I just did a shot of some real good smack, I'm feeling fucking great right now. The stack of medical bills upstairs and my current job status are finally not on my mind. I've been stressing about them ever since I got back from camping this weekend which by the way, was a great vacation. I almost didn't go because I didn't have the money for pitch but decided I could spare a bag of dope and go have some real fun with friends up in the mountains. I still got dope of course (can't have much fun when you are sick), but only a half a gram instead of a whole one.
The trip was real nice, I enjoyed it a lot. I don't have much social interaction with people so this was a nice change. The whole trip was for my cousins friend Jessie's birthday so everyone was drinking every night making things interesting...almost too interesting and let me elaborate a little more on that topic. My cousin Jackie and my cousins friend Adrian are sort of "friends with benefits" at least that is what I would call it as much as she disputes it. I was hoping that the both of them finally got that fact that they could never be together in their head but apparently I was wrong. On the first night the two of them vanished for awhile from the camp fire and then when they got back you could tell something happened because they were being awfully close to each other and then when they went to bed it happened.
They were fucking in his car, now...don't get me wrong, it doesn't bother me but I don't want to hear what my cousin sounds like when she is fucking...I couldn't imagine anyone would want to know what that sounds like. I went for a walk and did a shot of heroin behind my cousins car where no one could see me then I started thinking. You know. She is just setting herself up for another heartbreak, she wants commitment from a guy who won't ever fucking give it to her and I just wish she could accept that and try to find the "right" guy. Even now I know she has to be upset because I know she isn't talking to him and won't see him for another year...how could someone give themselves up like for one night and be ok with it? I don't understand it...
The trip was real nice, I enjoyed it a lot. I don't have much social interaction with people so this was a nice change. The whole trip was for my cousins friend Jessie's birthday so everyone was drinking every night making things interesting...almost too interesting and let me elaborate a little more on that topic. My cousin Jackie and my cousins friend Adrian are sort of "friends with benefits" at least that is what I would call it as much as she disputes it. I was hoping that the both of them finally got that fact that they could never be together in their head but apparently I was wrong. On the first night the two of them vanished for awhile from the camp fire and then when they got back you could tell something happened because they were being awfully close to each other and then when they went to bed it happened.
They were fucking in his car, now...don't get me wrong, it doesn't bother me but I don't want to hear what my cousin sounds like when she is fucking...I couldn't imagine anyone would want to know what that sounds like. I went for a walk and did a shot of heroin behind my cousins car where no one could see me then I started thinking. You know. She is just setting herself up for another heartbreak, she wants commitment from a guy who won't ever fucking give it to her and I just wish she could accept that and try to find the "right" guy. Even now I know she has to be upset because I know she isn't talking to him and won't see him for another year...how could someone give themselves up like for one night and be ok with it? I don't understand it...