular suicidal thoughts... i need this to be over, but im startinf to realize that i might not make it out of this hell looking the same as i used to. And thats basically shit. My countenance is not at ALL what it used to be. I hate my life. Im on the treadmill as we speak, currently walking, hoping i feel better. Tits jiggling and all... (u can laugh at all this idgaf im one of those people that can laugh when theyre in pain too, it just fucking sucks.) im 5?10 i weigh 140lbs and i have noticeable man boobs and abs that look like all the continents as they drifted apart on a map.

Does anybody know if the warped muscle tone goes away eventually? Like will i be able to have symmetrical muscle composure?

Also its kinda funny but i suggest everyone be aware of the fact that u can send literal animal poop to people thru a couple websites that offer the service online. If ur worried about anonymity they do accept bitcoin. If i dont feel better after this run im sending shit to the doctor that put me on this fucking shot.

Alright thanks for listening. Over and out.
 
Sounds bad, I hope the surgeries will remove the man boobs and loose skin.
Am I the only one who's suffered from anxiety, irritability and depression due to the withdrawal?
 
zack365 said:
Sounds bad, I hope the surgeries will remove the man boobs and loose skin.
Am I the only one who's suffered from anxiety, irritability and depression due to the withdrawal?
Click to expand...

No. I had all that. Most of it went away in the 6th month.
 
I had that issue too. The anxiety comes every now and then, almost like black-or-white thinking, right? Like ur missing the voice in ur head (absoluely no pun intended) that says ?its not the end of the world, stop tensing up?. The irritability i still have, every now and then, as u can tell by my previous post haha. Im almost at my 10th month. The depression i dont get thAt much tho. By month 7 the depression was gone.
 
Thanks..
I'm supposed to go back to school in a month and a half. I'll be off invega sustenna for 4 months. At least I am lucky I had only two doses, this drug is rubbish.
 
@zack365 good luck in school dude. I told myself id go back but my memory is still shot so if i did any classes that require test and stuff im screwed and itd be a waste of money for me. Maybe next semester tho.
 
@Boobahwho: it's different and how it is exactly different personally i wouldn't know, never had EST. i've done research on it in the past and met a few people who have had it in the last 20 years. it is safer than it use to be, not an option for everyone though. i can say that invega/xeplion is different from just about anything else including EST (but excluding abilify, zyprexa and haldol injections because they come very close) because invega shuts you down. EST does this but momentarily i've heard. some say it takes a day to recover from some weird side effects, some say it takes a matter of an hour or two, some say less or more. both are kinda along the same principle of correcting something in this fashion but one produces much better results and is typically easier for most people to go through, a much shorter recovery time.

it's like fixing a computer: EST is like installing a new program, running a security sweep and then restarting the computer. invega is like dismantling it piece by piece until you have cleaned and replaced every part but your not done yet. you still have to put it back together and work the code and programming one step at a time before a reset and your good again. one is electrical impulses coursing through your brain and one is a chemical that seeps into every cell in your body. other than that you gotta ask someone who has had EST and invega/xeplion injections. god help them if they had both and suffer.

towards the beginning of the v.2 or end of the v.1 thread it was tried by a few people. some found it alleviated symptoms for awhile, some found it didn't do anything at all. if you have the cash here in the states (idk about other countries) you can buy an at home version, there is also a way to go to a doctor or clinic and have it done. small amount of time on google can produce some options too.

to the room: this is going to be scary and dark and not everyone will go through this so you can skip reading this post to Hellohihey2. i think it is not only relevant to invega/xeplion to post this but also because this is a harm reduction site. otherwise i would be mindful and PM this to them.

@Hellohihey2: no worries, venting helps and is healthy. diatribe, excellent word usage. that's healthy too, i didn't do it to my parents at first but have two or three times of late. they have to take some responsibility even if they had the best of intentions. i could be wrong about that but i don't think i am. a natural reaction to pain is to scream out or at least wince at it. seeing a person like that lets them know something is definitely not right though most people don't understand that and can makes things worse by putting you on more meds or other ways. the point is it's feedback, not calm, rational and positive feedback but feedback none the less.

superficial or not, it doesn't matter. we all know what your going through. poison wreaks havoc on the brain and body. btw modeling is work, just not typical blue collar stuff, we're all not lucky enough to be one of the beautiful people, you seem pretty alright and not above the rest of us. you gotta pay the bills right.

