and RFD What should we do with the Singles thread? V2

[PsychoKitten]

and RFD What should we do with the Singles thread?

I'm just stealing bits and pieces from my posts that I'm going to merge over here in a sec but here's the Poll v2.

Ok guys and girls here's the chance to vote for the closing of one of Aus Social's longest running institutions. Or perhaps you’ll help us decide what it should evolve into.

The poll will be open for one week and at the end of that week the results will be taken into consideration and an announcement made, then another few days for any feedback to be given. I already have an admin willing to give me a list of who voted what in the poll and I will at the end of the week assess the voters against the actual participants. HOWEVER the criteria for participants will be people who have still participated in the past 4 versions (that's the last two months).

Please understand the following:

• We WANT your input, please don’t just vote and walk away, tell us your opinion.
• This is your chance to tell us what you want to get out of the singles thread experience
• We will not be transferring the majority of threads that evolve from the discussion in the singles thread into SLR
  [/list=a]
  
  Originally the singles thread started out as a roll-call of who here is actually single. I'm happy to have the same set up, "hey yeah single here" hell I'd even go as far as saying lets make it into a roll call that’s simply “a/s/l single? and social banter.
  
  However, something needs to be done about its current status. I hate opening the thread and seeing intelligent discussion ruined by post-whoring crap. I'd personally like to see the singles thread as is closed so that more threads containing intelligent discussion about particular issues can be opened within the forum and nobody feels alienated from participating because they are not single or don't want to wade through the crap to find the diamonds.
  
  Keep the singles thread as originally intended, a place where you can say hey I’m single or no I’m not single anymore and keep all the social banter in that thread, allowing more meaningful discussions to happen in another thread.
  
  There are many regular posters in the singles thread that have "given up" on the thread lately and also many who have asked what we could do about it to make it better
  
  So we’re throwing it back to you... What do you want to happen; vote in the poll for the option that is closest to your view then help us out by explaining your reasons.
  
  *sigh* You can’t win all the time but hopefully this one goes better

 

[Dante]

If the mods of Aus Social can do this, can you please count the number of votes for "YES GOD YES" of active posters in the thread? It's ridiculous to ask people that don't even use the thread if we should close it or not.

They don't have to read it.

 

[Strawberry_lovemuffin]

I have been put off from opening the singles thread simply because I'm not single... I guess that's the whole point, lol.
But the other day I did, and there's actually some pretty funny discussion happening in there! I kinda wished I'd done it earlier; and I couldn't really see why it's encouraging singles only.

I don't mind if there's a seperate thread for the singles, if that's a place they want to hang out & whatever... kind of like a Sex and the City for boys I guess...

That said, I think making the topics seperate might encourage a bit more participation from everyone.

 

[Pleonastic]

As much as I hate the fucking thing, I have to agree 100% with Dante... I think the results of this poll will be tainted by people that haven't read the singles thread since volume 1, but still vote to kill it. Personally I haven't opened it since volume 15 (which is when I was still a mod), and it doesn't bother me in the slightest that it's still sitting there because I'm sure there are people that are getting enjoyment out of it. I don't even notice it anymore.

Hence my vote for "no"...

 

[Dante]

Oh yeah, and I just realised that the second and third poll options should have their first words changed from "Yes" to "No"...

They are phrased as if the question is: "should the singles thread stay open?", as opposed to "should we close the singles thread?"...

 

[miss apple]

I agree with Pleo and Dante...why ask the people who don't even contribute to the thread whether it should be closed or not?

Why should it even be closed?

If people don't agree with it....don't read it!!. I know you have to read it kitty but that's part of being a mod.

People know what's in it by now....there are already lots of people who happily ignore it....I don't see the issue with it.

I voted 'no' (obviously)

 

[PsychoKitten]

Ok i'm going to address these issues one by one.

I already have an admin willing to give me a list of who voted what in the poll and I will at the end of the week assess the voters against the actual participants. HOWEVER the criteria for participants will be people who have still participated in the past 4 versions (that's the last two months).

Dante, you are right: the second option should read: (and I tried to change this, i even got an admin to try change it but no can do). No: keep it open but keep a closer eye on it to prevent the whinging and whining posts and the i'm back/I'm gone posts.

The third option is for people who think the institution should be closed down to emiminate all the crap and allow thoughtful discussion on the great topics that are brought up in the singles thread and never fully discussed to have their own threads.

for example

The idea of soulmates
Coping with single life
Trust
etc etc etc

These topics deserve their own threads and not to have the discussion ruined by the bullshit that often flows forth in the singles thread. Every time you get into a decent discussion, three or four posts in it's ruined by some stupid post that it not relevant at all to the discussion at hand.

