Druidus
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 28, 2006
- Messages
- 598
Ever since I was young, I've had this pain/pressure/serious-discomfort that comes and goes and is located in my lower left abdomen. It is much worse in the morning, and it actually made me incapable of eating at several points in my life. Sometimes it feels like it's in my intestines (needing to defecate makes it much worse - but it also seems that this thing constipates me- and sometimes in the whole muscle region as well. Often, the pulse going through a large blood vessel in the area causes the pain to intensify each time blood pulses through it. It is a strange feeling, and I've never felt it anywhere else. I lived with it constantly, not knowing it was even out of the ordinary, until losing some 80 pounds due to being unable to eat. It's not nausea, but it just makes food completely out of the question, taking away my entire appetite. It makes me have trouble staying asleep, because I'll wake up because of it, and EVERY fucking morning is hell at first because that's when it's at its worst.
There are only a few things that alleviate this torment for me. Heat and pressure on the site seem to make it go away for the most part, but as soon as I remove the heat/pressure it comes back to taunt me again.
The reason I post this in Other Drugs is because drugs have an affect on this pain/discomfort, and I thought that maybe if I describe how different ones affect the sensation I might learn what it could be from other posters. Before I continue, I'll say now that I've repeatedly sought medical help for this, and not one Dr. was able to offer an explanation or treat it.
When I smoke cannabis, the sensation does not go away completely, but it is dulled to the point that it really doesn't matter. This lasts for up to three hours after smoking cannabis, even after the high is diminished. It was cannabis that saved me after losing those 80 pounds. When I started smoking it, the sensation was alleviated, and I could eat again.
When I take benzodiazepines, enough of them, then it goes away completely, or at least I'm able to completely forget about it. If I drink, though, it comes back, though not full force. Drinking without benzos aggravates it, but I'm usually smoking pot when I drink, so it's not so bad.
When I take opiates (I always IV my opiates), it is INSTANTLY obliterated. There is no pain at all when I use an opiate, no terribly uncomfortable sensation. The sensation comes back usually after a good 5-10 hours, depending on the opiate used and the dose I take. This was part of why I became addicted to hydromorphone for two years; I was sick of battling it with just pot, which didn't last long enough.
Psychedelics make the sensation fade and then come back, but with one difference. The sensation starts to feel GOOD. Mushrooms, for instance, will reduce the pain over the come up and then start to seemingly infuse the area with pleasure instead of intense physical dysphoria. This lasts for 2-3 days after the mushrooms, with the pleasure and goodness of the sensation slowly reverting back to the torturous norm.
Dextromethorphan makes it worse, especially the day after I dose it. Ketamine, however, did not have this effect, and seemed to just remove it from my awareness.
Tobacco has no effect at all, except it reduces the pain felt when shitting and makes the process easier, likely due to stimulation from the nicotine.
Amphetamine, by far, has the most positive effect on it (except for the days after mushrooms). When I take amphetamines, then I've got some 24-36 hours without the sensation, and even if it does arise, it's barely noticeable and recedes again rapidly.
So why do I feel the sensation in the first place? Does anyone else have anything like this? And why do drugs affect it like they do? I honestly have no fucking clue, and so I hope someone more knowledgeable than I will be kind enough to elucidate me on this matter.
If you need more details, I will post answers to questions posed. Please don't just tell me to go to a Dr., I've tried that many times, and they think it's either nothing or that I'm exaggerating it.
Here's another overview of the symptoms, if it helps:
It is located in the lower left quadrant of my abdomen, a small distance to the left of my naval. The pain increases whenever blood pumps through a vein/artery located around the sensation. The sensation constipates me, but also makes me feel like I need to use the bathroom, even when my bowels are empty. If I do take a shit, it gets worse while straining, then feels briefly better, before going back to pain (and making me feel like I still need to shit). It doesn't cause nausea, but it does cause anorexia. It dominates my perceptions when at its worst. I literally cannot function when it is too intense. At that point, I'm generally just moaning and rocking back and forth (the pressure from my abdominal muscles helps). Heat relieves it, and so does pressure, but heat is the best remedy. The pain itself is dull, throbbing, and goes up and down in intensity. It is accompanied by a sense of "cold" inside that part of my body, as if it is uncomfortably cold INSIDE my abdomen. It is most severe in the morning, after I wake up.
There's ONE more thing that alleviates the sensation. Apparently, orgasm works like a charm, and leaves the sensation reduced largely for up to 20-30 minutes. At the point of orgasm, it's almost as good at dramatically relieving my pain as the rush of an IV opiate.
