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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

Benzos - Am I physically dependent?

G

guessilovestraws

Greenlighter
Joined
Feb 10, 2013
Messages
19
I use xanax off and on. By that I mean every couple of weeks or so. I'll go on a 2-3 day binge. But during those binges, my tolerance gets up to around 8mgs. And I don't even feel that fucked up. So I'm wondering.. since I'm not a daily or even weekly user, should I be concerned about benzo withdrawal since I have such a high tolerance? I definitely get mood swings/emotional a week or so after I've stopped the Xanax binge but I''ve also been dealing with changes in Methadone dosages, and just recently switched from Methadone to Suboxone.

Also, I went through my 60 10mg Valium quite quickly during my transition from Meth to Subs. Barely felt em, in fact.

Should I be worried something worse is coming?
 
You're right. It's difficult being on opioid maintenance and not diverting your addiction elsewhere.

Thanks for your response.
 
The dark side can show you a lot of how addiction can torment a person.

I would read on the subject at hand.

If you feel you cannot stop safely, always never be ashamed to ask for help.
 
Another hint of advice that i sincerely wish weren't true. Any regular use of benzodiazepines, opiates, amphetamines, or any other miscellaneous class of mood altering substance is likely to cause dependency. Unfortunately it just isn't possible to use substances like these and dose in a way that eliminates the inevitability of dependency over a period of time. In addition, you will notice that all use with these substances progresses in a similar fashion. A gradual increase of frequency of dosing combined with an increasing tolerance followed by come down symptoms and later withdrawal with out the substance. Final product usually ends up physically if not psychologically dependent/addicted.
 
The beginning of a more serious dependence/addiction to benzos is most likely what he meant.

Benzos are very insidious in nature. You can develop an addiction pretty much overnight. Meaning that one time you go on a bender and you come off without an issue but the next time, you go on a bender, just to find that you can't come off of them.
 
I find it completely frustrating because I don't even get a dime of euphoria when I take this shit! When taken with Adderall, however, it's a different story. The synergy of the two reminds me of opiates to a degree. BUT I use that combination very sparingly and really hate missing a good night's sleep anyway, so not worth it.

This is probably a discussion more fit for the dark side, but I'm afraid to go back to NA for this (which was a great help after my kick off my H/sub volley). I was on a small island off Massachusetts at the time so the groups were cozy and intimate, people were generous, NOT crazy, and just extremely caring. Now I feel stuck cus I've just moved to LA and being on any kind of opiate maintenance violates the "NA community handbook" definition of sobriety which I think is a dumbass policy. Boohoo.

Thanks for calling like it is though.

I am starting an intensive outpatient program next Monday, though.
 
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