fizzygirl
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2000
- Messages
- 7,818
A friend and I had planned on trying this as a celebration of the end of our semester. We had been with another friend that tried it the week before, so knew basic timelines/what to expect, etc. The decision was made *not* to try to go anywhere, but just to enjoy ourselves at my friend's house. Just to let you guys know, I have the tendency, when I do things like this, to try not do the typical things. I sometimes avoid electronic music and flashy lights. I want to see how it affects normal everyday things. 
9:30pm Took 40mg (friend took 50mg) oral dose of amt in a capsule. Sat down to watch some television. Watched *lots* of television.
11:30pm Friend's buzz started to kick in, and I noticed because he would not sit down for anything. I felt no buzz at this point, but I did start to get a knot in my stomach. Time seems to be going by really slow, and now I can't even pretend that I'm not waiting for something to happen. Start getting pissy.
12:00am Still not much of anything. Stomach feels icky. More pissy. Realize MTV2 has hip-hop on and feel better
12:20am Ohhh...prescence of "annoying research chemical buzz" makes itself known. You know, that feeling that you really need to stretch your arms and legs out, that you could run a mile and they'd feel better--yet nothing really helps? Yeah..that. Throw up once, then nausea goes away. Friend is totally silly now, and is having some visuals while he sat in the bathroom. Said he'd save them so they'd be there when I went in. He draws me a picture of a smiley face on a post-it-note and hands it to me. Says it wouldve been a bunny but he was afraid it might be deformed. I'm really starting to get jealous at this point!
1:30. About damn time! Eyes start doing really cool/odd things. Not eye wiggles like when rolling, and not just having visuals like when taking acid. Some sort of combination. Seemed *very* controllable though. There was never the feeling that one didn't know what was real and what wasn't. Pupils are HUGE, and I am restless. I really find it hard to sit down for more than a few minutes at a time, and impossible to really watch television other than videos. Felt like I'd had some really good stimulants in there as well.
2:02am Time has come close to standing still--a minute lasts fooorever. Which is fine by me, as I'm having a great time. In fact, I am amazing. That's it, simply amazing. The amt is definitely doing stuff for my ego at this point. I signed onto chat and talked with a couple of people. Had the realization and made the remark that I would be dangerous at a club right now. I truly had the feeling that, for all intents and purposes, I am the only girl for any man. I couldn't fathom at this point that this would not be true.
2:20 Go into bathroom and end up looking at the mirror. Mirrors are dangerous things for me when I'm rolling, as I become attatched to them. I know many people think they look odd when fucked up, but I always think I look beautiful--maybe it's the pupils..who knows. Anyway, I am actually practicing making "come hither" looks in the mirror (related to my newfound insight?). Realize I'm being silly and laugh to myself and then watch this in the mirror for a while, then look at the mirror and try not to consciously 'practice' doing anything. Too hard, plus I've stood in front of the mirror too long. Move on.
2:23 Brush teeth b/c mouth has icky feeling. Do NOT enjoy this. Brushing teeth on some substances is fun. This felt like I was brushing something like teeth, that were just stuck in my mouth, but weren't mine. Very hard to explain, but very bad feeling.
2:29 Move on to the toilet. I have to pee. I sit down, and start looking at the water droplets on the inside of the clear shower curtain. They start to move, like rain, and then they are little drops of crystal. Okay...cool, but wanna move on. I can't b/c I'm still peeing. Actually get bored 1/2 through and wish I could leave. If that doesn't geive you and idea of the slowing of time, I don't know what would. I shared this with my friend, who laughed and said he'd done the exact same thing.
*****
During this time, I've also noticed other physical things. Jaws are clenching, or, if I open my mouth slightly, teeth are chattering. I alternate b/t cold and hot. We give up changing the thermostat, b/c it gets too confusing. I've had a permagrin for a couple of hours now :D I've mentioned that it has felt, at times, close to rolling, close to a stimulant, and then w/ the basic research chemical buzz. Well, to be honest, there was something else too. You know how men supposedly think about sex every 7 seconds or whatnot? I might have equaled that or beat it. It wasn't like a compulsive thought of it--and I didn't act on anything. More like, I was just constantly aware of that thought and feelings within my body. Very nice aspect of the drug.
