A Nice Day Off

Today, Donna called to say hello and check up on me since we haven't seen or spoken to each other in a coupla weeks. I have a bit of a crush on her (she's the girl I mention in this entry) and she was a significant part of me getting back into recovery from 'relapse' into a painful IV coke habit.

Anyway, we ended up going to the mall together so she could make some exchanges. It was a good time! I dig shopping and I think she enjoyed the fact that I kinda know some things about clothes (surprise surprise everyone!)

We were walking through the mall and saw a dude that had a mental affliction of some sort grabbing a crumpled bag of thrown out fast food from the trash. Donna asked 'Are you hungry, baby?' the dude said 'yes' so we went to his favorite burger place in the food court and got him a burger, fries and a drink.

After leaving him we rolled out to Philly to make a meeting. We got there late (at the end of the initial readings) and as we walked in the door someone asked Donna if she would share. She accepted in a humble manner.

I had never been to this meeting and it was HUGE! There were maybe 80 or 90 people there and it was REAL refreshing. I was emotionally impacted by watching so many different folks getting together to achieve a common goal... another day clean.

Donna is a real deep chick and has a heart full of compassion that is tempered with a nice edge. She's also sexy as shit!!!! and she shared an awesome message of experience, strength and hope

After the meeting we were driving back to our area and Donna got a phone call. My sponsor's wife's son just died and everyone was at the hospital to support her. This woman just lost her brother 4 months ago and her mother 2 months ago. Now, her 25 year old son died from sickle cell, pneumonia and something else. I can't imagine the pain she is going through. Alll these deaths at once and now her son has passed.

We met everyone at the hospital to support her and then rolled out to my sponsor and sponsor's wife's apartment (bringing pizza and soda for everyone)

We stayed for an hour or so to just be there with her. THIS IS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT. It isn't about us anymore, man. Its about being there for others when needed.

The comaraderie, acceptance, humility, gratitude, compassion, empathy, patience and tolerance that was experienced today was beautiful. I wish the circumstances were different but I guess these painful experiences (sometimes not our own) are required in order to learn.

Please be strong, Stephanie... we got you covered in this time of need

 

Sorry to hear about Stephanie's loss. Very sad.

Sounds like your in a really good place though OD, with really good people...so glad for you that this is happening, you deserve to be experiencing/living the 'real' side of life.

 

thanks, hon... yeah, I was struggling for a couple of days (nicotine withdrawal?) but am feeling better. Its nice to be with a crew of good people who understand each other and help and support each other in a time of need.

It feels good to be able to help as well. If I was still using, i wouldn't be able to help anyone except myself in the efforts to get more drugs.

Stephanie is a strong woman but how much can one take? All anyone can do is be there for her. I never had kids so its impossible to for me to completely understand having to bury your child. Her strength is inspiring

 

That, I think, is one of the big benefits of support groups like 12 step programs: the sense of community. A lot is taken from the group initially, but as one gets stronger and more able to do so, the opportunities to give back are plentiful. And giving support to those who truly and dearly need it feels pretty damn good, doesn't it?

My sympathies to Stephanie and those close to her. No parent should ever have to bury their child.