S
Sunshineandsummer
Guest
Ok so here's my story: Since high school I have suffered from anxiety and some depression. I am 25 now. My anxiety is triggered by most social interactions. In high school I would hide in the bathroom sometimes because i couldn't face going to class or go to the library during lunch sometimes so I wouldn't have to interact socially. I dropped out of college because my anxiety kept me from going to class and giving presentations or just because I was afraid to be in class with so many strangers. I can't get a job because I feel an overwhelming panic at going to interviews or starting new working with people I don't know. I have no motivation to do anything during the day. I can't focus on tasks im supposed to do and easily get overwhelmed by large projects. I have been put on various anti anxiety meds anti depressants. None of them worked they only made my depression worse and made me feel more sluggish and non motivated. Two months ago I tried a 15 mg Adderall xr pill. It did wonders for me. I have been taking it on and off for the last two months. It gives me motivation and takes away my anxiety. I have gone for two interviews. I feel like I can interact with people better. I know this drug has a high possibility of abuse. I have not ever taken more then the 15mg. I can skip days without it. I don't feel that I am getting euphoria off it. More so that a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and it allows me to think more positive rather then negative. Helps me focus on large tasks that would have sent me spiraling into panic before. Helps me stay focused and organized so I can complete things that I start. I guess my question is am I taking this for the wrong reason? I'm not diagnosed with ADD but this has been the only thing to ever make me feel normal. I have no history of substance abuse I should add.