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SLR Moderators: Senior Staff
Addicted together
- Thread starter lukeblue
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Captain.Heroin
Bluelight Crew
dankstersauce
Bluelighter
Using relationships are FUN.....although they usually end in varying degrees of disaster. IME I definitely use more dope if I'm with a girl who uses and the scamming and scheming is like 10x that of being single. And if one person quits and other doesn't, it's just a matter of time before one person drags down the other. It's madness but it is fun. It's definitely not a good foundation for a relationship tho.
I might be able to date a girl who never used but I don't think it would work out. At the same time relationships with other addicts doesn't seem to work out either. So for me, I think I gotta find a balance in between.
I might be able to date a girl who never used but I don't think it would work out. At the same time relationships with other addicts doesn't seem to work out either. So for me, I think I gotta find a balance in between.
Monkeybizness
Bluelighter
i wouldent say im an addict cause i dont really use hard drugs . just alot of X , and weed and coke at times, some mushrooms here and there ..
&.
i dont know but me and my boyfriend do everything together and we are extremely attached and close .. i dont get high with out him and neither does he . i dont think i would get the same high if i did . were best friends and also i could say drug buddies .. its just a different level of relationship, its brought us closer in some weird way... i cant really explain it to people who dont do drugs,,, but were closer to each other then all / most sober couples iv meet .. its a completely different level of trust and comfortability that you have with the person .. you dont have to hide anything at all .. and most probly when your open like that with drugs pretty much your open with everything else .. your true side usually comes out
&.
i dont know but me and my boyfriend do everything together and we are extremely attached and close .. i dont get high with out him and neither does he . i dont think i would get the same high if i did . were best friends and also i could say drug buddies .. its just a different level of relationship, its brought us closer in some weird way... i cant really explain it to people who dont do drugs,,, but were closer to each other then all / most sober couples iv meet .. its a completely different level of trust and comfortability that you have with the person .. you dont have to hide anything at all .. and most probly when your open like that with drugs pretty much your open with everything else .. your true side usually comes out
qwe
Bluelight Crew
^drugs have definately brought me and mine closer as well. whether it's profound revelations about her life brought on by ecstasy that before she forced herself not to realize, or a cuddly vacation on opiates. we tend to only use drugs together as well (except i also use weed, and she doesnt use weed, so i use weed either alone or with friends). she's too scared to try mushrooms unfortunately
i am dependent on opiates (92mg methadone), am about to do a suboxone taper. but i never do anything like "scamming and scheming" like a poster above mentioned, and the only way my addiction is disruptive to my relationship is the way i fall asleep when we are laying down together (if i took more opiates than usual)
i'm her only drug source, and before me she was drug naive, so i make sure she never uses more than once a week (opiates). ecstasy we've only acquired twice. so don't worry, i'm not getting somebody else addicted, especially after what i went / am going through
i am dependent on opiates (92mg methadone), am about to do a suboxone taper. but i never do anything like "scamming and scheming" like a poster above mentioned, and the only way my addiction is disruptive to my relationship is the way i fall asleep when we are laying down together (if i took more opiates than usual)
i'm her only drug source, and before me she was drug naive, so i make sure she never uses more than once a week (opiates). ecstasy we've only acquired twice. so don't worry, i'm not getting somebody else addicted, especially after what i went / am going through
Z Y G G Y
Bluelighter
I'd say there is a very big difference b/w both people being addicted together and only one person being addicted. Most people who have responded here don't have the experience of a couple being addicted together.
I think that if both of the people are addicted together or are recovering addicts there is much more understanding for mistakes and actions. Someone who was never addicted can never understand an addict fully. If both people experienced addiction and love each other there is much more support and understanding of the struggles.
At least thats how it is for my relationship. I'm pretty sure that if we weren't addicted together we wouldn't have lasted together. If I never got addicted or he never got addicted, the non-addicted person would have left the addicted person. But since we both went through it, we had a much greater understanding of how hard it actually is to be addicted and how when it seems that u r not trying, u r really trying hard as hell.
I know he won't say to me "oh, I never got addicted, why did u, I can stop anytime, why can't u" but will instead look at my actions with compassion and understanding that a non addict can't. I really do believe wholeheartedly that walking the shoes of an addict really makes you look differently at human weakness and makes u judge less. Unless u walk the road yourself, its hard to have much compassion and its much easier to judge.
