Help please . The drug i talk about in this article is = Synthetic cocaine
Alright the experience i am about to explain some will never understand but this event changed my life and im really not sure at all what to do. I know i might need mental health now but i want to try and resolve this in my own way.
I never have had any anxiety issues or mental issues until i had this bad experience i cant seem to shake.
I have used drugs reacreational for a long peroid now, i had tryed estacy maybe 3 times before this experience and had abouslute blast! Never had a bad thought when on any substance. There was a concert coming up so i decided to suss some esctasy a place i took esctasy for my first time. I Managed to suss these white powder capsules and did not test them but thought they would do the job.
I ended up going down i felt totally normal as usualy, pumped for a big weekend. The concert was the next day but we were clubbing that night. Anyway i opened my first cap and did some big lines of the white powder, i felt good and we went to the bottle store then when i got back i had some more lines and by that time it was ready to go into town. When i got to town i found it was really hard to talk to people
I felt like i was too out of it and every single person wanted to fight or was looking at me weirdly which they probably were. I tryed dancing in the clubs but for some reason had none cordiantion at all and everyone started laughing at me. Mates i was clubbing with ditched me because i was an embrassement. For some reason i then though i hadnt had enough of the stuff and needed more to feel good again. So i had another couple of lines i then decided it was time to get out of that bad enviroment which i usually love and still do!
I ended up walking home but for some reason i had no clue where i was walking, i then got a phone call from a mate telling me we should hit the strip club. We went to the strip club which was my first time in one. I didnt mind it in there but again i felt like i was being looked at again and everyone hated me.
Finally i ended up back in my hotel room, where i heard my mate and his girlfriend having sex next to me. I tryed not to think about it but i was wide awake and they were extremly load. My head started going crazy and this is where it gets bad and has never changed. I felt like everything i thought i was saying outloud. It sucked and i could not stop it at all! i was saying things like fuck me in the ass or i want us to have a orgy. Keep in mind i think all this stuff in my head, i am actually saying it but i wasnt i did not find this out until days later but even now im unsure.
I started to think i was being recorded and there was a camera crew outside. I was so scared and i finally built up to go downstairs and check. When walking downstairs i heard in my head people running away and i thought this was the camera crew. It is about 4am in the morning. I went and asked hotel receptioist to test if he was the one recording, i asked him for glass of water which i forgot i did 10 seconds latter and asked again. I then asked him if i could go outside to test if he wanted me to stay at the hotel. He said yes and i walked out the door. I then began walking the steets of this city i had never ever been around before really.
I walked all around town thinking i was being recorded and randomly my mate found me wondering the streets. He was also on the same stuff as me and was bad tripping but not nearly as bad. He tryed walking me back to the hotel. Keep in mind this whole time i am saying stuff in my head like "i want to fuck you" "why are you doing this to me" "im gay" "im not gay" "im just saying it for the cameras" "i hope theres a big crowd watching" repeatly saying things like this in my head thinking i am saying them out loud. I couldnt stop. Anyway this isnt even the full explanation. I ended up not even going to the concert and tripping out the whole weekend in my hotel room saying weird shit to
everyone of my mates that came in. Like i mentioned before. I went back to work on monday still with the same mentalilty but alot less intense. By the end of the week it was gone not fully but nearly.
I ended up doing some lines drunk in town a couple weeks latter and got the same effect which have not stopped. I now say things in my head around mates that are extremly rude and cold but i cant stop.
Anyway i know mdma is awesome so when im drunk or on mdma i have no problems at all. Im super sweet on lsd and actually Lsd stopped this voice in my head for a couple of days because i realised it wasnt outloud and i had nothing to worry about.
I try not to think about it and i thought this would just be one of those things that fade away but it has been over 6 months and nothing has changed.
Now When on mdma or achohol i have no problems at all dancing in clubs or talking and there is no voice in my head.
The drug that triggerd this was synthetic cocaine. I only found this out once it was too late. The stuff has literally ruined my life, i cant go anywhere without this voice in my head saying rude and terrible things. Even about the best of my mates. I hate it and im unsure how to stop it even though i know i havent said anything and dont mean it.