That's about the best I can describe it. Please, any ideas are good ideas, I really need to figure this out. I'm sick of my only real relief coming from drugs that cost me money and are potentially hazardous to my health. Hopefully someone else has similar symptoms, or knows why drugs seem to affect it (which would point me in the right direction). It feels like I want to fucking tear that chunk of my abdomen out to get rid of this, it literally feels that bad.
Thanks, OD Bluelight posters.
There are only a few things that alleviate this torment for me. Heat and pressure on the site seem to make it go away for the most part, but as soon as I remove the heat/pressure it comes back to taunt me again.
The reason I post this in Other Drugs is because drugs have an affect on this pain/discomfort, and I thought that maybe if I describe how different ones affect the sensation I might learn what it could be from other posters. Before I continue, I'll say now that I've repeatedly sought medical help for this, and not one Dr. was able to offer an explanation or treat it.
When I smoke cannabis, the sensation does not go away completely, but it is dulled to the point that it really doesn't matter. This lasts for up to three hours after smoking cannabis, even after the high is diminished. It was cannabis that saved me after losing those 80 pounds. When I started smoking it, the sensation was alleviated, and I could eat again.
When I take benzodiazepines, enough of them, then it goes away completely, or at least I'm able to completely forget about it. If I drink, though, it comes back, though not full force. Drinking without benzos aggravates it, but I'm usually smoking pot when I drink, so it's not so bad.
When I take opiates (I always IV my opiates), it is INSTANTLY obliterated. There is no pain at all when I use an opiate, no terribly uncomfortable sensation. The sensation comes back usually after a good 5-10 hours, depending on the opiate used and the dose I take. This was part of why I became addicted to hydromorphone for two years; I was sick of battling it with just pot, which didn't last long enough.
Psychedelics make the sensation fade and then come back, but with one difference. The sensation starts to feel GOOD. Mushrooms, for instance, will reduce the pain over the come up and then start to seemingly infuse the area with pleasure instead of intense physical dysphoria. This lasts for 2-3 days after the mushrooms, with the pleasure and goodness of the sensation slowly reverting back to the torturous norm.
Dextromethorphan makes it worse, especially the day after I dose it. Ketamine, however, did not have this effect, and seemed to just remove it from my awareness.
Tobacco has no effect at all, except it reduces the pain felt when shitting and makes the process easier, likely due to stimulation from the nicotine.
Amphetamine, by far, has the most positive effect on it (except for the days after mushrooms). When I take amphetamines, then I've got some 24-36 hours without the sensation, and even if it does arise, it's barely noticeable and recedes again rapidly.
So why do I feel the sensation in the first place? Does anyone else have anything like this? And why do drugs affect it like they do? I honestly have no fucking clue, and so I hope someone more knowledgeable than I will be kind enough to elucidate me on this matter.
If you need more details, I will post answers to questions posed. Please don't just tell me to go to a Dr., I've tried that many times, and they think it's either nothing or that I'm exaggerating it.
Here's another overview of the symptoms, if it helps:
It is located in the lower left quadrant of my abdomen, a small distance to the left of my naval. The pain increases whenever blood pumps through a vein/artery located around the sensation. The sensation constipates me, but also makes me feel like I need to use the bathroom, even when my bowels are empty. If I do take a shit, it gets worse while straining, then feels briefly better, before going back to pain (and making me feel like I still need to shit). It doesn't cause nausea, but it does cause anorexia. It dominates my perceptions when at its worst. I literally cannot function when it is too intense. At that point, I'm generally just moaning and rocking back and forth (the pressure from my abdominal muscles helps). Heat relieves it, and so does pressure, but heat is the best remedy. The pain itself is dull, throbbing, and goes up and down in intensity. It is accompanied by a sense of "cold" inside that part of my body, as if it is uncomfortably cold INSIDE my abdomen. It is most severe in the morning, after I wake up.
There's ONE more thing that alleviates the sensation. Apparently, orgasm works like a charm, and leaves the sensation reduced largely for up to 20-30 minutes. At the point of orgasm, it's almost as good at dramatically relieving my pain as the rush of an IV opiate.
That's about the best I can describe it. Please, any ideas are good ideas, I really need to figure this out. I'm sick of my only real relief coming from drugs that cost me money and are potentially hazardous to my health. Hopefully someone else has similar symptoms, or knows why drugs seem to affect it (which would point me in the right direction). It feels like I want to fucking tear that chunk of my abdomen out to get rid of this, it literally feels that bad.
Thanks, OD Bluelight posters.