My relationship has survived our mutual drug addiction. There is so much love that we have for one another. There were many reasons for us to not be together. Most couples would have broken up for sure over things that have happened. The drugs have not been something that kept us closer together, if anything they were definitely a damaging force, but sometimes love is strong enough that it survives the worst of situations. I know neither one of us would have stayed with someone else after all that happened b/w us.
I think that if both of the people are addicted together or are recovering addicts there is much more understanding for mistakes and actions. Someone who was never addicted can never understand an addict fully. If both people experienced addiction and love each other there is much more support and understanding of the struggles.
At least thats how it is for my relationship. I'm pretty sure that if we weren't addicted together we wouldn't have lasted together. If I never got addicted or he never got addicted, the non-addicted person would have left the addicted person. But since we both went through it, we had a much greater understanding of how hard it actually is to be addicted and how when it seems that u r not trying, u r really trying hard as hell.
I know he won't say to me "oh, I never got addicted, why did u, I can stop anytime, why can't u" but will instead look at my actions with compassion and understanding that a non addict can't. I really do believe wholeheartedly that walking the shoes of an addict really makes you look differently at human weakness and makes u judge less. Unless u walk the road yourself, its hard to have much compassion and its much easier to judge.
My relationship has survived our mutual drug addiction. There is so much love that we have for one another. There were many reasons for us to not be together. Most couples would have broken up for sure over things that have happened. The drugs have not been something that kept us closer together, if anything they were definitely a damaging force, but sometimes love is strong enough that it survives the worst of situations. I know neither one of us would have stayed with someone else after all that happened b/w us.
kohlbea
Greenlighter
my fiance and I have dabbled with various drugs for the last three years in our relationship - always have been exceptionally functional users (both had full time jobs, cars, good home, etc). Recently, we dove pretty deep into iv speedball use (heroin & cocaine) - in the past we have always kept ourselves in check & responsible, but we are having a hard time getting straight from this one - just wondering if anyone has advice or some positive & intelligent input
indicameds
Bluelighter
I just had to quote this..hahaha get real, you may just be a rec user but coke and X unless its mdma and not some meth pill sold as X on the street, are HARD drugs.
badboybrian
Bluelight Crew
pretty much co-sign on what everyone has been saying. ive been in a relationship when both myself and my other half were highly habitual. relationship was super fun, sex was great, but it inevitably spun a downward spiral and fast.
im currently in a relationship where both myself and my current other half are sort of social users. we're not completely clean but when we do partake, it is very few and far between. i feel that there is that certain level of closeness and understanding, when both parties can say "hey, i've been there".
back to the topic at hand, a relationship with one user and not both will be a very challenging one to keep. not saying it wont work, but definitely expect alot of stress, heartbreaking, and loss of hope in the process. #justsaying
im currently in a relationship where both myself and my current other half are sort of social users. we're not completely clean but when we do partake, it is very few and far between. i feel that there is that certain level of closeness and understanding, when both parties can say "hey, i've been there".
back to the topic at hand, a relationship with one user and not both will be a very challenging one to keep. not saying it wont work, but definitely expect alot of stress, heartbreaking, and loss of hope in the process. #justsaying
I am asking myself this question for a long time. Can you really say you understand fully any aspect of another person's views or feelings? Addiction or not, we are all alone in our heads. Love, care, even intelligence are what makes people understand and not that much similar experience. I say similar because even if we live one same moment together, the experience is always different.
I don't know, maybe I will never find an answer to this question. I have the feeling we only get glimpses from the other people, no matter how close we are and what we lived together.
Monkeybizness
Bluelighter
uhhhhhh.. heroin, meth, opiets, FUCKING CRACK those are real hard drugs that can be abused and you can become very DEPENDENT of them
and yes my pills are legit... i don't take shitty pills
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/showthread.php?t=476148
coke is only for the club prob. onces every two months we don't like it much , just cant drink with out ,
the only thing i feel we did abuse is ecstasy intaking a few times a week.. for a few months but you can only do that for so long befor you start to feel pretty retarded ETARDED lol.. so yeaah were taking our break ..
basically im into love drugs. pills ALOT, weed ALOT, shrooms , lsd .. were kinnda like HIPPIES ..
the point is I DONT DO DRUGS WITH OUT MY BABE
Cocaine is a hard drug.
