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Best friend said her boyfriend hits her

Talk her into filing a police report next time he abuses her
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Wrong way to go about it , sorry to say. The head of education said a similar thing to my dad when i was about 14
"what you need to do is let the kids at school who are bullying him, beat him up bad then you will be able to get a crime reference number"

To OP,
Your friend sounds in danger, and this guy sounds like an A hole. She needs to get out of this relationship things could turn much worse.
 
Don't get involved in this mess, and definitely don't become foolish enough to get into a physical altercation with him.
Jail time, court time, and stiff penalty fee's just aren't worth it.
If she's still with him after all that abuse, it means she still see's value in him for an unknown reason.
The best you can do is tell her to wisen up about her own decisions.
 
Tech Kinetics said:
If she's still with him after all that abuse, it means she still see's value in him for an unknown reason.
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It doesn't necessarily mean she see's value in him. It could mean that she doesn't have much self-esteem and doesn't have the initiative to move into a better situation.
Who knows....I know I'd never think twice about leaving someone who abused me. I don't know why it's hard for girls like this...not listening to their gut...the same old problem...the sooner she trusts her gut the better off she'll be, not just in this situation either. But this situation is ridiculous to let continue.

You should shake her, don't be self-righteous at all, just be like "YO!!! WTF are you doing girl?!? You realize life is short right? You realize that we're all gonna die some day right? Time is precious! Don't waste it with this moron! You got WAY better things you could be doing than allowing yourself to fall into this loser's little hole he dug himself into!"

That'd make me wanna stop being stupid pretty quick. Remind her that she doesn't need to take shit from ANYbody, in case she forgot.
 
It'd be hard to get much worse...
Tell her that bluelight agrees that this guy is a total loser, and that's the verdict from an internet message board full of druggies lol. Tell her we gave her permission to dump his ass.
 
LOL none of my friends know what the fuck bluelight is. Which I love. I am always like "dude bluelight this, bluelight that" and they are like "uh..yep"

My friend Josh showed me bluelight in 2005 though. I remember I got my first bunch of klonopins, and we didnt know what they were. We were like "hmm, according to bluelight, it is a benzo, like xanax"

We ate em!
 
soundsystem00 said:
So, I got in touch with an old friend of mine. She is Mexican. We went to highschool with each other and have known each other for over a decade. Well she was giving me a ride the other night. It was a long ride, so we got to talking. We started to talk about her relationship. She is with a younger guy, and although he is Mexican, he seems like a total tool. I had him and her over to my apartment a few weeks ago, and was getting some very negative vibes from him (mean muggin', sticking his chest out, etc)

Well we had a little manly moment where he was walking by and I kind of stood as a barrier. You know what I am talking about. I won.
He is a lot younger and smaller than me, I could destroy him.

That being said, she tells me about how abusive he is. Tells me she cries every day, and that he cheats on her, uses her for a place to stay, and often physically abuses her. What the fuck am I suppose to do? I could easily beat his ass, but at the same time, is it my place? Yes she is an old friend, but I have no seen her in years. Is this a cry for help? Would beating his ass solve anything, or just make him more abusive toward her?

I really do not know how to handle this. I feel like I should AT LEAST confront him about it next time I see him. He is a cocky guy, so I know if I bring it up, I will have to end it my way.

Suggestions?

ps. it would feel good to beat someones ass for a good cause like this
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he sounds like an asshole to me, anybody who hits a women is scum as far as i'm concerned. but as for beating him up, i would think twice about it. because the cowardly bastard that he is, would probably go blubbing to the police. and you would probably be done for assualt. i would just tell the girl to leave the sack of shit.
 
I don't think u should get involve at all, i know a guy like this, who gets beaten up from his gf, lol. Last week he actually got stab, but he still won't leave her. Once he was beaten up soo badly, that they had to take him to the hospital, and the next day like nothing happend :/..
My other friend told me he likes it, he likes it when he gets sympathy from others.

So I think this girl might like it to, she probably likes the attention shes getting from it, Or the sympathy shes getting.

your saying this girl is hot and young, if she didn't like it, she can find someone else. She is a big girl, she can take care of herself. we are not talking about a little girl here.

Anyway don't overthink, and don't show too much attention to her, hangout with her, but if she bring it up, tell her its your choose that ur staying with her, tell her stop misbehaving so he wont hate you. Maybe shes doing something, thats casuing him to hit her :/.. Since she won't leave him, maybe she can stop doing whatever shes doing thats causing him to hit her.

For example this guy I know, she usually hits him when when he misbehave, or when he gets very drunk and acts retarded. btw this guy is rich and good looking to, and he can get any girl he wants to..
 
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Right...unless she asks you for your advice, I would ask a mutual female friend to talk to her about it...make sure she breaks up with this cunt, and cuts him out of her life, sponging off her, treating her like shit - what a waste of space!

Ya can't go all white knight here unless you're ready to drop him. Are you? That's what you'll have to do if you're going to get properly involved. All you can do is ask a friend to help talking to her, and be there for her as a shoulder to cry on.
 
Any guy that hit's a woman is fucking scum in my opinion. Personally id beat the ever loving fuck out of the guy for it and tell him that if he ever touched her again that you'd put him in the ground yourself. Leaving him no doubt that you would do such a thing would also help. But yeah i can be hot headed in situations like this so taking others advice might be a good idea.
 
Mel22 said:
Exactly piebald - you hit the nail on the head. People are constantly critical and judgemental of our substance use/abuse, and the fact that we won't walk away from it - they don't understand it. Who is anyone to judge this girl because she feels that she cannot walk away from her relationship when we don't fully understand her situation? Granted, this man is bad news, but so are our addictions in most instances.

Non-judgemental, genuine support is key. If she has good friends around her, it will make it easier for her to leave him when she is ready. If you get involved, she'll likely lose you and it may just make it harder for her to leave him as she's lost at least part of her support network.
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I try not to be judgemental but we as drug users/addicts do it because we like the way drugs make us feel, are you saying she likes the way the beatings feel? Not the same thing, although both circumstances could be considered bad for your health, I rather have a drug problem than some clown beating on me like im a pillow............
 
paranoid android said:
Any guy that hit's a woman is fucking scum in my opinion. Personally id beat the ever loving fuck out of the guy for it and tell him that if he ever touched her again that you'd put him in the ground yourself. Leaving him no doubt that you would do such a thing would also help. But yeah i can be hot headed in situations like this so taking others advice might be a good idea.
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Im not a hot head at all, but if my brother in-law beat my sister, he would have broken arms & hands & would have to be spoon fed his meals.........no one messes with my family or close friends.........
 
TheLostBoys said:
Im not a hot head at all, but if my brother in-law beat my sister, he would have broken arms & hands & would have to be spoon fed his meals.........no one messes with my family or close friends.........
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I'm pretty much the same way. I can forgive someone fucking me over but mess with my family or a close friend and i will fuck you up.
 
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