Hey everyone,
I made a really huge mistake on Saturday night. I just did way too much Molly, and it was very good stuff. Bought from a good friend of mine - it was very crystally, and actually had to be broken up with 2 cologne bottles to make it real powdery before putting it into the capsules.
ANYWAY - went out to a huge party and to be quite honest, I lost my mind and let the party get the best of me. Everything was going fine at first, I did a .2 and started rolling. Then about an hour later, another .2. I was really rolling at this point. But I couldn't stop. I kept re-dosing every 45 minutes or so. By the time I took my last dose at about 3:15AM, I had done a full 1.0G or possibly more of this Molly. It was SO, SO incredibly stupid. I know that now, since I'm in a "normal" state of mind and able to think about it properly.
I'm beginning to get very worried.
For starters, I thought I was going to pass out from overheating. My friends and I had been drinking water throughout the night, but I was SWEATING from dancing so much. When the lights came on at the end, my entire shirt was soaked. Then we had to go down to retrieve our coats from coat check, and there were 2,000 people stuffed down there and NO AIR CONDITIONING. After about 10 minutes down there I decided I couldn't handle it, thought I was going to pass out so I ran outside. This was NYC in January, it was about 15 degrees outside and all I had on was a soaking wet t-shirt, but I was so hot that it felt good and cooled me down.
By the time I got home at 5AM, my eyes were just HUGE and my jaw was clenched like a fist. I couldn't help it - I looked like a monster. I smoked a little bit of weed, drank a few beers and crawled in bed with the hopes of falling asleep. It didn't happen. I think I finally fell asleep at about 7AM-9AM. When I woke up at 9AM my eyes were still huge. Then I was up again until about 12PM, and couldn't take it anymore - I ate 1.0mg of Xanax, even though I was uncomfortable with it, and passed out from 12PM-5PM. That night, I fell asleep at 9:30PM and slept until about 8:30AM the next morning.
This whole week has been HORRIBLE. Monday I was an emotional rollercoaster, depressed all day mostly, couldn't smile or anything. On top of that, my mind just wasn't functioning properly. Felt like I was seeing the world through a cloud in my head, and I'm usually sharp as a tack. Tuesday was not much better, maybe even worse. Wednesday was GREAT - I woke up whistling, singing in my head, prancing around. I was finally HAPPY again. This lasted until about 5PM, and then I got kind of depressed again. Today is Thursday, and I must say that my mood is MUCH improved. Only a few hours throughout the day do I get anxious, and it's mostly related to the main problem:
My mind is still not functioning properly. I am forgetful, and I still have that "cloudy" or "dull" feeling, like I'm not as smart as I used to be. I poured a cup of coffee today, and it tasted TERRIBLE. I couldn't figure out why. It wasn't until 5 minutes later that I realized - not only had I completely forgotten to add sugar, but it took me 5 minutes to relate the fact that the coffee tasted bad to the fact that it lacked sugar!! I was totally shocked and upset. My brain is clearly not working as well as it should.
It's been about 5 days since I ate that last molly. Again, I'm not too worried about the mood. I think that's going to be 100% better by the end of the week. But my brain function has me a little scared. Do you think this will get better, or might I have induced some kind of permanent brain/nerve damage? I know it was just way too much MDMA for one night.
Any help, advice, words of encouragement - ANYTHING - is immensely appreciated. Thank you ALL in advance.
I made a really huge mistake on Saturday night. I just did way too much Molly, and it was very good stuff. Bought from a good friend of mine - it was very crystally, and actually had to be broken up with 2 cologne bottles to make it real powdery before putting it into the capsules.
ANYWAY - went out to a huge party and to be quite honest, I lost my mind and let the party get the best of me. Everything was going fine at first, I did a .2 and started rolling. Then about an hour later, another .2. I was really rolling at this point. But I couldn't stop. I kept re-dosing every 45 minutes or so. By the time I took my last dose at about 3:15AM, I had done a full 1.0G or possibly more of this Molly. It was SO, SO incredibly stupid. I know that now, since I'm in a "normal" state of mind and able to think about it properly.
I'm beginning to get very worried.
For starters, I thought I was going to pass out from overheating. My friends and I had been drinking water throughout the night, but I was SWEATING from dancing so much. When the lights came on at the end, my entire shirt was soaked. Then we had to go down to retrieve our coats from coat check, and there were 2,000 people stuffed down there and NO AIR CONDITIONING. After about 10 minutes down there I decided I couldn't handle it, thought I was going to pass out so I ran outside. This was NYC in January, it was about 15 degrees outside and all I had on was a soaking wet t-shirt, but I was so hot that it felt good and cooled me down.
By the time I got home at 5AM, my eyes were just HUGE and my jaw was clenched like a fist. I couldn't help it - I looked like a monster. I smoked a little bit of weed, drank a few beers and crawled in bed with the hopes of falling asleep. It didn't happen. I think I finally fell asleep at about 7AM-9AM. When I woke up at 9AM my eyes were still huge. Then I was up again until about 12PM, and couldn't take it anymore - I ate 1.0mg of Xanax, even though I was uncomfortable with it, and passed out from 12PM-5PM. That night, I fell asleep at 9:30PM and slept until about 8:30AM the next morning.
This whole week has been HORRIBLE. Monday I was an emotional rollercoaster, depressed all day mostly, couldn't smile or anything. On top of that, my mind just wasn't functioning properly. Felt like I was seeing the world through a cloud in my head, and I'm usually sharp as a tack. Tuesday was not much better, maybe even worse. Wednesday was GREAT - I woke up whistling, singing in my head, prancing around. I was finally HAPPY again. This lasted until about 5PM, and then I got kind of depressed again. Today is Thursday, and I must say that my mood is MUCH improved. Only a few hours throughout the day do I get anxious, and it's mostly related to the main problem:
My mind is still not functioning properly. I am forgetful, and I still have that "cloudy" or "dull" feeling, like I'm not as smart as I used to be. I poured a cup of coffee today, and it tasted TERRIBLE. I couldn't figure out why. It wasn't until 5 minutes later that I realized - not only had I completely forgotten to add sugar, but it took me 5 minutes to relate the fact that the coffee tasted bad to the fact that it lacked sugar!! I was totally shocked and upset. My brain is clearly not working as well as it should.
It's been about 5 days since I ate that last molly. Again, I'm not too worried about the mood. I think that's going to be 100% better by the end of the week. But my brain function has me a little scared. Do you think this will get better, or might I have induced some kind of permanent brain/nerve damage? I know it was just way too much MDMA for one night.
Any help, advice, words of encouragement - ANYTHING - is immensely appreciated. Thank you ALL in advance.
