PuristLove
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2000
- Messages
- 1,694
Chapter 1
She smelled smoke. Something in the house was burning. Getting up from her chair in the living room she half-ran down the hall and into the kitchen.
"I've ruined it," she said as she glanced at the clock above the stove. She'd left the casserole in for too long. "Just my luck."
Turning off the oven and reaching for the fan, she yelled for her children, "Kids, come here."
Stacey her eldest ran into the kitchen, "What stinks mom?"
"That's your dinner," Celeste told her.
"Yuck mom, you burned it again?" the twelve year old asked.
"Yeah, now go ask your brother if he wants pizza. I don't have time to cook anything else," she told her.
"Mmmm…Pizza," the girl said as she ran down the hall. "Mikey, mom's gonna order us pizza!"
Celeste sank down into one of the folding chairs that surrounded the card table. She didn't have the money for pizza but if she cooked again she'd be running too late to go. And she needed to go tonight. Her soul felt like it had been ripped from her body, twisted in a knot and shoved back inside her. If she didn't get some healing she wouldn't be able to go on anymore.
"Mommy, can we have mushrooms on it," Mikey, her eight year old asked her.
"That's fine sweetie," she told him.
"Mushrooms, icky," Stacey crossed her arms and stared hard at her brother.
"I'll order them on just half," Celeste tried to reason with her daughter.
"But then the mushroom juice will leak over onto my half. I'll still be able to taste it," the little girl whined.
"Fine, I'll order two pizzas," she told her. Like I can afford one pizza, she thought to herself.
She dialed the pizza place and placed her order.
"They'll be here in half an hour. I'll leave the check on the table, just give it to them when they come," she told her children.
"You're not gonna be here?" Mikey asked.
"No Mommy has a meeting tonight," she said.
"But it's Friday mom," he pouted.
"I know but I really need to go. I can't explain it," she frowned. The kids never let her out the door without a fight. It wasn't that she didn't want to spend time with them, but how do you explain the needs of the soul and body to children?
Mikey's eyes squinted shut and his face turned red. He fought it for a second but the tears won and began to come down his cheeks.
"Mikey, what's wrong? You know I'll be home soon," she said.
"But Mom, you promised," he sobbed. His little body was shaking as he cried.
Damn, the Space Commando movie.
"Mikey, I know I promised we'd watch Space Commando's tonight. That's why your gonna stay up until I get home. I was gonna set the VCR to tape it. We'll have a special midnight viewing, just me and you," she reached out her arms to the boy.
He flung himself into them for a hug. "I can stay up until you get home?"
"Yes, Mikey. You and Stacey both," she smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Now Mommy needs to get ready. You wanna look up the time and channel of the movie?"
"It's 7:00 on channel 37," he said.
"Oh, you knew?" she teased him.
"Of course I did. It's Space Commando's mom," he laughed at her.
She smiled. It was so good to see him laugh, since their father had left there had been little enough of happiness between the three of them.
Heading upstairs to her room took more energy than she thought she had. If she was going to get anything out of tonight she would need a cup of coffee. The week's drain on her body had been more than usual. Now that electricity was rationed it took twice as much effort to get anything done. The computers were only used when necessary now, which meant secretaries like her didn't get to use them.
Celeste removed her skirt and blouse, exchanged the support-bra for a t-shirt and slipped a pair of sweatpants on. At least she could be comfortable.
The chest at the foot of her bed had a lock on it. Using the key that dangled from a yellow ribbon around her neck, she opened it up and smiled. Lying on top was deep blue cloth. The others had chosen black, but she wore the midnight blue. It was so much prettier and in the darkness none of them could tell. It suited her to know she kept a secret, and the blue she wore marked her apart from the others that she worshipped with.
When she had unwrapped the robe and pulled it over her head she felt sexy and mysterious, all of her previous tiredness was gone.
The Circle was all that kept her going. If she hadn't found them right before Blake left her she would never have survived the loneliness and pain that she confronted every day. Without Wicca she'd have slit her wrists months ago.
And tonight! Tonight she was to lead the invocation. It was an honor to be chosen for this. She would Draw Down the Moon with a prayer she had written. She would be the one to bring Her grace to them all.
