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Advice on Treatment for Heroin

i have used methoxetamine and 4meopcp both nmda antagonists, long acting, to get off of opiates pain free. bc they are dissociatives u may need to watch ur dosage and have a baby sitter in case u take too much and get too crazy. but i figured 2-3 days of crazy compared to suicidal depression and a physical addiction to opiates is worth it. i'd be on it now, but i am literally policed by someone who cares about me and doesnt understand anything about drugs 24/7 so im on the methadone thing. but i always know there are dissociatvies so i do not fear the w/d as long as im on methadone short term.
 
regardless of how they work, using potent disso/deleriant substances to kick junk is too risky. the only one I'd utilize in a limited, post-acute phase would be MXE. But honestly, many of the desired effects of MXE are nicely approximated by higher doses of pregabalin.... without falling into the mixy-hole.

I could actually function on lyrica; while avoiding nasty side-effects, or a new dependence on maintenance opiates.
 
Bad news. I lasted about two weeks and I'm back on. I work a lot, like 60 hours a week, and what makes it most difficult for me to quit is literally not having the time to be sick. I cannot be at work and be dopesick, i just can't do it. I need 3 solid days of doing nothing but feeling like crap before I can function. This is the main thing that keeps my periods of use so long, is avoiding being sick. I'll tell myself "OK, i'll stop this weekend and spend those days detoxing" and then I get paid saturday and it turns into "OK, next weekend".
Maybe I should get some suboxone to help me through this? I find i still get sick switching from dope to subs, but after about 24 hrs i feel fine.
Maybe I should really try to throw myself into the NA thing and try that again. I just, ugh.. hate it. Sitting around talking about using just makes me want to get high.
I think i'll try both. Because, obviously, just quitting and letting that be that isnt working. Sepher said something about coming to a point where you'll find a way no matter what.. Its just dealing with not going back on it! I'm so frustrated with myself.
 
Just an update - made it four months then relapsed. I'm going to end up on a long-term bupinorphine maintenance plan... can't deny your brain chemistry. I've messed mine up and need help and suboxone does that for me.
 
I disagree with all of you people saying that you "can't deny your brain chemistry." These fucking doctors really don't know shit, they're so okay with telling a 15 year old kid he's going to need to be on suboxone for the rest of his life. People go on methadone and suboxone and stay on it for the rest of their lives, if you ask me this isn't really living. Trust me, you CAN live a life completely drug free and enjoy it, and no it will not be easy. You say you gave NA/AA a chance but it didn't work, but were you 110% committed? Getting clean isn't something that is just going to fall in your lap, you have to work for your recovery, reach out and take control. Maybe 12 step just isn't for you. I know you work 60 hours a week but when it comes to your life I think that is a little more important. If you're a chronic relapser which I am then maybe you should consider inpatient treatment and not a bullshit 28 day program. Long term treatment can be a viable option. I lived in a therapeutic community for a long time and it changed my life, and yes it was scary looking at a new life without drugs but I'm forever grateful. My life is completely different now. Its good to get away from the neighborhood and the surroundings for a while too, it helps cravings to not be around that stuff. Life at a therapeutic community maybe strict and you may not understand a lot of things but just have trust and faith because those places work if you put the work in.
 
hey josie, have you tried the church thing? it's all about finding a power greater than yourself. it doesn't have to be a 'faith' based type of higher power. it can be anything you make of it, for example with me my higher power is god, now its a god of my understanding, so my 'higher power' is so much different then the god you hear about in religions. I started going to church to learn about 'faith', and i like reading the Psalms from the bible just because it talks so much about building a relationship with my higher power. try this, hit up a place that sells cross necklaces, or something that will remind you about someone greater than yourself. I bought some prayer beads and it has a cross on the bottom, even tho i'm not Catholic, i really like prayer, and hearing about a power greater then myself.
find something that works for you, and it doesn't at all have to be Jesus, or any of the other guys. All it has to be is something you can talk to regardless of the situations that your in. i know it will work out for you, just takes time to find that spiritual awaking, i know that it's possible. hang in there josie, and don't forget to pray!
 
I was raised in church all my life, i believe in a god and a greater power but it really just comes down to you. YOU HAVE TO WANT TO QUIT FOR YOURSELF, suboxone, methadone, clonidine wont do it for you, your mind,soul and body HAVE TO WANT TO QUIT... i wish you all the best of luck and hope you get to that point someday
 
Hrubenstein said:
I disagree with all of you people saying that you "can't deny your brain chemistry." These fucking doctors really don't know shit, they're so okay with telling a 15 year old kid he's going to need to be on suboxone for the rest of his life. People go on methadone and suboxone and stay on it for the rest of their lives, if you ask me this isn't really living. Trust me, you CAN live a life completely drug free and enjoy it, and no it will not be easy.
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I agree, problem is finding a doctor that will structurally taper you off the subs, and anything else they have you on. Luckily my doctor is one of these people, first words out of her mouth was " I do not want you using anything to get through life " She has started me on 4mg a day, and in 2 weeks time, i will taper down to 2mg, then in a month i will taper off to 1mg, then stop completely, as long as your body readjusts to the new dosage completely stopping wont be as bad, and the w/d's if any will be kept to a minimum
 
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