Cocaine/crack - Experienced - Auto-Pilot

[Synthetic_Chaos]

Cocaine is the most deceptive bitch I have ever met. I am able to stay away from her as long as I do not have the expendable cash to dispose of or hang out with a certain few people I am friends with who indulge in the shit every fucking weekend (as I used to do myself!) IN fact, when she used to come around on welcomed occasions, I enjoyed smelling her intoxicating scent and still do to this day. The only problem is, I learned how to make the smell into an oral fixation. Okay, time to drop the analogies.....

There was a time I could buy cocaine HCL and enjoy it the way it is supposed to be enjoyed. You know, if at a party, a way to open yourself up more than you normally would be. Even if at home alone or with a couple of close friends, researching anything in the world that came to mind or compose any musical ideas that came to mind...sensory bliss! Cocaine used to be a true inspiration motivator.

Then I learned how to rock the shit up.......

No, not mass quantities, just gram by gram. When once an eight of powder was most sufficient to snort exclusively, most of it now ends up being "rocked" up. The first time I did it I was nervous I'd waste the precious powder. When I soon perfected the process, it was as if I became some sort of a ghetto scientist. I was fucking THRILLED!!! I LOVED the whole conversion of it all. Rather, I love the whole conversion process of it all. I really enjoy making just the right ratio of powder, sodium bicarb and water heating it up just right and shocking it at just the right time and seeing that solid chunk almost form right before your eyes. Science has always amazed me and this relatively simple process in my casual coke use has pretty much ruined the whole deal.

I LOOOOOVVVEEE the taste, smell, smoke and exhallation of the finished product.

Suddenly it's a different story, though. Finished product usually ensues MAJOR paranoia. I don't give a fuck what anyone says, even the best of cocaine in freebase has the same conclusion. Paranoia of some sort prevails...Smoking it ends up in instant paranoia, UNlike powder form.

Why is it that I know this is the result but STILL insist on cooking this shit up no matter how hard I say I will not do as such??? Willpower is not an acceptable answer...

 

[Sandbag]

I can sympathize; some of the most traumatic moments of my life have been due to IV meth and regardless of how hard I've tried to get some and *just* smoke it I almost always end up shooting at least once per bag...

 

[alcoholic333]

smoking rock is pretty fucked to watch friends do. I used to do coke every weekend and have smoked it maybe twice but now I won't do a single hit or bump no matter how drunk or sober I am. Sometimes I'll just be drinking beer with a couple buddies and they decide to get a half ball of coke, they cook it up all excited. Then smoke it and a minute later everyones worried about walking infront of windows, thinking somebodys hiding a hit somewhere, and just a general feeling of uneasiness.

 

[Synthetic_Chaos]

Then smoke it and a minute later everyones worried about walking infront of windows, thinking somebodys hiding a hit somewhere, and just a general feeling of uneasiness.

haha, yeah that about sums it up. I don't think I could ever do it in a social setting. I don't even like doing it alone, paranoid in my own house! It's rediculous but, like I said, I get stupid when I have a decent quantity. Also, I think I posted this in the wrong forum, I apologize.

 

[Xorkoth]

No, this pretty much sounds like a trip report to me. However, I did change the name of it to conform to the standards of the Trip Reports forum.