Taking from the chest everything she would need she tucked the implements into the deep pockets in the robe.
Halfway out the door she remembered. "Space Commandos," she said under her breath. Running into the living room she yelled for Mikey again, "What time is Space Commandos again, and what channel?"
"Seven o'clock, channel thirty-seven," his monotone voice showed that he was clearly displeased with her for forgetting.
"Sorry, sheesh," she said as she popped in the tape and set it up to record.
"Bye kids, I'll be home before midnight," she yelled behind her as she pushed the screen door open with her shoulder.
The drive there was short, and went by in a blur. Her thoughts kept tumbling back on themselves. Excitement about her part in tonight's ritual and nagging worries about money looping through her mind in some strange dance.
It all faded away when she pulled into the parking lot at the abandoned baseball diamond they used for their ceremonies. Already the sun was setting in the sky and the heavens had taken on the same rich blue color that she clothed herself in.
"Celeste!" her friend Diana yelled at her from her own car.
"Diana, you're here early," she yelled back as she rolled down the window of her car.
"I always come early. I'll take all the time away from Rick and the boy's that I can get," she said. Both of them laughed.
Celeste looked over at her friend. Diana was beautiful where she was not. Diana had rich auburn hair that hung all the way to her ass, perky breasts, and green eyes that ranged from grey to blue depending on her mood. Celeste hair was at her shoulders, boring mousy brown and too straight, her tits sagged and her eyes were dull and generally bloodshot or rimmed with black circles. She wondered for a moment if Blake would have stayed with her if she looked like Diana.
But tonight wasn't a night for jealousy. She got out of her car and met her friend in the middle of the parking lot for a hug.
"You're not wearing black," she said. It wasn't noticeable from a distance, but up close it was obvious that Diana's robe was a shade of forest green.
"Neither are you. I suspect none of the girl's wear black, at least not all the time. But don't worry, you're secrets safe with me," she smiled at her.
Celeste was surprised that she didn't feel let down. She'd relished the idea that she could be dangerous here, rebel a little, but now she realized that this was just another part of what she loved about her Circle. Here she could always be whoever she wanted to be.
They sat on the hood of Diana's car, chatting idly while they waited for the rest of Circle to show up.
The others came one at a time. Either they joined Diana and Celeste to talk, or sat in their cars to meditate before the ritual.
By the time everyone was there Celeste was overflowing with nervous energy. She was both terrified and overjoyed. Perhaps tonight she'd even feel something, something more than the boost in self-esteem she always felt after a Coven Meeting.
"Celeste, are you ready?"Julie, their High Priestess asked.
"Yes, I'm ready," she shook her head as if to clear away the thoughts and walked briskly over to the area where they always formed their circle.
The black sky looked glossed over, as if the Goddess had spread a clear lacquer over it, deepening its darkness and brightening the jeweled stars and moon that rested in it.
The others came then, joining her and forming the ring that was their Circle.
When all were standing there she looked around and took a deep breath. "In unity we form a circle with our body's, hearts and souls."
She turned to face the person beside her and all of them turned with her. Slowly they began to walk around the edge of the invisible ring.
"In unity we ward this circle with our courage, love and honor."
As she said this she removed the silver wand from her pocket and let it dangle from its hand. It pointed outward, drawing the circle around them.
"In unity we ask for the strength of all good things; those that walk the earth, swim the seas, brave the fires, and fly the air."
From one of her other pockets she removed the incense and lighter. It was tricky to get it lit with one hand, but she had practiced and so she managed. When it was done she passed it to the person behind her. It would travel around the circle as an offering to all the spirits that assisted them tonight.
"In unity we ask the blessing of Sun Father, that he watch over our ritual from his palace of light, as we seek his Consort Moon Mother."
She'd timed her words so that as she finished she had come full circle in her walking. Now, standing where she'd started she turned back to face the center of the circle.
"In unity we pray that all good spirits may enter our circle, and all evil left outside. Inside the circle none with intentions fueled by hate, anger or malevolence may enter."
She knelt to the earth and kissed it. The others followed suit. While she'd based her ritual on the many others that had been performed here, hers was completely her own. None knew entirely what to expect.