*****
3:30 Find comedy special on television...watch some intermittently between going back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Pick up a piece of candy that I'd bought earlier. (think orange slices, but purple). Bite into it and think that I'd make the worst mistake of my life. Promptly laugh my head off and spit til it's gone. Laugh at face of friend who's still trying to eat his.
3:45 Decide to take a bath. Had been wanting to for a while, but wasn't sure if it would be worth the trouble to take clothes off and then have to put them back on. Had distinct worry that I would forget to take socks off before getting in. (?) Friend's house has huge garden tub. Needless to say the whole time I was in there was marvelous. The water felt great, and things seemed to slow down a little. I leaned over to wash my face, and had the following thought: <warning: fizzy gets sappy and self-helpish> It is just as easy for me to start over and renew some area of my life as it is for me to simply wash my face. All it takes is one decision and the motion behind it. I can also do that for someone else's life in my eyes. I can give them second chances that easily.
Decide to get out of the tub and be social. Almost fall over in the tub while putting pajamas on.
4:30 Show friend silly site on computer (www.homestarrunner.com) Make homestar say "marshmallow" lots of times. Get very silly and retarded. Watch the cartoons on there. Laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. After that's done, we realize sesame street is on, and watch that. (I swear I'm not a candy kid!) Laugh more-wonderful beautiful belly deep laughs. At this point I'm able to sit down for longer periods of time. In fact, it feels good to snuggle in the blankets and just lay there--although can't actually sleep.
5:30 Take another bath, in the other bathtub this time. Have some hot tea, which is so very very good. Talk to people in chat some more and watch more tv. Start downloading hip hop and forcing my friend to listen to it. Silliness and conversation follows
From this point on, there is less movement, more introspection and lots of laughing. Still feeling a little scattered at 10 or so, and really really cracked out. We decide to go out by the pool, and the sun really helps make the headache I had go away. Ate something light at lunchtime, and was actually able to get it down and enjoy it. Took a nap later that day and just laid around. Felt rather good after that.
Over all, I'd have to say that I enjoyed this a whole lot. The length of time seemed to be a good middle ground between that of some other substances, and the fact that I felt in control of experiences and self was nice. The nausea wasn't even as bad as I was expecting. I could have done without the restless feeling at the beginning, but I think if someone was a smoker, some weed would supress that a little.
:D
[ 22 April 2002: Message edited by: fizzygirl ]
9:30pm Took 40mg (friend took 50mg) oral dose of amt in a capsule. Sat down to watch some television. Watched *lots* of television.
11:30pm Friend's buzz started to kick in, and I noticed because he would not sit down for anything. I felt no buzz at this point, but I did start to get a knot in my stomach. Time seems to be going by really slow, and now I can't even pretend that I'm not waiting for something to happen. Start getting pissy.
12:00am Still not much of anything. Stomach feels icky. More pissy. Realize MTV2 has hip-hop on and feel better
12:20am Ohhh...prescence of "annoying research chemical buzz" makes itself known. You know, that feeling that you really need to stretch your arms and legs out, that you could run a mile and they'd feel better--yet nothing really helps? Yeah..that. Throw up once, then nausea goes away. Friend is totally silly now, and is having some visuals while he sat in the bathroom. Said he'd save them so they'd be there when I went in.
He draws me a picture of a smiley face on a post-it-note and hands it to me. Says it wouldve been a bunny but he was afraid it might be deformed. I'm really starting to get jealous at this point!1:30. About damn time! Eyes start doing really cool/odd things. Not eye wiggles like when rolling, and not just having visuals like when taking acid. Some sort of combination. Seemed *very* controllable though. There was never the feeling that one didn't know what was real and what wasn't. Pupils are HUGE, and I am restless. I really find it hard to sit down for more than a few minutes at a time, and impossible to really watch television other than videos. Felt like I'd had some really good stimulants in there as well.
2:02am Time has come close to standing still--a minute lasts fooorever. Which is fine by me, as I'm having a great time. In fact, I am amazing. That's it, simply amazing. The amt is definitely doing stuff for my ego at this point. I signed onto chat and talked with a couple of people. Had the realization and made the remark that I would be dangerous at a club right now. I truly had the feeling that, for all intents and purposes, I am the only girl for any man. I couldn't fathom at this point that this would not be true.