I voted for option 3 and I will stand by that vote. I do not believe anybody should have to read through piles of shit to get hold of intelligent discussion, I don't believe that some of those great subjects ever get fully discussed because so many people are disgusted with the state of the singles thread or simply won't open it because they are not single.

 

[Dante]

Again, with the advent of vBulletin, posts can be moved and compiled from a thread into a brand new one...

What's stopped conversation of these deeper types from being put in their own threads anyway? Oh, that's right, SLR.

If people are after deep and meaningful relationship conversation 24/7, then they can go to SLR, no?

*me is puzzled by this sudden want to close the singles thread*

 

[stacyrox]

I just wonder where all the people who vote "Yes" think alll that useless chatter is going to go.... coz it will end up somewhere.

Meaning either a barrage of useless threads or a barrage of useless posts in threads that were intended to be serious.

I'm certain a lot of people think the singles thread is horrid.. but you gotta give someone a place to tell everyone about an accomplishment or have a whinge..

I'm with Dante on the "If you dont like it dont open it". What I'd like to see is some actual reasons as to WHY people think the singles thread should be closed. Coz seriously "coz it sucks", "I hate it", "its stupid", really arent constructive comments. Nobody is making you view the thread and I'm sure theres a lot of other threads which people have the ability to ignore, so why not this one aswell?

stace.

[edit:] sorry I got the "Yes" and "No" thing around the wrong way.. had the question the other way around in my head.

 

[PsychoKitten]

Dante you have to be joking as you view SLR as deep and meaningful conversation (sorry SLM, although there are some gems within the dirt, we can't exactly call most of SLR deep and meaningful). We're lucky if 30% of Aus Social members also post in SLR, I can't forsee why we would want to transfer those threads over there.

Not to mention that if we transfered all meaningful discussion out of the singles thread the singles thread would be a pile of post-whoring bs and be closed anyhow.

Stacy. The people who vote NO are voting to keep the thread the way it is.

We are extremely open to people saying why they don't like it, or why they do and wow the poll has only been open for about 2 hours and look already. It's open for a week, lets see how it runs.

As I said before, I have an admin willing to give me a list of who posted what so i can judge the votes against the participants, if they're not willing to post why they would like it closed, then I'll ask for a PM from them explaning why.

yey 6.8 more days of this to go til the poll runs out. Ten bucks says by then I'm sick of it and give up my mod spot

C'mon chill out, be constructive in your criticism and actually think of how this will afffect the forum, not just yourself.

Originally the singles thread started out as a roll-call of who here is actually single. I'm happy to have the same set up, "hey yeah single here" hell i'd even go as far as saying lets make it into a roll call a/s/l single?

However, something needs to be done about it's current status. I hate opening the thread and seeing intelligent discussion ruined buy post-whoring crap. I'd personally like to see as I said before option 3 go ahead with more threads with intelligent discussion that nobody feels that they cannot take part in because they are not single or don't want to wade through the crap to find the diamonds.

 

[miss apple]

These topics deserve their own threads and not to have the discussion ruined by the bullshit that often flows forth in the singles thread. Every time you get into a decent discussion, three or four posts in it's ruined by some stupid post that it not relevant at all to the discussion at hand.

There's nothing stopping anyone who wishes to discuss these topics from opening their own thread is there?

I know the singles thread has been a hated thing from the beginning....but it wouldn't have survived if there wasn't a need or a want for it.

As a regular poster in the thread....I ignore the extra crap posts, I laugh at the funny crap posts, I read the serious posts, think about the thoughtful ones, and reply when I have something to say. Why can't others do the same? I just don't see the issue.

Not liking the content of a thread is not a reason to close it.

 

[PsychoKitten]

actually you know what, fuck this

I'm going to re-create the poll which means all you guys will get to vote again. I'm going to word the options better AND i'm going to then merge this thread and that one so you can all see where the changes came from BUT I will do all this right after I've had a cigarette.

*whew*

 

[hoptis]

I would like it to stay.

It reminds me of a singles bar.

Like in any bar, you have people who are trying to have serious discussions and other people who get drunk and start shouting "SHOW US YERRR TITZ!!!" over your conversation. Nothing wrong with that.

Like any bar, you have that one miserable, sad guy/girl in the corner complaining to anyone who'll listen about how he can't find a girlfriend. Then, just as your trying to tell him not to get too worried about it, someone shouts over the top of you, "SHOW US YOUR TITZ HON!"...