In the defense of Monkeybizness, many people do coke and form habitual use when they are out or around other people... but not an actual addiction. For that reason, many people don't consider it a hard drug. When I first started experimenting with drugs at clubs when I was 17/18... I thought that cocaine was actually a 'lighter' drug than MDMA, speed or even weed because the effects aren't as overpowering. I was obviously very wrong.
In the defense of Monkeybizness, many people do coke and form habitual use when they are out or around other people... but not an actual addiction. For that reason, many people don't consider it a hard drug. When I first started experimenting with drugs at clubs when I was 17/18... I thought that cocaine was actually a 'lighter' drug than MDMA, speed or even weed because the effects aren't as overpowering. I was obviously very wrong.
PriestTheyCalledHim
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 7, 2005
- Messages
- 14,714
It depends on lots of factors.
I'm not addicted to illegal drugs but I do know people who met while in treatment and they both got sober, stayed sober and are currently still sober, and eventually got married.
I've also seen relationships where two people are addicted and using constantly and it brings both people down so they both never stop using, and one person gets addicted to another drug besides their main DOC.
I'm not addicted to illegal drugs but I do know people who met while in treatment and they both got sober, stayed sober and are currently still sober, and eventually got married.
I've also seen relationships where two people are addicted and using constantly and it brings both people down so they both never stop using, and one person gets addicted to another drug besides their main DOC.
brandonerr
Bluelighter
Anything other than weed is pretty much a hard drug, it's mostly based on weather you did it long enough to become addicted or not. So most of the time "hard drugs" are what we make them out to be.
dizzychainsaw
Bluelighter
Me and my boyfriend are both addicted to pain pills and I admit that it does cause problems in our relationship. I also think that we are closer because we share the addiction. He is prescribed the pain pills but he supplies me with some. When we first got together it wasn't a big deal. I had actually been clean from opiates for a while when we met but I ended up addicted to them again now.
I am trying to get clean and it is really hard since I know the pills are here. He hides his pills from me sometimes and gets mad if I find them and take a couple. We get into arguments over them. Sometimes it seems like he uses my addiction against me. He knew I was a recovering addict when we met. I have thought about what would happen between us if I did quit. I wonder how I would feel about him then.
He has admitted to me that he doesn't need all the pills he is prescribed but he won't admit that he is an addict. It seems like he thinks it is ok because he is prescribed to them.
I am trying to get clean and it is really hard since I know the pills are here. He hides his pills from me sometimes and gets mad if I find them and take a couple. We get into arguments over them. Sometimes it seems like he uses my addiction against me. He knew I was a recovering addict when we met. I have thought about what would happen between us if I did quit. I wonder how I would feel about him then.
He has admitted to me that he doesn't need all the pills he is prescribed but he won't admit that he is an addict. It seems like he thinks it is ok because he is prescribed to them.
Pillthrill
Bluelighter
Kinda. Not so much lying in my case. It was more about hiding it from them. Doing it when they aren't around. But now I live with my bf and we are honest about everything. Often do the drugs together. And there would be no hiding it if you want to and you live with someone, they eventually find out. I tend to have a huge dose of guilt and tell. I can't lie to save my life anyway.
Relationships are based on honesty... so even 'not telling' is being dishonest because it leads to other lies. If both people are drug users, there should be no reason to hide it from one another because you understand the other person's need/desire to use.
In my case now, I feel like we're doing a really good job at keeping each other in check and making sure it doesn't get out of hand. In beginning it did... but I suppose we all learn from our mistakes.
In my case now, I feel like we're doing a really good job at keeping each other in check and making sure it doesn't get out of hand. In beginning it did... but I suppose we all learn from our mistakes.
unsettled
Bluelighter
the only relationships I've had in the past we're "addict" relationships, where we spent the majority of our time together under the influence of something. Most of them were alot of fun, but I did find they all ended once somebody decided to get sober or life got too "real" for a while. So, while they are alot of fun I don't think they usually last, but I'm sure there are exceptions.
Drugs aren't great for relationships, I've been learning that the hard way! I've always put my music ahead of everything else in my life, even drugs, and that has destroyed just as many relationships as drugs. I've got a lot of growing up to do if I ever want to have a sober long term relationship.
Drugs aren't great for relationships, I've been learning that the hard way! I've always put my music ahead of everything else in my life, even drugs, and that has destroyed just as many relationships as drugs. I've got a lot of growing up to do if I ever want to have a sober long term relationship.