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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Benzodiazepines experiences

B

BenzoCat

Greenlighter
Joined
Oct 4, 2022
Messages
18
Hi just joined wanted to say hello. I’ve referenced a lot of information in the past which has been useful but just decided to join the community.
I have very bad social anxiety and sleep issues and have used benzodiazepines to help me over the years. I am lucky as I currently I have a medication tub which has:
diazepam Galenka and apaurin brand
Xanax Ksaol 1 mg Upjohn 90 tablets too
Nitrazepam 10 mg
Clonzepam 2 mg
Zopiclone 7.5 mg

I took different in past and learned what’s best for me. The days of Xanax bars are behind me as are msj the crazy days. I was always a diazepam man. But over time I’ve realised that switching stops tolerance and now what I do is to manage anxiety I take clonzepam in 0.5 doses as required or for a change maybe a Xanax for sleep I find zopiclone very strong and to be used as little as possible , if you need good sleep a nitrazepam is very good for it. Then I find after a few nights taking 2 10 mg diazepam relaxes and gives good sleep. This has stopped tolerance. It’s a safety net having different benzos ready when needed should high stress come. Years ago I’d abuse them take 15 diazepam 10 mg night Xanax bars to I blacked out. Now adays I use only to help sleep when needed and if I’m under a lot of stress at work I may take small doses of clonzepam. My experience is very good should anyone need advice. Wanted to say hello to everyone and share my journey from a abuser of benzos from 20 year old to 28 to a very experienced person who now uses only when needed and for purpose also avoiding tolerance or dependence as I go sometimes 3 weeks not needing any at all. To stop dependence that was control only allowing 2 diazepam or 1 clonz 1 Xanax etc not 5. Also I do a lot of exercise now which stops the need for benzos alot I like diazepam to relax sore muscles now. Big up from Benzocat
 
Hello benzocat

You went from extreme benzo abuse to using it sparingly and even being able to going 3 weeks without it voluntarily?

That is both unusual and impressive!

Personally once I start benzos, even in low/therapeutic doses, there is an instantaneous psychological dependence because I am naturally very anxious. I find it extremely difficult if not impossible to stop. I try to avoid them for that reason as withdrawal is worse than opiates to me. Unfortunately now my vice is alcohol because they sell it in stores.

I also love to exercise as a substitute, particularly running. Running high feels like a mild benzo to me.

Welcome to BL
 
Hello there my friend. I have watched blue light for years using it sometimes as a guide but never joined the community. I know what you mean we all have a vice, benzo alcohol opiates but it’s nice to have a community to talk no judgement just good advice. Yes I was a heavy abuser for 10 years xanax and diazepam were the vices of choice and I caused destruction.

Then I went few months without 4 years ago detoxed at home no substances. Then as the anxiety crept in I was back into running and plyometric training so naturally tired. A good friend of mine who I go to for benzo access made me realise this years ago about how to combat tolerance and dependence and honestly best thing I did. I never take same benzo for more than a night or 2 and I only take small doses of what I need. Then I’ll go a week without but then when I have extreme stress kick In I’ll then take a clonz 0.5 and works and I do it for the value not the high. I enjoy 2 diazepam 10 mg where as I used to need 15 lol. Nitrazepam and zopiclone are just one tablet knockouts for me personally job done sleep and feel ready to go I. The Morning. I gave my friend who was in a bad place a good share of my personal diazepam and Xanax as he was in serious desperate circumstances and this made me realise how the abusive me who hid the habit and would not give away them was gone! It felt great I realised that they didn’t control me I control them and if I need them I enjoy not need. I have apaurin in my tub I buy 2 years ago blusterpack still not open. That to me is a massive change. So how was your experience which did you like to take which did you find hard to stop? It’s good talking here as friends do t admit they ever really had a problem they say they just relaxing o. Their 6th xannie bar, I’m lucky to have changed my mindset. And it was easier than I thought I’d love to help others too. Benzos are great and moderately can be so useful as long as care is taken with switching and small breaks I’m lucky as I have maybe 5-6 different benzo so I can change to stop tolerance easy then long run exercise I do t take 3 days or so so dependence don’t form. I like benzos always will but having control and a plan in moderation is more enjoyable I’m in a good place last 4 years transformed my whole life and I still use these to help me when needed it’s just different purpose.

I must admit I do live a good cold ale I. The pub also my friend :)
 
Anxiety is hard I have Asperger’s so anxiety is hard I know your pain so abusing them was easy for me. But now with exercising and structured plan I know I can go work take 0.5mg clonz 3 days when I’m stressed in day and a zopiclone or diazepam at night for sleep 1 tablet then I’ll go 3 weeks feeling good and not needing anything. Anxiety is crippling and I feel everyone pain no one understands what we go through and ho easy it is to abuse benzos in our position.
 
I have asperger's, too. I know how it is. I can barely function without undue stress unless I have some sort of gabaergic in my system.

