Big Brother

[buzzn_all_nite_long]

According To My Brother
I Do Not Exist
He Doesn’t Want To Tell Anyone
About His Little Sis

He’s Embarrassed By Me
For An Unknown Reason
I Bet He Wouldn’t Care
If I Stopped Breathing

Im Nothing To Him
He Doesn’t Want Me Around
Im Just Another Person
Who Lives In His Town

I Mean Why Would He Care
I Just Grew Up With The Guy
He Will Never Acknowledge Me
No Matter How Hard I Try

I Shouldn’t Worry So Much
Well That’s What People Have Said
But No One Realises
How Much It Fucks With My Head

Mum Says He Loves Me
He’s Just Showing It His Way
“I’m Proud Of You Jess”
That’s One Thing He’ll Never Say

I Cry A Lot Because Of Him
The Way That He Treats Me
To Brad Im The Embarrassment
Of The Family

I Just Want Him To Accept Me
As His Own Flesh And Blood
Instead Of Putting Me Down
Rubbing My Face In The Mud


Luv Jessi Miller 03/05/2004

 

[Raz]

been there....in fact I pretty much spent 24 years there. If it's any consolation, for most of my life I didn't think my brother and I would ever have anything like a decent relationship, and we didn't even talk to each other at all for 4 years. But he finally realised what his being an asshat was costing him in life, and now we have the best relationship we've ever had.

So I guess the point of all that was never underestimate people's ability to change...but it's probably not much consolation in the meantime, so I'll just say that at least I know how ya feel luv..

 

[froggygirl]

I've always had a great relationship with my brother.
I'm sorry to see that yours hurts you so much. I agree with Raz though, never underestimate people's ability to change.
I like the poem too. Great work.

 

[RareForm]

I can feel the emotion flowing through this poem and relate to it oh so well. I have 5 brothers and I can't say that I've ever been close to any of them...it seems like just recently that we are all accepting the fact the we do love each other and we do mean alot to each other...

I came to this sudden realization when my eldest brother has recently came from up north to visit..I was so excited, but I also remembered how I always used to have something against him for some reason...I didn't know how to act...but i know now ..quite well..

He will come around for you sooner than later...

Just keep your head up..