2:20 Go into bathroom and end up looking at the mirror. Mirrors are dangerous things for me when I'm rolling, as I become attatched to them. I know many people think they look odd when fucked up, but I always think I look beautiful--maybe it's the pupils..who knows. Anyway, I am actually practicing making "come hither" looks in the mirror (related to my newfound insight?). Realize I'm being silly and laugh to myself and then watch this in the mirror for a while, then look at the mirror and try not to consciously 'practice' doing anything. Too hard, plus I've stood in front of the mirror too long. Move on.
2:23 Brush teeth b/c mouth has icky feeling. Do NOT enjoy this. Brushing teeth on some substances is fun. This felt like I was brushing something like teeth, that were just stuck in my mouth, but weren't mine. Very hard to explain, but very bad feeling.
2:29 Move on to the toilet. I have to pee. I sit down, and start looking at the water droplets on the inside of the clear shower curtain. They start to move, like rain, and then they are little drops of crystal.
Okay...cool, but wanna move on. I can't b/c I'm still peeing. Actually get bored 1/2 through and wish I could leave. If that doesn't geive you and idea of the slowing of time, I don't know what would. I shared this with my friend, who laughed and said he'd done the exact same thing.*****
During this time, I've also noticed other physical things. Jaws are clenching, or, if I open my mouth slightly, teeth are chattering. I alternate b/t cold and hot. We give up changing the thermostat, b/c it gets too confusing. I've had a permagrin for a couple of hours now :D I've mentioned that it has felt, at times, close to rolling, close to a stimulant, and then w/ the basic research chemical buzz. Well, to be honest, there was something else too. You know how men supposedly think about sex every 7 seconds or whatnot? I might have equaled that or beat it. It wasn't like a compulsive thought of it--and I didn't act on anything. More like, I was just constantly aware of that thought and feelings within my body. Very nice aspect of the drug.
*****
3:30 Find comedy special on television...watch some intermittently between going back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Pick up a piece of candy that I'd bought earlier. (think orange slices, but purple). Bite into it and think that I'd make the worst mistake of my life. Promptly laugh my head off and spit til it's gone. Laugh at face of friend who's still trying to eat his.
3:45 Decide to take a bath. Had been wanting to for a while, but wasn't sure if it would be worth the trouble to take clothes off and then have to put them back on. Had distinct worry that I would forget to take socks off before getting in. (?) Friend's house has huge garden tub. Needless to say the whole time I was in there was marvelous. The water felt great, and things seemed to slow down a little. I leaned over to wash my face, and had the following thought: <warning: fizzy gets sappy and self-helpish> It is just as easy for me to start over and renew some area of my life as it is for me to simply wash my face. All it takes is one decision and the motion behind it. I can also do that for someone else's life in my eyes. I can give them second chances that easily.
Decide to get out of the tub and be social. Almost fall over in the tub while putting pajamas on.
4:30 Show friend silly site on computer (www.homestarrunner.com) Make homestar say "marshmallow" lots of times. Get very silly and retarded. Watch the cartoons on there. Laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. After that's done, we realize sesame street is on, and watch that. (I swear I'm not a candy kid!) Laugh more-wonderful beautiful belly deep laughs. At this point I'm able to sit down for longer periods of time. In fact, it feels good to snuggle in the blankets and just lay there--although can't actually sleep.
5:30 Take another bath, in the other bathtub this time. Have some hot tea, which is so very very good. Talk to people in chat some more and watch more tv. Start downloading hip hop and forcing my friend to listen to it. Silliness and conversation follows
From this point on, there is less movement, more introspection and lots of laughing. Still feeling a little scattered at 10 or so, and really really cracked out. We decide to go out by the pool, and the sun really helps make the headache I had go away. Ate something light at lunchtime, and was actually able to get it down and enjoy it. Took a nap later that day and just laid around. Felt rather good after that.
Over all, I'd have to say that I enjoyed this a whole lot. The length of time seemed to be a good middle ground between that of some other substances, and the fact that I felt in control of experiences and self was nice. The nausea wasn't even as bad as I was expecting. I could have done without the restless feeling at the beginning, but I think if someone was a smoker, some weed would supress that a little.
:D
[ 22 April 2002: Message edited by: fizzygirl ]