I also abused many worse drugs than benzos over the years. Benzos are seductively functional in comparison, but just as addictive to me. Getting off them is just as bad as getting off heroin for me.

Alcohol is an infinitely worse drug, but harder to stop because it's legal and sold next to the chicken in the grocery. I live in the US where benzos are rarely prescribed.
 
I wouldn't say that they're rarely prescribed, especially not in the past, but even today many prescriptions for benzos are written every year.

They're not particularly recreational IMO. For me they're just not recreational, period, but I know that some people like them. I used to get some therapeutic value out of them, as a way to reduce anxiety, but there was always a darker element that lurked underneath all of those experiences which eventually overcame any anti-anxiety value I derived from the drug, and that was just a feeling of total emotional numbness, a feeling like nothing mattered or ever could matter...it just kind of reduced the intensity of life in general, like when I looked at colors in the outside world they'd look more muted...other drugs taken while under the influence of benzos would be reduced in their pleasurable effect...and all that just combined with the hypnotic effect of the drug, it really made me depressed and just felt like a lobotomized zombie basically.

Just IMO but I think that their addictive potential is routinely overstated. I've heard a lot of people before say, oh man really? look at all the people on Bluelight who've had problems with benzodiazepines! Well a lot of the people here will abuse just about anything they can get their hands on, won't they?
:rolleyes: Most patients who are prescribed benzodiazepines for a mental health issue like anxiety etc. have no issues regarding abuse of the medication.

They are a useful medicine to keep on hand in small supplies, as an emergency measure (for example, if you're having a panic attack or coming down from a taxing stimulant or hallucinogenic drug)
 
Pissed_and_messed said:
I didn't even care for food and music while on benzos... Withdrawing I found taste of beer again and started to listen music again.
Click to expand...

Yeah i lose interest in music when I'm on benzos, and also i lose alot of ability to write music. Yet my ability to perform live goes up, and it sort of unlocks some of my technical ability in general (i can play more difficult music more smoothly) I guess by simply calming the nerves so to speak. But my interest in it almost disappears. It's not so much that I don't enjoy it anymore, just doesn't interest me
 
I've been on benzos from a doctor for 15 years. I've never abused them. My tolerance haven't went up.
My doctor had a student with her and the student mentioned if I wanted to eventually wean myself off. If it wasn't for benzos I would have killed myself by now.

Everyone is different and it's safer for me to take my prescription then self medicate.
 
The more I have read, the more convinced I am, there are some people it works to.

I also believe it can not be known before one tries. I would refer to reseaarch if I god damn found it.

I guess that best is to not up the dose more than maybe once or twice in the beginning. That way it is only modestly painful to get off if it seems better than messing with so hazard medicines.
 
I agree with a lot of the above for sure. I find having different types to use in moderation to stop tolerance is a big help. Different moods and makes easy to go weeks without taking. I used to take 15 10mg diazepam’s in a night 10 years ago last night I took 2 10 mg diazepam relaxed the muscles slept like a log woke up straight to the gym!!

I do take a Modafinil in morning with a coffee when I need which does help also with lifestyle.

Tonight I’ll take either 10 mg nitrazepam or 7.5mg zopiclone change the routine to get good sleep. Best advice I can give that helps me with all the addiction and anxiety is exercise with work, Modafinil in morning wakes and stimulates you for the day work exercising office and mood, then the use for benzodiazepines is purely to help you sleep not abuse etc a 10mg nitrazepam or just 1 zopiclone tonight is all I need, I would take. A 2 mg clonzepam but although I like the sleep I prefer those in 0.5 snaps for daytime anxiety like if I have to give a presentation at work 0.5 clonzepam or 1 mg ksoal xanax.

I used to love benzo recreational but with the changes I made over the years it’s more just a necessary evil I use now to help sleep or to have on hand in unexpected situations where I may find them useful

Even now if I have bad news or fight at work there’s nothing better than knowing you can get home turn social media off and take a couple of benzos and relax and forget what pissed you off haha

I’m taking a nitrazepam now for sleep and rest now.

Would I change the years of abuse I did ? No it shaped me into who I am and destroyed me and saved me and now I look back and think all that fuss for what a mild tranquility tablet. Anyone with abuse issues follow what I did I guarantee you go from addict to therapeutic literally but working office hard and exercise are key as too is Modafinil a seriously underrated drug
 
Looking to conduct a meet up in northwest Arkansas for benzodiazepine support. Finding others who are currently or previously on benzos that would like to discuss benzo experiences or research into newer or rarer benzo that may have helped!
 
