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13 days later into comedown

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hersheyscookie

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May 9, 2017
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It has been 13 days since I have been in "come down" after a really scary seizure/palpitation type thing the day AFTER I took (night of drinking, and rolled the weekend prior too... stupid.). The whole night I was fine, but the next day all of these scary symptoms came. I have in total been to the ER twice for blood test, chest X-ray and CT, and I went to the neurologist on Monday and they said everything is clear (did a neuro evaluation but no MRI/EEG) and to check back in within 6 weeks.. but I am still having symptoms.

I am staying completely sober, no caffiene, going to work (at first I wasn't), drinking tons of water, taking fish oil, couldn't eat for the first 10 days but now I have my appetite back and eating all natural fruits, veggies, grains, protein, going to the gym, resting and napping when tired, journaling everything, and still living in fear..

Things that have improved:
I can now eat 2 meals a day
My brain does not feel like it is burning/tingling *ALL* the time
I am having less panic attacks and thoughts of impeding death
I can speak to people more

Things that are the same (these come in waves and are not constant):
Still feel weird and disassociated
Random twitches and tingling/pains in head
Feeling weak
Right ear clogged feeling
Blurry vision
I have been yawning a lot now
Have anxiety still not knowing what's going on
Some chest pain (X-ray, vitals, EKG, and blood tests clear)
Some tingling (head, left side of body)

I'm just scared that something is going on in my head that is not good. I know my symptoms are getting better with time, but something still feels really off. However, there are times when I feel COMPLETELY fine. It kind of comes in waves all the symptoms.

Anyone have similar experiences, suggestions, words of wisdom, etc?
 
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I took MDMA the weekend prior, we had done less than ~350 mg in two nights and then I honestly only had a few licks of powder on the 5th. I did take 1/3 to half of an adderall about a few hours before and was drinking all night. My night went from like 11 pm to 4:30 am. The next day, I had this attack where it felt like my heart was racing, all the heat went to my head, and then it felt like my brain honestly caught fire and the world stopped. Not like a brain zap, it was a whole experience.

After that I went to hospital... could not look at myself in the mirror. Sever anxiety, heat attacks, couldn't really make eye contact with people, brain constantly burning and tingling, didn't eat for about 8 days bc I had no appetite.. all my tests came back normal. I was able to sleep a lot.. sometimes I felt downright normal for hours( like day 6 and 8) and then the other days were pretty terrible.

I have never felt more emarrased, mortified, etc. in my life and it's so surreal I feel like I'm living in a dream. Before this I haven't done anything in really years. I'm wondering if I did some serious damage. I already feel better for sure from at least the first week/m, but now progress has slowed down. I'm nervous to over work at the gym too
 
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I know this may be one of the last things you would like to do, but i would recommend going to your gp (or dealer) and getting some valium/ other benzos and just try it, it should make you less anxious and should improve your mood in general. Don't get into taking them everyday though as benzo addiction is horrible, even worse than opiates. Hope your ok, just stay away from stimulants for a while if possible sounds like your brain has been overloaded and needs a break.
 
I had a similar episode almost 2 months ago and have not been the same since. And I also took it along with adderall. It seems that combination does severe amounts of damage to the brain. I have plunged into a deep depression and have constant anxiety.
 
Im sure cotcha will chime in soon saying its not necessarily "brain damage". Or you can just look at his many many past posts about that.

Imo the best bet is to see either a psychiatrist who specializes or knows a lot about the field of pharmacology and neuroendocrinology and get a proper diagnosis.
 
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I'm in the same boat here at day 17 after a foolish binge, even though friends are ok. Gut wrenching depression has gone away after week 1. Brain/eye wooshes/zaps also and nausea seems to be going away too. Current symptoms are:
-confusion, feeling like I've been hit in the head with a shovel
-constant trippy altered state
-jerky motions at times (eyes,limbs,breathing)
-vision messed up, feels like it's hard to focus eyes on a spot as they bounce all over / lag
-dizziness
-messed up spatial awareness
-agitation/anxiety/electric feeling in body
-sensitive to light, sounds - easily startled
-emotional issues - cranky mood, anger easily, stress out about everything
-can't really look people in the eye, stuttering ??
-mild nausea (used to dry heave)
-low mood, boredom, apathy

These wax and wane and at times I feel almost ok. With the help of benzo's I've had a few 100% windows of feeling good.
Can't work at the moment and I'm considering trying an ssri. It does seem to get better, but so slowly.. hard to say as days meld together.
 
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LawyerLife said:
I had a similar episode almost 2 months ago and have not been the same since. And I also took it along with adderall. It seems that combination does severe amounts of damage to the brain. I have plunged into a deep depression and have constant anxiety.
Click to expand...

How helpful :!
 
Same, all of my symptoms are not present at the same time anymore... other times I feel like I'm normal... but then it hits me like a ton of bricks. Whether it's vision, pain, tingles, disorientation, feeling "off." Honestly, I don't feel depressed anymore but I definitely went through the "I ruined my entire life" to the now "I'm not sure if I ruined my life forever." I guess we shall see..

Hopefully time will help our case. Keep me posted.

This whole experience has been an eye opener for me.. I feel lucky to wake up every morning.. I have no desire to pick up anything anymore. One (or a few) night(s) of fun at this stage in my life (mid twenties, career, family, etc) is not worth how I have been feeling these past 2 weeks. I have two jobs and one of them I took off from for the rest of the month in order to rest and recover.

Thank you for the benzo suggestion but I'm going to just try and do this the all natural way.
 
I thought it was getting better and now back to ground zero again... any words of encouragement. Could I survive 15 days if something was very wrong?
 