"So mote it be," she said aloud, looking up to the heavens.
"So mote it be," the rest of them repeated in unison.
Now it was time and for a moment the nervousness filled her again. If she faltered here she would embarrass herself. Then a peace washed through her and she arose and stepped into the center of the circle.
She grasped her wand more tightly and lifted both arms to the sky. Taking a brief pause to gather the words, she looked up at the moon, now about a third of the way through the heavens.
Wise mother, hear my call
Fill me with your depth
Fertile Mother, I give myl all
Lend to me your passion
Huntress Mother, I beseech
Grant me all your strength
Maiden Mother, thee I seek
Impart on me your youth
Moon Mother, Holy Creator
I come to you in love
I invoke all that you are
To make me your abode
Grace me with your presence
So that I may know true bliss
All that I am belongs to you
Your humble servant, Celeste
She poured her heart into the prayer. The words rose from her body and into the night, imbued with a life of their own.
Standing there, words spoken, Celeste felt empty and hollow. It was as if she'd given everything that she was over to the Moon Goddess and would not be able to get it back without the Goddess's blessing.
It seemed like an eternity that she stood there, staring at the moon. Inside she felt that nothing would happen and she'd soon be finishing the rite. Then they'd all change into the spare clothes they'd brought and go somewhere for a beer.
But as she waited, something inside her changed. The emptiness grew deeper and she realized how truly alone she was. Slowly, her awareness of the rest of the Circle faded away. Suddenly she glanced around, frightened by the sensation.
What she saw frightened her even more. No longer was she in the familiar field. The world that surrounded her was some alien place, stark and drained of color. It was not grass beneath her feet but dust. The companions that formed the circle around her were no longer living, breathing flesh but stone images. The world she knew had been ripped away from her, replaced by one that was utterly unrecognizable.
When she tried to run away she found that she could not. Invisible hands held her in place. Then she felt something tugging on her head. Her neck was snapped back into place, suddenly rigid. Her vision was fixed on the moon again, completely against her will.
A thin trail of silver light began to work its way toward her. Like life had slowed down to the pace of the mountains, she watched light travel. Tiny particles of moondust glittered at the edges of the beam.
It drew toward her and curved itself elegantly at her feet. And then she saw it. A figure made its way down the light beam, walking along it as easily as a person crossed a bridge.
Tiny delicate feet carried a slender body down the moonbeam path. Celeste strained to make out the features, her heart pounding with fear inside her breast. The woman who approached her was silver like the shimmering moondust. Her eyes were sparkling coins that gleamed from her face with pale fire. Gaze resting on Celeste, she approached with the grace of a softly descending feather.
The panic inside quieted and Celeste was filled with gentle ease. The world no longer was a place of alien fear but stark beauty instead. It seemed that all the garish adornments had been stripped away and she could finally see the wonder that lay beneath it.
After a length of time that stretched beyond counting the woman came to a stop before Celeste. Looking into her eyes, Celeste knew with certainty that she stood before the Goddess. Neither of them spoke nor moved, caught in that instant of stillness like two creatures meeting in the forest.
There was so much she wanted to say and the silent waiting made her uneasy. But the words could not find their way to her lips.
With slow, delicate precision the Moon Goddess leaned forward. Her breath was the frost that comes before the spring thaw and it chilled Celeste's face. Where it touched her she felt her whole body tingling.
The Goddess came even closer until her lips rested on Celeste's forehead. Her kiss was warm and tender and Celeste would have shivered if she could. It was an ecstasy to be touched so, caressed by something so sweet and loving. She could feel creation itself flowing from her head down into her body, life blooming forth where before there had been nothingness.
Lips touched her ears and whispered, "You have been chosen."
Celeste wanted to speak, to say thank you. But her mouth would not move and even the tears of joy that hid behind her eyes refused to come forth.
Turning slowly, like a ballerina's pirouette, the Moon Goddess climbed back to the moon. Before she had even reached it Celeste found herself drifting away. Sleep enclosed her and all she knew was silvery light and the gentle peace that filled her heart.
