Isnortice91
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2019
- Messages
- 427
Since 2017 because my court ordered probation I've been stuck in the department of mental health. I have to take a Invega injection once every 3 months as part of my probation. But now things just got 100x worse because I'm not living with my dad anymore and my dad won't let me live with him I got help from one of the case workers at the mental health department to get public section 8 housing , I will have my own apartment in 2 weeks but the catch is I can only have it if I continue treatment . My doctor recently told me I only have to take the Invega injection one more time.
But I will be taking Risperdal for now on.
I feel like I'm going to become a old person who still has to show up to mental health department for check ups and it feels weird .
I never heard any voices or seen things while being sober but I said allot of crazy shit to the doctor so I can get a doctor's note for court.
I feel scared all the time , and feel like the only way out is to violently snap and do bad things that will make me end up on CNN news or something. I feel like I'm a animal stuck in a cage and this injection only makes it worse. I get so angry that doctors think they can just inject you with something just because you said crazy shit. I feel like the only way out is death.
I wish my dad can let me stay with him but I'm 29 now . I miss my Kaiser healthcare plan covered by my dad's insurance but that ended when I turned 26
. How come Kaiser never treated me like an animal?
How come Kaiser never injected me like I'm a bad person?.
How come when I was at Kaiser I could say all the crazy shit I wanted and could say I stopped taking my pills and the psychiatrist at Kaiser would not get angry and allow me to quit medication.
Man I hate the mental health system .
I feel the only way to fix these problems is if I one day am in a position of power like some military dictator and I could send these doctors to concentration camps when I think of that I kind of feel happy again .
But I will be taking Risperdal for now on.
I feel like I'm going to become a old person who still has to show up to mental health department for check ups and it feels weird .
I never heard any voices or seen things while being sober but I said allot of crazy shit to the doctor so I can get a doctor's note for court.
I feel scared all the time , and feel like the only way out is to violently snap and do bad things that will make me end up on CNN news or something. I feel like I'm a animal stuck in a cage and this injection only makes it worse. I get so angry that doctors think they can just inject you with something just because you said crazy shit. I feel like the only way out is death.
I wish my dad can let me stay with him but I'm 29 now . I miss my Kaiser healthcare plan covered by my dad's insurance but that ended when I turned 26

How come Kaiser never injected me like I'm a bad person?.
How come when I was at Kaiser I could say all the crazy shit I wanted and could say I stopped taking my pills and the psychiatrist at Kaiser would not get angry and allow me to quit medication.
Man I hate the mental health system .
I feel the only way to fix these problems is if I one day am in a position of power like some military dictator and I could send these doctors to concentration camps when I think of that I kind of feel happy again .