You might be developing a psychosis or starting to experience a nervous break down. But that's the worst case scenario. I don't think you have mentioned feeling paranoid or having irrational thoughts so maybe i am jumping the gun with that suggestion.

How are you sleeping every night? if your getting good rest a extended stay off the drugs plus healthy living should hopefully help you return to your old self.
 
I don't know, yesterday I was completely okay at work all day and then around 8 pm my symptoms all came back. This morning they were there too.

I'm at the gym now... trying to convince myself I can sweat this and wait this out. I haven't touched a drink, caffiene, drugs (which I rarely did anyways, like I said it was years before this stint). I just can't believe that this is what my life has turned into ...

My sleep has honestly been okay. At first it was very difficult but I am ablw to sleep at night and nap sometimes after work or something.

I feel like just now I was gonna go cross eyed and pass out but nothing happens it was just some weird bizarre feeling and foggy brain like not myself.. if that makes sense
 
Don't worry about setbacks and lol no you're not going psychotic.. By the sound of things you're doing pretty good all things considered. This whole thing seems very familiar to prolonged wd syndrome from ssris. If you're unaware there are people who get serious and debilitating after effects from antidepressants. I would know as I was one of these people...at that time there were 3 active support sites but only one of them seem to remain. I had to taper turtle pace in order to not end up a wreck. I've been recovered for years from that ordeal until my dumb ass decided to dabble with mdma (and god knows what else)... there is some sensitivity to serotonergic drugs going on for sure.

The recovery from ssri wd seemed to follow a pattern of 'windows and waves' meaning the symptoms fluctuate but gradually over weeks months and years get less and less. That is for those who went c/t and didn't reinstate. The best approach seems to be to accept and surrender to whatever comes, flow with it. Struggling just makes it worse. Feel free to see the neurologist but it's very unlikely to bear any fruit.. all the discussions I see on this forum about hpa-axis and is it psychological bla bla it's almost depressingly similar to those forums.
I'm positive about this healing but the time frame worries me. Even here I see people talking about months.. 3-12.. my life would be wrecked... and it's been 3 weeks and already it's getting exhausting. I try to eat well, go outside... but I look like death. And feel it.

Your situation sounds pretty good though, I would bet a month or two you'll be ok seeing as you have moments of being completely okay already and you're able to work.
I'm so violently sick right now I just try to pass the time... jogging, watching videos or just laying in bed eyes closed... closing my eyes seems to help the dizziness, nausea...
Not sure what to do... closing in on 3 weeks and I struggle with doing things like grocery shopping.... I already know I'm hyper sensitive to ssris but am considering trying one. But then I don't know if this can be alleviated by that. It might even make things worse
 
Thank you for responding.... I'm so sorry you're going through this experience as well. I am super hesitant to write on these boards but I feel like the reason people come into them or find them is for some support system. It's like one minute your life was "fine" and now it's turned upside down... at least for me, it's fear of the unknown of what is going on when it happens that scares the fuck out of me.

I'm trying to keep myself as busy as possible, like you said. Today I watched Netflix all day and now I'm at the gym at least for a half hour. Last night I hung at a friends and felt better being around just one person. But then times like Just now I was on the treadmill and it shocked my left hand and now I had like a mini panic anxiety attack my face got very red and it feels like my left hand is all weird now... I just really want this nightmare to be over because like you said- it's exhausting. I hope some of your symptoms become alleviated at least a little bit soon.


I'm honestly just nervous I'm going to suddenly die. I know that sounds like psychosis but it's so scary when the symptoms come on randomly.. I hope like you said that it is an improvement that I don't feel them all the time. I have another neuro appointment on the 25th I don't know if I should bother going, I would like an MRI though to see if there is any physical difference
 
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15 days in is not overly unhewrd of for lingering effects.

Personally, i would, aim to have decent exercise every day for next 2 months minimum.
Eat good food, only good healthy foood. Even if you dont feel like it. Drink green smoothie drinks then.
Abstain from all drugs including alcohol and weed.

Your body and brain need time to repair and heal.

Oh, lastly, stimulants like amphetamines in conuunction with mdma us known to increase neurotoxicity. Try to not combine this in future.
Repair your mind and body and you should recover. I would be hesitant to docthis again though once so much work is needed to rectify
 
Their could also be some issues such as depersonalisation at hand. Ride it out bit longer yet abstaining. Cthen consider talking to GP then correct health professional
 
I'm riding this out tomorrow will be day 20... I go to the gym every day, trying to eat healthy.

Right now my main symptoms are I have localized head pain right at the top of my head that's been for like 3 days now In the same spot. It's hot to the touch... random brief pains in my head/body... today I got nervous because it was by my left arm and then I think I psychosomatic made it in my chest. Who knows. I haven't had a heat flash/brain explosion type thing in a few days. I have felt depersonalized scattered throughout the recent days...

I wasn't sad at first and now it has started to get to me. I feel like these past almost 3 weeks I am waking up, trying to fill my days as much as possible to stay busy, then go to sleep just so that it can be the next day and the next number .. more time "passed." What a crazy experience this is. I am definitely a changed person. I still am so nervous something awful is going to happen but I walk around all day pretty much talking to myself and convincing myself that "I'm going to survive" "if something really bad were to happen it would have happened already" "you're not going to die" to keep myself afloat... I did call and schedule a therapy appointment because I need to talk to someone about this, I'm starting to feel the emptiness and in hiding from everyone.
 
I'm sorry you're going through this as well.. if you wanna PM me you can.. we can support each other bc I think my 2 friends that I'm confiding in are sick of me haha.
 
MDMA never did this kind of thing in the 90s. Also, it was WAY better for me.
 
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