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Mental Health Coming off Invega (Paliperidone, Xeplion) injections v 6.0

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Merek said:
I got this thought in the back of my head I’m gonna go insane again, lately for some reason I can’t stop thinking about my hospitalization and everything that happened to me and I get extremely angry and fearful when I think about it, I think it’s a sign of PTSD which invega may have been masking for a while, if any of you guys have PTSD how do you cope naturally? Ive tripped on LSD and it’s helped a little bit but it’s still bugging me a lot
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i do to but then i say jesus forgive me and he does
 
Merek said:
I got this thought in the back of my head I’m gonna go insane again, lately for some reason I can’t stop thinking about my hospitalization and everything that happened to me and I get extremely angry and fearful when I think about it, I think it’s a sign of PTSD which invega may have been masking for a while, if any of you guys have PTSD how do you cope naturally? Ive tripped on LSD and it’s helped a little bit but it’s still bugging me a lot.
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For me personally I think distracting myself with things like reading things online, video games, and playing with my dog helps a lot. Talking to my therapist and family and significant other helps as well to process the trauma.
 
Has anybody done EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy? My psychiatrist brought this up to me and recommended it at my last appointment. She said to ask my therapist about it to hook me up with it . So I was curious if anyone has ever done this and if it worked or helped .
 
RecoveryInProgress said:
For me personally I think distracting myself with things like reading things online, video games, and playing with my dog helps a lot. Talking to my therapist and family and significant other helps as well to process the trauma.
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Appreciate your input, I do have a therapist but I haven’t been seeing her much lately maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go more often, I feel like I never really fully express what I truly feel and think about though 1 cause I’m extremely uncomfortable with that idea and 2 I feel like if I said what I was really thinking my therapist would think I’d need to be hospitalized and medicated, what really goes through my mind sometimes is homicidal thoughts about some of the guards & doctors in the ward that treated people like animals and drugged them I wasn’t the only person in my psych ward struggling with medication side effects and you had to take meds or else they’d try putting you on CTO that whole process disgusts me and makes me wana kill those people. I obviously wouldn’t act on it but I think about it all the time and imagine what it would be like in my mind to do it sometimes I tell myself I’m sick in the head but another part of me tells myself it’s completely normal that I feel that way more often then not I tell myself it’s normal but at the end of the day I wouldn’t act on my thoughts.
 
Merek said:
Appreciate your input, I do have a therapist but I haven’t been seeing her much lately maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go more often, I feel like I never really fully express what I truly feel and think about though 1 cause I’m extremely uncomfortable with that idea and 2 I feel like if I said what I was really thinking my therapist would think I’d need to be hospitalized and medicated, what really goes through my mind sometimes is homicidal thoughts about some of the guards & doctors in the ward that treated people like animals and drugged them I wasn’t the only person in my psych ward struggling with medication side effects and you had to take meds or else they’d try putting you on CTO that whole process disgusts me and makes me wana kill those people. I obviously wouldn’t act on it but I think about it all the time and imagine what it would be like in my mind to do it sometimes I tell myself I’m sick in the head but another part of me tells myself it’s completely normal that I feel that way more often then not I tell myself it’s normal but at the end of the day I wouldn’t act on my thoughts.
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Glad my input was helpful! All of your thoughts and feelings are valid. If you don’t think you can share your thoughts and feelings with your therapist without being judged then maybe look into getting a different one. I think having someone that you trust and understands you will help like as long as you say like you have those thoughts and don’t want to act on them I don’t think they can put you in the hospital but if you do go to the therapist and say you do want to act on those feelings they can submit you. So it just depends on how you go about it. But yeah having a therapist that you trust will really help a lot.
 
I just recieved my blood test results and it shows shows some interesting, concerning, yet unsurprising details. So the previous results from months ago when I was excercising frequently and regulating my diet pre-invega showed that everything that was tested for such as certain enzymes and horomones were in an appropriate range. However the test post-invega shows that I have very elevated levels of cholesterol now, which can be caused by multiple factors but I feel like invega might play a role, that and possibly long term sleep deprivation, not to mention the fact that I stopped going to the gym, and the fact that I discontinued eating properly for some time after due to my severe depression from side effects. What's most concerning is my high levels of Alanine Aminotransferase (ALT), which is an enzyme mostly produced in the liver that in high concentrations like mine, is typically a sign of liver disease/damage which I think is caused by the multiple reasons I mentioned prior, but still believe invega is the biggest culprit here. Lastly, I have somewhat low levels of vitamin D3 but that has a simple solution, just gotta expose myself to the sun more frequently and take supplements. I hope other organs haven't been affected much...
 
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Merek said:
I got this thought in the back of my head I’m gonna go insane again, lately for some reason I can’t stop thinking about my hospitalization and everything that happened to me and I get extremely angry and fearful when I think about it, I think it’s a sign of PTSD which invega may have been masking for a while, if any of you guys have PTSD how do you cope naturally? Ive tripped on LSD and it’s helped a little bit but it’s still bugging me a lot.
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I've had some PTSD from my hospitilizations. It's just anxiety that you might go psycotic again and get injected. It will pass over time
 
loosewheelnut said:
I've had some PTSD from my hospitilizations. It's just anxiety that you might go psycotic again and get injected. It will pass over time
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If I think clearly the idea of going psychotic again and being re injected is very unlikely for me I just gotta try and distract myself and not think about it so much it’s hard to do lately though since I’ve been sick and kinda isolated.
 
