...some people still see me as a junkie? Weird I know. Like, in one forum I've been at, I get a lot of hate. People think they 'know' me. And call me a delusional junkie all the time. I am getting pretty tired of it. I've been clean for 4 years. I dunno what else to do. :/
Why do people judge us for our past?
first off, wtf would you care about what someone on an internet forum thinks about you?
second, i have been in the same position. i have had long terms of sobriety but people still saw me and labeled me as a junky. at first it brings you down, but you have to remember that you are clean, and in all honesty the only thing that matters is how you view yourself. im sure alot of my old friends still view and label me a junky, but the thing is, i know what i am and i know what i am not. all that matters is that i now accept myself and do not hate myself.
and they judge us because thats human natrue. tear someone else down so you can feel valid. it sucks, but thats life. when i got clean and cleared my head up i realized that alot of the people that labeled and judged me had problems very similar to mine, wether is was alcohol, sex, gambling, or another drug. they just need to feel like they are above whatever they view you as.
once when i was super cleand and super clear minded i went out with a bunch of old high school buddies. i knew that i would be around one kid that has always had it out for me. jealous of one thing or another. i knew he would try to humiliate me in front of everyone and bring up my past. i planned for it. at the bar i had an arguement with him about something trivial. once he got heated i knew it was coming and in a very blunt way basically told me i was nothing more than junky scum and didnt know shit. i had everyone around me stop talking and looked him in the eye and basically let him know very sternly that he wouldnt be getting away with that kind of shit anymore and that he was no better than me and that next time i would not be so kind to him. thats how i was before i was on dope, very alpha male and always stood up for myself. everyone around me just kind of got a big smile and told me good job and went about their business, the kid stfu and walked off.
stand up for yourself, just because you did dope doesnt give anyone the right to make you feel bad.
