A.I.D's and youth

[Jabberwocky]

The Cold confusion of helplessness grips me
uncertainty
Praying to gods ive never seen, never quite belived in
Help this one
Just this once
Do something
Her youth brings tears to my eyes
A veteran at 18
She's living life fast
In dog years
I sit waiting, watching her breathe
Holding my own breath as she breaks from her routine
It seems like an eternity of silence
Disturbed by the loud beating of my own heart
Yet she breathes once more
And then another
Each breath more shallow than the last
This one is a fighter
I can see her stubborness,
Her will to live
Reflected in her old haunted eyes
Blue-silver pools of fading light
But somethings are stronger than
hope
love
prayers
They shouldnt be, but they are
The suns rising now
Shrowding her frail body in its early morning glow
Showing her a path away from pain
away from confusion
She draws one last breath and says, "i love you"
weakly
Her words flow up into the sunlight
Carrying with them her old woman's soul
As my tears cling to her body
I pray one last time
"God, take me instead"
-phil-

 

[Dagny]

Baby, I don't know quite what to say. So intense, personal, beautiful, hauntingly so. To be loved the way that your words say you love her, that's the closest thing that I can imagine to an eternal life. There have been very few times when I have yearned for a god to pray to, something bigger than me to work for - but I know those times. And I know how fast they can take your breath away and leave you screaming into nothingness for anything, anything but this. I love you, so much that it tears me up to know that you must have hurt in your life. I'd take it from you in a second if I could, carry all pain for you, cry the tears instead. But I can't, so I'll be home soon, and you don't ever have to be alone if you don't wish it. I think of your smile and think you must be my heart, looking back at me. Thank you.

 

[Average Whiteboy]

Damn good, my man, damn good. You tell a story while getting a very important point across.

 

[plazma]

Phil, that's one fucking haunting work of pure emotion.

A veteran at 18
She's living life fast
In dog years
That bitter cynicism mixed with anguish brings tears to my eyes, and that's something few have done.
-plaz out-

 

[poezante]

as ive told you once and as i will tell you again - indeed a great one.

 

[for_sho]

I know I already told you this today, but this is a great poem, so good indeed that I had to read it again, and the second time it brought out other feelings and memories. You have real talent.
for_sho

 

[Jungle Bunny]

As unimportant as it may seem to others, this question rings relevant to me. What is the relationship of the two characters within this scribing. The answer changes my perception and my emotional response. If it be a platonic relation it is very "dear". If it be a biological relation it is very "sacrificial". if it be a non-platonic relation then it makes me "curious". If the latter apply- are these events that will foreshadow the narrator? I like I like I like.....

 

[Jabberwocky]

it was my ex girlfriend, this is a different look at a poem i once wrote. its a more mature outlook yet my emotions are still intact after such a long time. i hope this answers your questions. if not i will try to answer it better. so in conclusion it wasnt platonic and it wasnt family yet it hurt more than any of those things could.
-phil-