abstinence

Second day of trying to stay alcohol free was as unsuccessful as yesterday. Today I started early, against my better judgement (because it always makes me feel like hell), and by 7 PM it turned into an additional 8 oz of vodka, as near as I can estimate.

The irony is that my DOC's, kratom and GBL, are unobtainable for financial reasons, yet neither are as harmful to me as booze. The last few times I've run out of GBL I've gone directly to alcohol, and am now aware of how badly it's effecting me. My sleep, which is bad to begin with, is shorter and less restful than ever. I'm nauseated for long periods during the day, and my appetite is best when I've had a few shots. I've become completely lethargic during the day, doing the bare minimum of schoolwork/responsibilities.

Tomorrow I absolutely need to shape up and get it together. I'm going to try exercising to keep me away from the alcohol for 24 hours. Really hope I can keep off it.

 

Good luck, man! Don't beat yourself up too hard, getting clean is tough as hell. You're not cold-turkeying off GBL though, are you? Normally I wouldn't suggest this, but having a few shots of alcohol a day would certainly be a good idea, actually. Then taper down nice and smooth.

Remember to forgive yourself-- we're all human, and none of us perfect.