12 Step Breakdown - Step One

[New]

I'm going to attempt to make the 12 Steps accessible through my own viewpoint on the matter. Maybe I'll help someone.

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Step One:We admitted we were powerless over alcohol-that our lives had become unmanageable

Ok, I hated this step. And the ones after it, but we're on this one. I hated this one. I wasn't POWERLESS over alcohol, I was drinking whenever I pleased. It wasn't making me drink it. When I finally approached this step, I translated it a bit, so that it went something like this.

We admitted we were using alcohol self-destructively in a seemingly powerless manner, and as a result of that, our lives had become unmanageable.

Noticed I kept the "we admitted". Important part. You see, the way twelve step programs work is that there are a bunch of people that have had the same issues that you have, and they're willing to help you get over them and listen to your bullshit, as long as you're willing to do the same.

You'll also notice "were" and "had". This is the VITAL section of Step One that most people ignore. Step one is a step of recognition, not resignation. We "WERE using in a seemingly powerless manner" and our lives "HAD become unmanageable", because now we're taking a path to recover. Remember, were, not are.

"Powerless" is a little dicey. I prefer to see this as looking back as to how our live had become unmanageable, which is probably where some of you are if you're even considering AA, because you won't shut up about how much you hate it. It also refers to a certain compulsion to use despite your better judgment, as well as an obsession over thoughts of doing so. Not a reason to recover alone.

"Unmanageable" is a term you best define yourself. If you're powerless over using, but your life isn't breaking down around you, then there's no need to recover, is there?

Step One, have fun.

 

[lasthurrah19]

The fact that you have to translate the step to make it make some sense to you - because the original makes no sense whatsoever - is just the first of many flaws in the twelve steps in my opinion... how many times people said to me, oh yeah it doesn't make sense but this is what it really means... that's called rationalization.

Steppers are very good at rationalizing their 'program' that actually is something they wouldn't want if they took the words in the steps literally.

This is just my opinion and I'm not trying to fight anyone who finds AA or NA helpful. I was just in that world and woke up one day, and now that I use other resources instead of trusting the all knowing wisdom of something written decades ago, that's not even psychologically or rationally sound, I'm doing much better. If it works for you, great, that's awesome... I encourage you to see how YOU have done this work, not AA or NA or your sponsor or the steps. YOU

If I am out of line in expressing this opinion I'm sure you guys will delete it, I'm not trying to start a debate

 

[New]

No, debate is good. There's nothing wrong with debate.

I just find what you said a rather naive thing to say. "If it doesn't originally make sense, there's a problem with it." That's called bullheadedness. I've been studying it for a while. Read as written, it look bad. And I didn't actually change any meaning at all. Read both again.

3,4 methylenedioxy-methamphetamine, diacetylmorphine, Delta-9-tetrahydracannabinol. Perfect English, yet it doesn't make any sense whatsoever unless studied.


Edit:It seems I missed something. This IS how I did my work. I didn't trust in the program. I trusted one person to help me with these steps. The rest is commentary.

 

[Jabberwocky]

lasthurrah19, I have seen Samael's posts for years. I can assure you that I have a super strong assumption of good faith on his part that is based on his posts, not his being on staff or any other factor.

I can accept paradoxical truth of accepting powerlessness to gain power. Truth is often paradoxical.

I have some reservations about--powerless now OR powerless for all time. Humility of step one proportions comes to us all if we live long enough. Especially in TDS everyone ought feel very comfortable in expressing their sincere opinions provided they aren't expressed in a coercive or derisive way. If anyone gets derisive I'm duly authorized to issue bare bottom spankings.

An analysis of the twelve steps that is in depth and insightful will benefit everyone in TDS.

 

[Dopamine_Cowboy]

I'm basically with lasthurrah19 on the 12-step issue.

I like my methylbenzoylecgonine and diacetylmorphine and I believe it is possible to enjoy the pleasures they provide without becoming (or remaining) a full-blown addict.

The whole 12-step philosophy is too rigid and dogmatic in my opinion. It's either total abstinence or "disease"...there is no middle ground.

 

[New]

For some people, there is no middle ground.

Let me iterate another point I gleaned from someone who had done research into Alcoholics Anonymous:The Twelve Steps were designed as a last resort, not a first defense. The people who wrote the book WANTED to drink, but couldn't. When the Big Book mentions that there may be a cure one day, they weren't kidding. The original writers wanted to drink and had tried absolutely everything in their power. And these were White, middle-aged protestant businessman. They could get a good deal of shit. They could not. The Twelve steps are not for people who can "get over it", and even then there are other ways now. I'm presenting to you mine. Not the bullshit you hear in meetings, not the crazies who stare at you funny because they're old as hell and have got nothing better to do, and certainly not what treatment centers have distorted it into.