It's a good mix of social banter and worthwhile discussion which isn't too hard to follow and a bit of fun.

Serious, on-topic and intelligent discussions can be kept to SLR. Please don't take away Singles thread.

 

[stacyrox]

I know what you mean by having people ruin what could have been a rather intelligent and informative discussion in the singles thread.. but the thing is.. a lot of the time its the whinging and other bullshit that occurs in this thread which spawns some of those discussions.

How about, as some kind of compromise, being able to request that a certain discussion be moved from the singles thread to become an actual topic if it shows potential for being a worthy discussion? (I'm assuming that that kind of thing can happen now, as its kinda been alluded to elswehere.. if not then dont mind me )

stace.

 

[PsychoKitten]

actually i lie

I'm going to do all that when i get home since thank god it's home time here!!!!

*sigh*

I really really hate the fact that you can't please everyone, there are many regular posters in the thread that have "given up" on the thread lately and also many who have asked what we could do about it to make it better.

When I get home I will do as I said before, re-create the poll, word the options better and include a couple of extra that have arisen from this discussion then merge the threads and see what as a whole we can come up with. We’re asking for your input for a reason, we’ve listened to the complaints by users and actually want you to help come up with how you’d like this run. I’m leaving here now, I’ll be home in half an hour, feel free to keep coming up with suggestions and I’ll do all the re-creating thing as soon as I’ve gone inside, fed my cat, had a shower and got changed and can get to my computer

 

[PsychoKitten]

there we go, read the first post again and vote again.

 

[stacyrox]

Thank you Kitty for fixing things up for us all

*reassuring hugz*

You've put a lot of effort into how you've set this up so that its not biased or hijacked in any way. Persevere and hope that something constructive comes out of this.

Hopefully we can keep all feedback in here constructive.. if you do have something worthwhile to say I do hope you say it coz nothing can be fixed if no one else knows about it.

Now I'm gonna shut up for a while, coz I'm posting every 2 mins in here

stace.

 

[vurtomatic]

people seem to feel inclined to submit token posts despite the fact that it is contrary to the point of a discussion forum. this is not just a problem specific to the singles thread but most prevalent there.

i say we create an "a/s/l thread" for people who feels the need to advertise their status: they can join and leave the thread as and when they get hooked up or turn single again (which seems to be a regular occurance for some posters in the singles thread). i fail to see how advertising oneself will facilitate one's quest for a partner but there're stranger things on the internet... if people want to (ab)use bluelight as a dating service, well, this is the social forum afterall, i suppose we can be accomodating (disclaimer: that does not reflect a mod concensus).

posters who wanna put in token posts of the "yay i got laid" "yay im leaving" "yay im single and enjoying myself" "boohoo im single and my hand's tired/im outta batteries" can do so in the a/s/l thread.

posters who wanna start genuine discussions, feel free to create their own threads; we can do with some diversity in the forum. rather than have replies all lumped into one singles thread, users can reply to whichever "singles discussion" they fancy.

however

a problem which would quickly and easily arise from this (judging from how fast the singles thread grows): social is going to be inundated with a deluge of relationship threads.

i dont think we need that in social. if we go with that option, i would hope that users have enough common sense to look for relevant threads to contribute discussions to, rather than going off and starting new threads for every single number of the opposite sex they picked up or every boy/girl who doesnt call.

i would like to consider stacyrox's suggestion, and yet, its quite ridiculous to have mods babysit one singles thread (and i dont think im underestimating the amount of time needed to police the singles thread and splitting it into seperate threads when a discussion is popular).

why cant the rest of u just use the SLR forum?! it is the sex, love, relationship forum afterall.

 

[PsychoKitten]

Well I've just merged the singles thread from begining to end. It's fantastic, like having our very own mills and boon novel Seriously read through it, so many memories *wipes tear*

You can see how it started out, how there was some amazing discussion and how that discussion got turned into crap and how some actually worked.

 

[Backo]

Im very pro having separate threads.. I mean when u are into the topic, u write a response then come back 2 days later interested in what people have written and its gone off on some horrific tangent that leads to the demise of the thread :D

but yeah maybe an and A/s/l thread for bantering bullshit (lounge style) would be good for the fun bitchiness about the other sex and a serious "keep to the topic at hand" thread for the ole deep and meaningful stuff.

anyway thats just me explaining why i voted the way i did... Greens i mean 3 lol. 8)