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An eternity it seems

EU4RIK

Bluelighter
Joined
May 23, 2010
Messages
169
Mods move this if its not in the right place, just thought it was a thinking kind of problem.

Okay so I'm in high school, halfway through grade 11 and now is when i need to start thinking about my future....but i dont want to, i cant see myself growing old, i cant see myself going to university, and then having to work for most of my life and then growing old, i just cant picture it.

Obviously I'm going to have some anxiety over leaving home going out into the world etc but its not the leaving and doing my own thing part I'm anxious about, its the fact that i just cant picture myself doing anything at all. I do alright in school but don't really excel at anything which makes choosing a life path even harder. it makes me so anxious thinking about what I'm gonna end up like, and having to live through 60+ years because being alive for so long just seems like its going to be an eternity that i don't know i want to go through. its not that i don't want to live a full life, and i don't want to kill myself or anything like that, i just cant see myself being alive for so long. seeing my grandmother not being able to do anything but sit and read or do anything but stay in the house just makes me think that someday I'm not going to be able to do anything, and i just don't want that to ever happen, cause i just don't think I could be happy.

I don't see the point of going to school for upwards of 16 years and then working for 40 some years until i can retire, because once your finally free your too old to do anything that you want to. i have no idea what I'm gonna do either which just makes things even worse. is it really worth it, to grow old i mean? sorry for the long post/rant i guess I'm just wondering if anyone else was ever in the same position as I'm in now and even if you weren't/aren't any advice is welcome.
 
Welcome to the club.

I don't know anybody in my age range (I'm 24) that knows what to do with their life. A few have jobs that they do, but I don't think anybody knows what's going on.

Now, for some positivity: life has no predetermined purpose, so you create the meaning of your life.

If you don't want to do anything, don't do anything. I don't really feel like doing anything either. I ride my bike, take photos, explore the city, read, listen to music, masturbate, exercise, eat and sleep. I work just enough to pay the bills, leaving me a lot of free-time to do nothing. When I was your age I thought there was some way of getting out of work; I'll fill you in on a little secret to save you some anguish and time: it isn't possible. If you don't want to do anything (or you want to do things, but don't know what, yet), get a job as a waiter or a busboy. You will make enough money to live comfortably while only working a handful of hours a week. In your free-time, figure out what you like to do.

One thing that I'd like to point out to you: worrying about what it's like to be old and decrepit isn't going to make your life better. If you are constantly worrying about how long and boring life is going to be, you'll forget to live in the first place-- and it will be pretty boring too!

If there isn't anything to do up there in Nova Scotia, move to a bigger city. Get away from your family, make some new friends (or don't).

In the end, you've only got one life, so try to decide whether you actually want to do nothing-- perhaps you're simply lacking inspiration? :)
 
"When I was your age I thought there was some way of getting out of work; I'll fill you in on a little secret to save you some anguish and time: it isn't possible. "

AMEN!

make it a labour of love
 
Your not alone buddy, im almost 22 and have no idea.

I've just come back to Australia from a trip through Europe to no job, no money, few friends and no direction. I'm living off the last $350 in my account, before im forced to find a new job or go back to my old one.

I value my time over work, so i only work very little hours.. enough to pay rent and bills, it 'can' be viable in the long-run if your happy with having very little, but sooner or later your going to want more from life. If i could somehow figure out how to do it.. i would live out of my backpack and suitcase and just travel.

I dont have too much interest in establishing a routine lifestyle, i need to be in a state of constant change and always moving, otherwise i become bored and depressed.

Try not to over-simplify it though, if you look at it from the perspective that you goto school, work for 40 years, retire then die, its definitely going to seem very daunting but there is ALOT that happens in-between all of that, and your in control.

Try taking up activities that interest you, even if you don't think they could lead anywhere financially, as long as your busy and enjoying what your doing.. it won't matter if your not making a living from it.

I've decided to take-up learning a second language, purely for the hell of it.. it's a lifelong skill that will stay with me no matter what i do or where i go, and because i enjoy traveling so much it will have it's benefits.
 
I don't know anybody in my age range (I'm 24) that knows what to do with their life. A few have jobs that they do, but I don't think anybody knows what's going on.

I'm 25 and I spoke to all the teachers at my dad's retirement party (he's a teacher) and asked them how they were back when they were my age. ALL of them said exactly the same thing.. "we were like you.. we didn't know what we wanted to do.. it just happened". Unfortunately life on this planet consists of paying the bills and "working". You can do it other ways but you have to make sacrifices and change your lifestyle if you want to live outside the norm.. you have to work out what it is you want. Do you want to party and travel around but not have the security for old age, or do you want to work and be a part of a society that can provide certain services for you that you otherwise wouldn't have access to?

Life doesn't matter, that is the truth. Existence is a hall of mirrors, you are reflecting your own perfection against other mirrors :) It does not matter whether you fail in society, get rich, kill people.. it simply doesn't matter. But you are here. I don't know what I want to do with my life, I've been unhappy for a long time (since finding out how this world really works).. so I just chug along and try to bring a smile to others if I can, try to connect with them on the deepest level they will allow. Occassionally you meet someone who reflects perfectly.. and even if you only meet them once in your entire life, your life was a success.

"Happiness" is a carrot on a stick for society. Come to terms with your impending death now and you will make changes in your life. Everyone who's almost died or had a NDE says they wish they'd done things differently.. because they forgot they would one day die. Contemplate your end and you'll start living.
 
Without an external reference point, the body knows no time -- that is why music is written on a relativistic scale -- the beat or the metronome anchors the notes to external time.
 
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