• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: Senior Staff

Approach block?

Markomarkh

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2013
Messages
510
Hi,

I went out to the beach to see the seals in uk norfolk, I was very anxious going there, the car park was full and lots of nice people there, hot dog stools and coffee stools. Went to see the seals and got some fresh air and nature and being around people made me feel better, I don’t do this often I’m stuck on internet most the time. But I saw this steward girl volunteer worker nice casual average build maybe a bit big built legs blond and nice blue eyes just my type in her 30s, I wanted to approach her and say hello and that but got too nervous and got a message in my head ‘Stay away she’s a bItch! My mum talked to her with small talk but I said nothing and walked off eventually. Did I really get a message from a guardian angel because she’s was a wrongen for me or is this my schitsophenia flaring up again and there was nothing wrong with her or opportunity missed or lucky escape or it’s no big deal she’s not there to be chatted up! What you think ?
 
Wasn't meant to be.

But next time, try to put yourself in that uncomfortable situation of talking to a female. Just to see what happens. Worst case scenario you never see her again. Which is what already happened.
 
But is there something wrong with me hearing negative inner voices or is it a sixth sense warning?
 
IME, there would be something wrong on my part, because you know nothing at all about this woman. Unless you are feeling a "bad vibe", which is different and evident based off of body language and stuff like that.

If you are in fact schizophrenic, then maybe that has something to do with it.

I'd bring it up with a doctor. I have no fucking idea.
 
What exactly are coffee stools?
Little huts to buy coffee. Maybe stools is wrong word.


But anyway, If a girl or woman is ment to be wouldn’t it feel natural, easy to talk to and put you at ease if nervous because the body chemistry will be right and in alignment. I’ve been going for wrongens for years because of lust I’ve yet to discover true love!
 
When one's mind is insecure, it finds out several excuses to avoid the target that is generating the anxiety/insecurity. This is specially valid for situations where rejection is involved, one of the worst feelings... I can affirm, it was your mind trying to "protect" you from the danger of being neglected..
 
I think some "waiting for true love" situations are sometimes overly superstitious or full of unrealistic magical thinking in expectations from and for relationships. Media portrayals of relationships can be, are, distortions.

[E.g. the princess doesn't need the prince to complete her, she can hold her own and show love in multiple ways. She can build something together with the prince (or princess etc... today I guess) of course. Hopefully not the Habsburg dynasty. ]

I've been at some nursing homes in the past (family and past work), and people always loved to talk about 50th anniversaries and the like...their secrets to relationships. Some people were petrified and awkward at the beginning of their relationships, uncertain, but developed together. Some did know from right the start. Sometimes things began with lust or curiosity. Some didn't love but connected and learned to love. (Some stayed together out of necessity or beliefs, as well.) There isn't one story or one recipe that fits.

Mental illness can complicate things as well. I have a friend with bipolar who on those highs can get all sorts of perceived connections, even moving to Europe for a true love (spiritual partner might have been her term)...which wasn't what she perceived and declined rapidly as she came down. The opposite can happen as well, discounting valid relationships from internal factors.

This isn't to deny that there can't be other sensations and perceptions with validity in our minds, but to put a layer of care in interpreting it. What is the baseline? What are external and internal factors affecting the situation? [The example/experiment of people being more close after a harrowing experience (e.g. crossing a narrow bridge) comes to mind.] What are our feelings? [Do we tend to overthink or overinterpret?]

I don't think every relationship starts at some level of familiar comfort. Some people have to take risks and feel discomfort to break their molds and begin with another. Rejection and failure are parts of reality and growth in some ways.


I agree with madness. If it felt like magical thinking or something like you have had before / similar to episodes, or quite different, I might bring it up with a doc. Whatever your negative thoughts/ voices may be. Otherwise, write it off (anxious day) and keep on going out there. If you are feeling strange / getting a lot of negative messages with a bunch of situations and people where others don't get that way, it may be something to mention.


[I over thought /wrote this comment when some of the process is emotional etc.../ not just thoughts, but that's how it goes sometimes in expressing.]
 
to be fair OP its prob your mental problems which you have clearly expressed on this site over long periods of time

next time you need to try and talk weather it goes well or not you wont get ahead by being quiet
 
Top