Merek said:
If I think clearly the idea of going psychotic again and being re injected is very unlikely for me I just gotta try and distract myself and not think about it so much it’s hard to do lately though since I’ve been sick and kinda isolated.
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Yeh it can be depressing. Try to get out maybe find a job, that's what most people do during the week anyway and you end up socialising with your work mates and earn some cash. It'll also give you some fullfillment in life, im just starting to look for work today
 
I had a dream last night that I thought I needed re injected. It was more of a nightmare now that I’m awake. I would prolly kms if I had to go thru this again.
 
RecoveryInProgress said:
For me personally I think distracting myself with things like reading things online, video games, and playing with my dog helps a lot. Talking to my therapist and family and significant other helps as well to process the trauma.
Click to expand...
I agree that therapy really helps proces the feelings that come after going psychotic/through the system/off invega. They're really hard feelings to get a hold of on your own. If you don't feel like you're working through something important after a few sessions with your therapist, find a new one...some therapists are just waiting for their day to be over & don't really care, those are no good

A therapist can also help you have an action plan in place to let the ppl that meet you in crisis know that you don't consent to injection -- this can help ease your mind more than anything else
 
Merek said:
Appreciate your input, I do have a therapist but I haven’t been seeing her much lately maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go more often, I feel like I never really fully express what I truly feel and think about though 1 cause I’m extremely uncomfortable with that idea and 2 I feel like if I said what I was really thinking my therapist would think I’d need to be hospitalized and medicated, what really goes through my mind sometimes is homicidal thoughts about some of the guards & doctors in the ward that treated people like animals and drugged them I wasn’t the only person in my psych ward struggling with medication side effects and you had to take meds or else they’d try putting you on CTO that whole process disgusts me and makes me wana kill those people. I obviously wouldn’t act on it but I think about it all the time and imagine what it would be like in my mind to do it sometimes I tell myself I’m sick in the head but another part of me tells myself it’s completely normal that I feel that way more often then not I tell myself it’s normal but at the end of the day I wouldn’t act on my thoughts.
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I have revenge thoughts as well i know you shouldnt have that but that german psychiatrist dr brückner said i have to take These meds eben if i get suicidial. He added you didnt have well. Because of risperdal i had death fears and i completely freaked out i was yelling and crying so they put me in a protected closed Station where they said if i dont get this shot they ll put me under conservatorship. I was so astonished you guys have cto i didnt know a Country could do that to ppl. I mean you can die from cto but once you are in that hospital noone believes you anymore. All the other doctors think you are mentally ill and you need These meds. They treated me very Bad too. I was so mad that i called my ex psychiatrist and told him i wanna sue him and he laughed at me said you can do that. If you sue them they will call you sick in Front of the court. And if you are unlucky you may See the hospital again. So u cant even Sue these bastards
 
Merek said:
I got this thought in the back of my head I’m gonna go insane again, lately for some reason I can’t stop thinking about my hospitalization and everything that happened to me and I get extremely angry and fearful when I think about it, I think it’s a sign of PTSD which invega may have been masking for a while, if any of you guys have PTSD how do you cope naturally? Ive tripped on LSD and it’s helped a little bit but it’s still bugging me a lot.
Click to expand...
I have the same thought i am so scared they put me in psychiatry again. Who brought you there merek your parents
 
Merek said:
Appreciate your input, I do have a therapist but I haven’t been seeing her much lately maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go more often, I feel like I never really fully express what I truly feel and think about though 1 cause I’m extremely uncomfortable with that idea and 2 I feel like if I said what I was really thinking my therapist would think I’d need to be hospitalized and medicated, what really goes through my mind sometimes is homicidal thoughts about some of the guards & doctors in the ward that treated people like animals and drugged them I wasn’t the only person in my psych ward struggling with medication side effects and you had to take meds or else they’d try putting you on CTO that whole process disgusts me and makes me wana kill those people. I obviously wouldn’t act on it but I think about it all the time and imagine what it would be like in my mind to do it sometimes I tell myself I’m sick in the head but another part of me tells myself it’s completely normal that I feel that way more often then not I tell myself it’s normal but at the end of the day I wouldn’t act on my thoughts.
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I dont think you are sick merek you are a pretty normal guy
 
Im at the 8.5 month mark and honestly I'm struggling the most now, at least that's what it feels like. I've got a lot of my creativity back, I can make art again, and I can make conversation and have some somewhat intelligent thought. But I have 0 tolerance to cold, mad anxious, and having a hard time getting out of bed. Is this normal? Cbd helps a little but not a lot.
 
NoMoreInvegaPls said:
Im at the 8.5 month mark and honestly I'm struggling the most now, at least that's what it feels like. I've got a lot of my creativity back, I can make art again, and I can make conversation and have some somewhat intelligent thought. But I have 0 tolerance to cold, mad anxious, and having a hard time getting out of bed. Is this normal? Cbd helps a little but not a lot.
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Im not sure because im at month 1.5 but might take 2 full years to get back to normal
 
NoMoreInvegaPls said:
Im at the 8.5 month mark and honestly I'm struggling the most now, at least that's what it feels like. I've got a lot of my creativity back, I can make art again, and I can make conversation and have some somewhat intelligent thought. But I have 0 tolerance to cold, mad anxious, and having a hard time getting out of bed. Is this normal? Cbd helps a little but not a lot.
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Have you recovered your emotions or no
 
ive been completely getting off on APs and I feel like death. literally like im dying. I hate all the side effects, ive tried 10 medications. but I feel like im finally reaching a plateau that if I continue a little longer, I will be fine again
 
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