Hi, I will try to put some inside of my past-present life with the use/abuse of Amphetamines.
19.11.2000 was the date when I first tried Amphetamine. I still remember the night vividly me on rave jumping all night long.
Next year and a half my usage was once every 10 months. Then later on it became more often, every weekend when going out., and it lasted like that until the 2010s. With spiking with more often usage in the middle of years 2010 to 2015. More often was when I was between jobs and I noticed at that time as well nowadays that whenever I was engaged with working steadily, with overtime that I preferred to I only was using going out. But in times being between jobs lots of free time then a worm in the ass and my fucking alter ego always kicked in let´s have some fun.
But back then I always was an active sporty guy whenever couldn't sleep, I just took my bike and went for a ride in the middle of the night. 2-3 hours later sleeper like a baby.
Then I moved abroad to another country being lucky to get a good job and new fresh start to build my career, as my home country is a beautiful but corrupt shitland.
There I had a break where I didn`t have cravings or crises and had to find a connection, just work, sport, sleep repeat. That lasted 2 years then by a combination of circumstances I found a good connection and again I started with using when I wanted I did when I didn't want I did not use, and stuff was in the deep part of my fridge.
During Covid time shits spiralled a bit I must confess, as I wanted to suppress all the stupidity around me with that year and a half being bombarded from every possible side, either on the work or back at my home address where I moved in 2015 from my homeland.
So as mainly I worked abroad, my usage of Amphetamines became more and more sometimes almost daily.
Then Christmas 2022 I was home doing some furniture assembly, and after one line snorted and had some stupid feeling alongside not feeling that super kick that I used to have in the past so many times.
Started to think and I just decided that fuck this shit and stuff from my fridge, went to my fridge took my stash bring it to the bathroom and threw it all to the drain, never regretted it.
My whole 2023 year I didn't even think to call my connection whom I could always contact, going to buy and get wasted... The whole year passed with me being so active in my free time away from work, as I spent time in the Alps either hiking, mountain biking or snowboarding.
Last 6 months again that worm of being a restless IDIOT as I have been dealing with some personal work problems, every 3-4 days I went on 2-3 days of abuse, without sleep. What comes afterwards, sleep sleep sleep. I also never had a problem eating or forcing myself to put smh in my belly.
But one thing I never broke and that is the use of any type of sleep, depression or pain medication. NEVER EVER:
Even so, I abused Amphetamines since December almost daily, I also went to Austria Snowboarding every month between December and May as Gletschers are open almost until summer in Austria.
Just to mention since I became a working citizen back in my homeland, now almost 10 years living abroad as a foreigner yearly I am performing medical checks nowadays, especially in my industry checks being more thoroughly performed, with Ergometry (performance test) with results in my age category being in the upper part.
Also, I have never been sick heavier than a simple cold or a couple of years in the first part of the millennium having problems with early spring allergies that spiralled to mild bronchitis I had last time in 2007. Also during Covid time, I tested positive for being sick for 2-3 days of weird symptoms.
I never smoked or drank heavily except a bit for some early years of raving but that stopped a long time ago, last 15 years even beer I during less time than a number of my arm fingers so yes only sin would be Amphetamine.
Healthy wise or psychological I will say that I noticed 2 things on my nowadays.
Short-term memory I noticed that I have a problem always forgetting some stupid small things, another downside is that after I use Amphetamines even afterwards having a long nice sleep, the days that are in front of me will be me sleepy even after a full night's sleep whenever I find myself on same place sitting home, in my office. In office work, I can deal with that but at home, I just sleep all night long, then a couple of hours awake but fall asleep through the whole day. And that can last 2-3 days afterwards my dance with Dutch lady A if I don't engage myself in some sports activities....
I even didn't lose a shit ton of my weight as I can eat always, if not when high not because I can't eat but because I forgot myself sometimes. Trying to force myself even just a little bit by eating some chocolate, juicy ice cream, and sometimes fruits...or preparing some protein shake from Dymatize.
Healhywise still feeling ok and yes soonish my relationship with Amphetamines will stop.
So after all this shit I wrote about me, my advice on how to stop or try it would be (from my point of view how easily I stopped at least for some time longer than 1 month):
Try to engage yourself more with working and doing activities that you like in your free time so that way forget to use or get cravings. At least that was in my case a couple of times I stopped taking a break from Amph, since I started using.
That's why I say my advice would be to you. The biggest mind issue in my case of using- not using is that whenever I am bored and free workfree home, not engaged with usual activities outside, then every time my butt-worm IVAN starts with sweatalk ear whispering and sucker me never saying no. As I am pussy