BenzoCat said:
Hi just joined wanted to say hello. I’ve referenced a lot of information in the past which has been useful but just decided to join the community.
I have very bad social anxiety and sleep issues and have used benzodiazepines to help me over the years. I am lucky as I currently I have a medication tub which has:
diazepam Galenka and apaurin brand
Xanax Ksaol 1 mg Upjohn 90 tablets too
Nitrazepam 10 mg
Clonzepam 2 mg
Zopiclone 7.5 mg

I took different in past and learned what’s best for me. The days of Xanax bars are behind me as are msj the crazy days. I was always a diazepam man. But over time I’ve realised that switching stops tolerance and now what I do is to manage anxiety I take clonzepam in 0.5 doses as required or for a change maybe a Xanax for sleep I find zopiclone very strong and to be used as little as possible , if you need good sleep a nitrazepam is very good for it. Then I find after a few nights taking 2 10 mg diazepam relaxes and gives good sleep. This has stopped tolerance. It’s a safety net having different benzos ready when needed should high stress come. Years ago I’d abuse them take 15 diazepam 10 mg night Xanax bars to I blacked out. Now adays I use only to help sleep when needed and if I’m under a lot of stress at work I may take small doses of clonzepam. My experience is very good should anyone need advice. Wanted to say hello to everyone and share my journey from a abuser of benzos from 20 year old to 28 to a very experienced person who now uses only when needed and for purpose also avoiding tolerance or dependence as I go sometimes 3 weeks not needing any at all. To stop dependence that was control only allowing 2 diazepam or 1 clonz 1 Xanax etc not 5. Also I do a lot of exercise now which stops the need for benzos alot I like diazepam to relax sore muscles now. Big up from Benzocat
Click to expand...
I'm still stuck on your benzo "tub." Sweet jeepers, that must have fallen from the heavens into your house bc you sho can't get a tub like that at Walmart!
 
BenzoCat said:
I agree with a lot of the above for sure. I find having different types to use in moderation to stop tolerance is a big help. Different moods and makes easy to go weeks without taking. I used to take 15 10mg diazepam’s in a night 10 years ago last night I took 2 10 mg diazepam relaxed the muscles slept like a log woke up straight to the gym!!

I do take a Modafinil in morning with a coffee when I need which does help also with lifestyle.

Tonight I’ll take either 10 mg nitrazepam or 7.5mg zopiclone change the routine to get good sleep. Best advice I can give that helps me with all the addiction and anxiety is exercise with work, Modafinil in morning wakes and stimulates you for the day work exercising office and mood, then the use for benzodiazepines is purely to help you sleep not abuse etc a 10mg nitrazepam or just 1 zopiclone tonight is all I need, I would take. A 2 mg clonzepam but although I like the sleep I prefer those in 0.5 snaps for daytime anxiety like if I have to give a presentation at work 0.5 clonzepam or 1 mg ksoal xanax.

I used to love benzo recreational but with the changes I made over the years it’s more just a necessary evil I use now to help sleep or to have on hand in unexpected situations where I may find them useful

Even now if I have bad news or fight at work there’s nothing better than knowing you can get home turn social media off and take a couple of benzos and relax and forget what pissed you off haha

I’m taking a nitrazepam now for sleep and rest now.

Would I change the years of abuse I did ? No it shaped me into who I am and destroyed me and saved me and now I look back and think all that fuss for what a mild tranquility tablet. Anyone with abuse issues follow what I did I guarantee you go from addict to therapeutic literally but working office hard and exercise are key as too is Modafinil a seriously underrated drug
Click to expand...
I'm in awe of how many of you have seemingly easy access to the various benzos. I have to make do with 0.5mg of clonazepam, one at bedtime. If I take more, I regret it bc I run low before refill time. I had another doctor who prescribed 2mg klonopin, 3 times a day for panic disorder and I can definitely tell the difference now. Half a milligram is a joke and no fun either.
 
Heard allot of stories about Benzos and the horror tales...so can anyone expert knowledge tell me if somebody took capsule of say 200 mg pure Alprazolam or snorted say 200mg pass out but not die from it ? I wonder if somebody has done this by maybe mistaking for some dope and ended up where they did not know or wish few days later ? Can that huge amount terminate some foolish person or perhaps somebody took foolishly and ended up in Hospital or maybe another state with no knowledge how or why they landed there? Perhaps somebody thought it was plain old RC and bombed it or even worse injected and fell out for few days and that much of pure chem. be lethal or just make somebody slip into a temporary coma?
Master Chief Game GIF by Halo
 
hardtack said:
Heard allot of stories about Benzos and the horror tales...so can anyone expert knowledge tell me if somebody took capsule of say 200 mg pure Alprazolam or snorted say 200mg pass out but not die from it ?
Click to expand...
I don't know about the particular Ld50 of alprazolam but benzos alone are very safe substances in regard to overdose. The danger lies in combinations together with opioids or alcohol.
 
I personally can't control my intake of benzos for very long. I might be good for the first day or two, then I end up taking about 20mg of Klonopin a day, running out 3 weeks early and going through horrible withdrawal symptoms.

Just be very careful,
Dreamflyer
 
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