i couldnt imagine doing what he does over and over. i cant handle just seeing it happen continually. it's making me hate him.
all he has to do is be here. that's all. not that hard. be here when you say you'll be and dont call that day with a bullshit excuse. i learned a long time ago to not even tell her he's coming. she would wait for him and he wouldnt show, then id have to feel like the bad guy and try to hug away her tears. all she knows is that he's not here.
it's not like he's incapable of being a father. i wouldnt want her with him if he wasnt. he just doesnt want the responsibility.
but she's so fun to be around. she's loving and sings all the time, she has imaginary friends and believes everything you say, she dances and wants to learn everything. i love her more than life itself yet he has no idea.
and it's always been this way even before she was born. i'd be pregnant and at home waiting for him and he would be out playing pool. it's my fault for not standing up for myself then. that's why he said the other day that i was easy to manipulate. im not, i just dont waste my time explaining his bullshit and why it's obvious.
he's become a burden on my mind. he brings nothing good to the situation. i talk to him on the phone more than he sees her. i dont want to talk to him anymore. i dont think we can be friends because i disagree so much with how he chooses to be a father, or rather, doesnt.
im just going to let it be. i wont call him to ask when he's coming for her and im sure he wont take it upon himself to make the call first. ill focus on being both for her because it's what she needs. i cant waste anymore time infuriated at him. i cant help what he does or make him do other wise.
all he has to do is be here. that's all. not that hard. be here when you say you'll be and dont call that day with a bullshit excuse. i learned a long time ago to not even tell her he's coming. she would wait for him and he wouldnt show, then id have to feel like the bad guy and try to hug away her tears. all she knows is that he's not here.
it's not like he's incapable of being a father. i wouldnt want her with him if he wasnt. he just doesnt want the responsibility.
but she's so fun to be around. she's loving and sings all the time, she has imaginary friends and believes everything you say, she dances and wants to learn everything. i love her more than life itself yet he has no idea.
and it's always been this way even before she was born. i'd be pregnant and at home waiting for him and he would be out playing pool. it's my fault for not standing up for myself then. that's why he said the other day that i was easy to manipulate. im not, i just dont waste my time explaining his bullshit and why it's obvious.
he's become a burden on my mind. he brings nothing good to the situation. i talk to him on the phone more than he sees her. i dont want to talk to him anymore. i dont think we can be friends because i disagree so much with how he chooses to be a father, or rather, doesnt.
im just going to let it be. i wont call him to ask when he's coming for her and im sure he wont take it upon himself to make the call first. ill focus on being both for her because it's what she needs. i cant waste anymore time infuriated at him. i cant help what he does or make him do other wise.
hope so