that hate you have inside you is you but it's not what you think, it's the recovery process and it hits some harder than it does others. it's the natural hate inside you that is finally starting to feel like it always has. the poison is releasing it back to you finally. i'm happy for you, a good sign in healing. it's intense and scary but you will get through this. we need the negative emotions in us like fear, hate and depression to enjoy the positive ones like happy, excited and empathy. without the bad the good cannot exist or be so enjoyable in this life. it is the nature of human beings and this universe. otherwise life would be bland or we would be dead.

some of us have it really bad towards the end. that hate and confusion peaks or lasts for awhile. i tried to help HateInvega in seeing if that is what he is going through. undiminshed689 went through something similar as well. others have before too, they have all gotten through it and so will you. it's called losing your s**t. it doesn't happen to everyone but it does some. it's part of the comedown off drugs and psych meds sometimes. it's called PAWS, LTC, and withdrawal in general, those here who had psychotic breaks from drug usage and stuck on the poison can relate to this.

lately i've had at least one psychotic break every week, i constantly feel like losing my s**t and i'm tripping on a daily basis (i'm a negative exception remember, it wont be the same like this for anyone). it's almost border line psychosis and it's hard to hold it together, isn't it? the good news is this wont last much longer for you or anyone else who goes through it. the bad news is you can't reason your way out of it. it is a natural re-balancing of the chemicals in your brain as well as emotions, thoughts, behavior and perception. you were stuck in invega/xeplion time, the last of the poison is letting go of you and your moving back to real time. there is no easy way to go through this. sorry, i wish there was. the upside is the bad as well as the good and everything else is finding a natural homeostasis within you again. you gotta re-break and set a broken leg that has healed wrong in order for it to heal right and be used proper like again.

that is why we practice things during the trial like being mindful, distracting ourselves and being patient. why we talk with each other about what we go through so we can better recognize what is happening to us and understanding. it helps you to get you through this part. because like i said, you can't rationalize or think your way through this like a word problem or conflict with another person.

this might last a few hours, a day or maybe a few. it wont last forever. after this things will be much easier for you. the worse will definitely be over with. just like focusing on the healing first and everything else comes second, you need to focus on just getting past this part, not even the healing matters. you need to distract yourself, be safe, keep away from things that make it worse. you need to let your brain and body do the very hard part of the healing otherwise the more you try to control it the worse things will get. human beings have a thing about control, you need to let this part happen. this is going to be a test for you but we are all here if you need anything. i have faith you can get through this part. you just need to hunker down and let the storm pass.

it is always darkest before the dawn.

that being said there are pills, creams and surgeries you can get for the gynecomastia. you can also work out plus a lawsuit that might still be open i think. the problem your having with your physical self image is not your fault, it is part of what the poison has done to you. my suggestion is let it go until your healed. it's like a long, important road trip through a dangerous area and having car issues. unless the car breaks down right on the spot, you keep going. once you eek your car to the destination then you can stop and fix it. your body has served you well until this point, it has been pushed to a new limit and you can take care of it once you are fully healed. it wont quit on you yet. people have posted they are able to lose fat and work out again afterwards, most have lost the man boobies. there are things you can do after you are past this part. until then...

you can PM me with anything, even venting the worse and i wont judge you or tell anyone about it. i don't have to read it even, you can just vent in a safe place. you don't really want to hurt yourself or someone else. you feel wronged for what has been done to you but your reacting due to going through this part right now. i see you, you are still you and will see this for yourself once you are past this.

you and Steph78 are pretty close, hang in there and i look forward to reading both of your recovery posts soon.
 
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Boobahwho said:
Will all my old memories come roaring back when it's out of my system or does it have to leave the body for the brain to have the pleasure system
Click to expand...

Yes. It will b as if u never had the shot. U will b fine. Just takes time. Hang in there.
 
@Steph78: you ever get stiff muscles after stopping the injections? if so did it get better or go away?
 
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it's going to be ok Rosi. you can't see everything on a MRI or cat scan. good news is this doesn't last forever.

bad news is your stuck with me. run, run away, run as far away as you can. (<---is this funny or not funny Rosi?)

to the room: i feel like making love but my brain is so weak i'll get half way through and pass out. haha.

man this is taking forever. idk how you guys go through this for a year. oh wait, i do know. it's been 5 years.

"shut up invegauser, that's not funny." (i could do this all day ladies and germs. thank you, thank you. i'll be here all week. don't forget to tip your waitress.)

"HA! fake laugh hiding real pain."
 
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