[ 12 June 2002: Message edited by: PuristLove ]
She smelled smoke. Something in the house was burning. Getting up from her chair in the living room she half-ran down the hall and into the kitchen.
"I've ruined it," she said as she glanced at the clock above the stove. She'd left the casserole in for too long. "Just my luck."
Turning off the oven and reaching for the fan, she yelled for her children, "Kids, come here."
Stacey her eldest ran into the kitchen, "What stinks mom?"
"That's your dinner," Celeste told her.
"Yuck mom, you burned it again?" the twelve year old asked.
"Yeah, now go ask your brother if he wants pizza. I don't have time to cook anything else," she told her.
"Mmmm…Pizza," the girl said as she ran down the hall. "Mikey, mom's gonna order us pizza!"
Celeste sank down into one of the folding chairs that surrounded the card table. She didn't have the money for pizza but if she cooked again she'd be running too late to go. And she needed to go tonight. Her soul felt like it had been ripped from her body, twisted in a knot and shoved back inside her. If she didn't get some healing she wouldn't be able to go on anymore.
"Mommy, can we have mushrooms on it," Mikey, her eight year old asked her.
"That's fine sweetie," she told him.
"Mushrooms, icky," Stacey crossed her arms and stared hard at her brother.
"I'll order them on just half," Celeste tried to reason with her daughter.
"But then the mushroom juice will leak over onto my half. I'll still be able to taste it," the little girl whined.
"Fine, I'll order two pizzas," she told her. Like I can afford one pizza, she thought to herself.
She dialed the pizza place and placed her order.
"They'll be here in half an hour. I'll leave the check on the table, just give it to them when they come," she told her children.
"You're not gonna be here?" Mikey asked.
"No Mommy has a meeting tonight," she said.
"But it's Friday mom," he pouted.
"I know but I really need to go. I can't explain it," she frowned. The kids never let her out the door without a fight. It wasn't that she didn't want to spend time with them, but how do you explain the needs of the soul and body to children?
Mikey's eyes squinted shut and his face turned red. He fought it for a second but the tears won and began to come down his cheeks.
"Mikey, what's wrong? You know I'll be home soon," she said.
"But Mom, you promised," he sobbed. His little body was shaking as he cried.
Damn, the Space Commando movie.
"Mikey, I know I promised we'd watch Space Commando's tonight. That's why your gonna stay up until I get home. I was gonna set the VCR to tape it. We'll have a special midnight viewing, just me and you," she reached out her arms to the boy.
He flung himself into them for a hug. "I can stay up until you get home?"
"Yes, Mikey. You and Stacey both," she smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Now Mommy needs to get ready. You wanna look up the time and channel of the movie?"
"It's 7:00 on channel 37," he said.
"Oh, you knew?" she teased him.
"Of course I did. It's Space Commando's mom," he laughed at her.
She smiled. It was so good to see him laugh, since their father had left there had been little enough of happiness between the three of them.
Heading upstairs to her room took more energy than she thought she had. If she was going to get anything out of tonight she would need a cup of coffee. The week's drain on her body had been more than usual. Now that electricity was rationed it took twice as much effort to get anything done. The computers were only used when necessary now, which meant secretaries like her didn't get to use them.
Celeste removed her skirt and blouse, exchanged the support-bra for a t-shirt and slipped a pair of sweatpants on. At least she could be comfortable.
The chest at the foot of her bed had a lock on it. Using the key that dangled from a yellow ribbon around her neck, she opened it up and smiled. Lying on top was deep blue cloth. The others had chosen black, but she wore the midnight blue. It was so much prettier and in the darkness none of them could tell. It suited her to know she kept a secret, and the blue she wore marked her apart from the others that she worshipped with.
When she had unwrapped the robe and pulled it over her head she felt sexy and mysterious, all of her previous tiredness was gone.
The Circle was all that kept her going. If she hadn't found them right before Blake left her she would never have survived the loneliness and pain that she confronted every day. Without Wicca she'd have slit her wrists months ago.
And tonight! Tonight she was to lead the invocation. It was an honor to be chosen for this. She would Draw Down the Moon with a prayer she had written. She would be the one to bring Her grace to them all.