Please any advice or similar effects please please help if you want any more information please ask.
Alright the experience i am about to explain some will never understand but this event changed my life and im really not sure at all what to do. I know i might need mental health now but i want to try and resolve this in my own way.
I never have had any anxiety issues or mental issues until i had this bad experience i cant seem to shake.
I have used drugs reacreational for a long peroid now, i had tryed estacy maybe 3 times before this experience and had abouslute blast! Never had a bad thought when on any substance. There was a concert coming up so i decided to suss some esctasy a place i took esctasy for my first time. I Managed to suss these white powder capsules and did not test them but thought they would do the job.
I ended up going down i felt totally normal as usualy, pumped for a big weekend. The concert was the next day but we were clubbing that night. Anyway i opened my first cap and did some big lines of the white powder, i felt good and we went to the bottle store then when i got back i had some more lines and by that time it was ready to go into town. When i got to town i found it was really hard to talk to people
I felt like i was too out of it and every single person wanted to fight or was looking at me weirdly which they probably were. I tryed dancing in the clubs but for some reason had none cordiantion at all and everyone started laughing at me. Mates i was clubbing with ditched me because i was an embrassement. For some reason i then though i hadnt had enough of the stuff and needed more to feel good again. So i had another couple of lines i then decided it was time to get out of that bad enviroment which i usually love and still do!
I ended up walking home but for some reason i had no clue where i was walking, i then got a phone call from a mate telling me we should hit the strip club. We went to the strip club which was my first time in one. I didnt mind it in there but again i felt like i was being looked at again and everyone hated me.
Finally i ended up back in my hotel room, where i heard my mate and his girlfriend having sex next to me. I tryed not to think about it but i was wide awake and they were extremly load. My head started going crazy and this is where it gets bad and has never changed. I felt like everything i thought i was saying outloud. It sucked and i could not stop it at all! i was saying things like fuck me in the ass or i want us to have a orgy. Keep in mind i think all this stuff in my head, i am actually saying it but i wasnt i did not find this out until days later but even now im unsure.
I started to think i was being recorded and there was a camera crew outside. I was so scared and i finally built up to go downstairs and check. When walking downstairs i heard in my head people running away and i thought this was the camera crew. It is about 4am in the morning. I went and asked hotel receptioist to test if he was the one recording, i asked him for glass of water which i forgot i did 10 seconds latter and asked again. I then asked him if i could go outside to test if he wanted me to stay at the hotel. He said yes and i walked out the door. I then began walking the steets of this city i had never ever been around before really.
I walked all around town thinking i was being recorded and randomly my mate found me wondering the streets. He was also on the same stuff as me and was bad tripping but not nearly as bad. He tryed walking me back to the hotel. Keep in mind this whole time i am saying stuff in my head like "i want to fuck you" "why are you doing this to me" "im gay" "im not gay" "im just saying it for the cameras" "i hope theres a big crowd watching" repeatly saying things like this in my head thinking i am saying them out loud. I couldnt stop. Anyway this isnt even the full explanation. I ended up not even going to the concert and tripping out the whole weekend in my hotel room saying weird shit to
everyone of my mates that came in. Like i mentioned before. I went back to work on monday still with the same mentalilty but alot less intense. By the end of the week it was gone not fully but nearly.
I ended up doing some lines drunk in town a couple weeks latter and got the same effect which have not stopped. I now say things in my head around mates that are extremly rude and cold but i cant stop.
Anyway i know mdma is awesome so when im drunk or on mdma i have no problems at all. Im super sweet on lsd and actually Lsd stopped this voice in my head for a couple of days because i realised it wasnt outloud and i had nothing to worry about.
I try not to think about it and i thought this would just be one of those things that fade away but it has been over 6 months and nothing has changed.
Now When on mdma or achohol i have no problems at all dancing in clubs or talking and there is no voice in my head.
The drug that triggerd this was synthetic cocaine. I only found this out once it was too late. The stuff has literally ruined my life, i cant go anywhere without this voice in my head saying rude and terrible things. Even about the best of my mates. I hate it and im unsure how to stop it even though i know i havent said anything and dont mean it.
Please any advice or similar effects please please help if you want any more information please ask.