Taking from the chest everything she would need she tucked the implements into the deep pockets in the robe.
Halfway out the door she remembered. "Space Commandos," she said under her breath. Running into the living room she yelled for Mikey again, "What time is Space Commandos again, and what channel?"
"Seven o'clock, channel thirty-seven," his monotone voice showed that he was clearly displeased with her for forgetting.
"Sorry, sheesh," she said as she popped in the tape and set it up to record.
"Bye kids, I'll be home before midnight," she yelled behind her as she pushed the screen door open with her shoulder.
The drive there was short, and went by in a blur. Her thoughts kept tumbling back on themselves. Excitement about her part in tonight's ritual and nagging worries about money looping through her mind in some strange dance.
It all faded away when she pulled into the parking lot at the abandoned baseball diamond they used for their ceremonies. Already the sun was setting in the sky and the heavens had taken on the same rich blue color that she clothed herself in.
"Celeste!" her friend Diana yelled at her from her own car.
"Diana, you're here early," she yelled back as she rolled down the window of her car.
"I always come early. I'll take all the time away from Rick and the boy's that I can get," she said. Both of them laughed.
Celeste looked over at her friend. Diana was beautiful where she was not. Diana had rich auburn hair that hung all the way to her ass, perky breasts, and green eyes that ranged from grey to blue depending on her mood. Celeste hair was at her shoulders, boring mousy brown and too straight, her tits sagged and her eyes were dull and generally bloodshot or rimmed with black circles. She wondered for a moment if Blake would have stayed with her if she looked like Diana.
But tonight wasn't a night for jealousy. She got out of her car and met her friend in the middle of the parking lot for a hug.
"You're not wearing black," she said. It wasn't noticeable from a distance, but up close it was obvious that Diana's robe was a shade of forest green.
"Neither are you. I suspect none of the girl's wear black, at least not all the time. But don't worry, you're secrets safe with me," she smiled at her.
Celeste was surprised that she didn't feel let down. She'd relished the idea that she could be dangerous here, rebel a little, but now she realized that this was just another part of what she loved about her Circle. Here she could always be whoever she wanted to be.
They sat on the hood of Diana's car, chatting idly while they waited for the rest of Circle to show up.
The others came one at a time. Either they joined Diana and Celeste to talk, or sat in their cars to meditate before the ritual.
By the time everyone was there Celeste was overflowing with nervous energy. She was both terrified and overjoyed. Perhaps tonight she'd even feel something, something more than the boost in self-esteem she always felt after a Coven Meeting.
"Celeste, are you ready?"Julie, their High Priestess asked.
"Yes, I'm ready," she shook her head as if to clear away the thoughts and walked briskly over to the area where they always formed their circle.
The black sky looked glossed over, as if the Goddess had spread a clear lacquer over it, deepening its darkness and brightening the jeweled stars and moon that rested in it.
The others came then, joining her and forming the ring that was their Circle.
When all were standing there she looked around and took a deep breath. "In unity we form a circle with our body's, hearts and souls."
She turned to face the person beside her and all of them turned with her. Slowly they began to walk around the edge of the invisible ring.
"In unity we ward this circle with our courage, love and honor."
As she said this she removed the silver wand from her pocket and let it dangle from its hand. It pointed outward, drawing the circle around them.
"In unity we ask for the strength of all good things; those that walk the earth, swim the seas, brave the fires, and fly the air."
From one of her other pockets she removed the incense and lighter. It was tricky to get it lit with one hand, but she had practiced and so she managed. When it was done she passed it to the person behind her. It would travel around the circle as an offering to all the spirits that assisted them tonight.
"In unity we ask the blessing of Sun Father, that he watch over our ritual from his palace of light, as we seek his Consort Moon Mother."
She'd timed her words so that as she finished she had come full circle in her walking. Now, standing where she'd started she turned back to face the center of the circle.
"In unity we pray that all good spirits may enter our circle, and all evil left outside. Inside the circle none with intentions fueled by hate, anger or malevolence may enter."
She knelt to the earth and kissed it. The others followed suit. While she'd based her ritual on the many others that had been performed here, hers was completely her own. None knew entirely what to expect.
"So mote it be," she said aloud, looking up to the heavens.
"So mote it be," the rest of them repeated in unison.
Now it was time and for a moment the nervousness filled her again. If she faltered here she would embarrass herself. Then a peace washed through her and she arose and stepped into the center of the circle.
She grasped her wand more tightly and lifted both arms to the sky. Taking a brief pause to gather the words, she looked up at the moon, now about a third of the way through the heavens.
Wise mother, hear my call
Fill me with your depth
Fertile Mother, I give myl all
Lend to me your passion
Huntress Mother, I beseech
Grant me all your strength
Maiden Mother, thee I seek
Impart on me your youth
Moon Mother, Holy Creator
I come to you in love
I invoke all that you are
To make me your abode
Grace me with your presence
So that I may know true bliss
All that I am belongs to you
Your humble servant, Celeste
She poured her heart into the prayer. The words rose from her body and into the night, imbued with a life of their own.
Standing there, words spoken, Celeste felt empty and hollow. It was as if she'd given everything that she was over to the Moon Goddess and would not be able to get it back without the Goddess's blessing.
It seemed like an eternity that she stood there, staring at the moon. Inside she felt that nothing would happen and she'd soon be finishing the rite. Then they'd all change into the spare clothes they'd brought and go somewhere for a beer.
But as she waited, something inside her changed. The emptiness grew deeper and she realized how truly alone she was. Slowly, her awareness of the rest of the Circle faded away. Suddenly she glanced around, frightened by the sensation.
What she saw frightened her even more. No longer was she in the familiar field. The world that surrounded her was some alien place, stark and drained of color. It was not grass beneath her feet but dust. The companions that formed the circle around her were no longer living, breathing flesh but stone images. The world she knew had been ripped away from her, replaced by one that was utterly unrecognizable.
When she tried to run away she found that she could not. Invisible hands held her in place. Then she felt something tugging on her head. Her neck was snapped back into place, suddenly rigid. Her vision was fixed on the moon again, completely against her will.
A thin trail of silver light began to work its way toward her. Like life had slowed down to the pace of the mountains, she watched light travel. Tiny particles of moondust glittered at the edges of the beam.
It drew toward her and curved itself elegantly at her feet. And then she saw it. A figure made its way down the light beam, walking along it as easily as a person crossed a bridge.
Tiny delicate feet carried a slender body down the moonbeam path. Celeste strained to make out the features, her heart pounding with fear inside her breast. The woman who approached her was silver like the shimmering moondust. Her eyes were sparkling coins that gleamed from her face with pale fire. Gaze resting on Celeste, she approached with the grace of a softly descending feather.
The panic inside quieted and Celeste was filled with gentle ease. The world no longer was a place of alien fear but stark beauty instead. It seemed that all the garish adornments had been stripped away and she could finally see the wonder that lay beneath it.
After a length of time that stretched beyond counting the woman came to a stop before Celeste. Looking into her eyes, Celeste knew with certainty that she stood before the Goddess. Neither of them spoke nor moved, caught in that instant of stillness like two creatures meeting in the forest.
There was so much she wanted to say and the silent waiting made her uneasy. But the words could not find their way to her lips.
With slow, delicate precision the Moon Goddess leaned forward. Her breath was the frost that comes before the spring thaw and it chilled Celeste's face. Where it touched her she felt her whole body tingling.
The Goddess came even closer until her lips rested on Celeste's forehead. Her kiss was warm and tender and Celeste would have shivered if she could. It was an ecstasy to be touched so, caressed by something so sweet and loving. She could feel creation itself flowing from her head down into her body, life blooming forth where before there had been nothingness.
Lips touched her ears and whispered, "You have been chosen."
Celeste wanted to speak, to say thank you. But her mouth would not move and even the tears of joy that hid behind her eyes refused to come forth.
Turning slowly, like a ballerina's pirouette, the Moon Goddess climbed back to the moon. Before she had even reached it Celeste found herself drifting away. Sleep enclosed her and all she knew was silvery light and the gentle peace that filled her heart.
[ 12 June 2002: Message edited by: PuristLove ]