 

[AfterGlow]

Samael... you've got that exactly right. AA was started by 2 very low bottom drunks who had made an absolute mess of their lives, tried countless number of times and ways to curtail their drinking, and eventually came to the conclusion that they were unable to moderate or stop their drinking. For those unfortunates, abstinence is the only real solution. They discovered that by becoming honest with themselves, facing their alcoholism and past misdeeds, making amends and getting on with recovery, and supporting each other they had a much better chance of staying sober. Bill Wilson had a "spiritual experience" while suffering DT's, and that gave him the emotional and motivational strength to try and help other alcoholics. To some AA may seem like a cult, but when you're drinking gets so bad as to ruin your entire life, it takes extraordinary drastic measure to turn things around. Thanks to AA I no longer want to drink. And I understand the reasoning for the steps even though I do not believe in the God of the christian bible. But when you've lost all hope and your desire to live, you need to something to believe in. For many, god serves that purpose well. Once you achive long term sobriety, then you can rethink the whole god thing and what it really means to you.

 

[Jabberwocky]

The twelve steps were not a new innovation of alcoholics anonymous or Bill W. They are a reworking of the six tenets of the Oxford Group. I think this is pretty much admitted in AA comes of Age though it has been a long time since I've read that book and I've read so much other material since, I might be mistaken.

The Twelve Steps were designed as a last resort, not a first defense. The people who wrote the book WANTED to drink, but couldn't.

That is a good point but AA as practiced and utilized in my region doesn't get to use this qualification for much because AA and ancillary organizations are pushed on people who are not low bottoms. People with court cards to be signed at meetings can as easily be a 15 year old with one incident of minor in possession as someone who has lost it all. I do think AA could renounce the practice of court cards. Some may say that it is taking a position on an outside issue, therefore contrary to the traditions. AA doesn't follow its traditions anymore anyways. AA runs TV and other advertisements which is not "relying on attraction rather than promotion" In fact, I argue that by accepting the practice of people sentenced to meetings they are "relying on coercion rather than promotion"

The Big Book says several places that science may some day find a better way. When I mentioned medications (not in a meetings but in the social stuff after) I was told to shut up about that stuff as it could delude people into thinking they didn't need meetings and cost lives. I know the dozens of meetings I went to do not represent the whole of AA, but I don't think they are non-representative either.

 

[AfterGlow]

AA does not endorse court sentencing that mandates attendance of AA meetings. That is a matter between the court and the defendant. Each individual AA group decides for itself whether or not they are willing to sign court slips. Some groups do and some do not.

I do think AA could renounce the practice of court cards. Some may say that it is taking a position on an outside issue, therefore contrary to the traditions.

 

[New]

The twelve steps were not a new innovation of alcoholics anonymous or Bill W. They are a reworking of the six tenets of the Oxford Group. I think this is pretty much admitted in AA comes of Age though it has been a long time since I've read that book and I've read so much other material since, I might be mistaken.

That is a good point but AA as practiced and utilized in my region doesn't get to use this qualification for much because AA and ancillary organizations are pushed on people who are not low bottoms. People with court cards to be signed at meetings can as easily be a 15 year old with one incident of minor in possession as someone who has lost it all. I do think AA could renounce the practice of court cards. Some may say that it is taking a position on an outside issue, therefore contrary to the traditions. AA doesn't follow its traditions anymore anyways. AA runs TV and other advertisements which is not "relying on attraction rather than promotion" In fact, I argue that by accepting the practice of people sentenced to meetings they are "relying on coercion rather than promotion"



The Big Book says several places that science may some day find a better way. When I mentioned medications (not in a meetings but in the social stuff after) I was told to shut up about that stuff as it could delude people into thinking they didn't need meetings and cost lives. I know the dozens of meetings I went to do not represent the whole of AA, but I don't think they are non-representative either.

You do bring up some good points. It's just that, like all things meant to help, it's been distorted over time into something it wasn't supposed to represent. And yes, they are nothing new, but the six tenets helps Bill, and I'm guessing he wanted to do his own thing with them to make them more accessible.

And there's something I keep hearing from the people in my sober supports..."99 percent of what you hear in meetings is bullshit"

 

[Z Y G G Y]

I think that whatever can help someone stop using is great.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion of course but people who have already done the AA/NA steps shouldn't be so negative about them. It might turn new people off w/o even giving it a try. And who knows maybe it was AA/NA that helped u w/o u even realizing it. Maybe it helped u open up some doors to recovery and u don't feel it was AA/NA that did that. Since u did the program u can't say that it was totally useless if u see some improvement in your life now.

I've never done AA/NA but I feel that most people here that did it don't like it very much. Is it really that useless? Has anyone here ever recover with the help of the program? Does anyone here feel that the program has been a great tool for their recovery?

 

[lasthurrah19]

I've never seen any study that didn't show AA/NA has the same recovery rate as spontaneous remission - about 5% every year the end up quitting for a year or more. And that's the important thing. There's also happens to be some cultish things about it, especially since most people view The Oxford Group as a cult or at least a religion, so basically Bill W. stole the cult/religion model from TOG when he made AA, he changed some minor things about it and at first it was just for alcoholics (before Al-Anon and _A's...), whereas TOG was for everyone. His 'spiritual awakening' was while on a crapload of psychedelic drugs and suggestions (while he was on these drugs) that he have one by other members of TOG.

Bottom line, in my experience, I just felt like none of it made sense when I went in there, not because the people that go to AA/NA are bad people, but because the steps them selves seemed very religious to me, and open for a lot of very different interpretations, many of which are very drastic - but that's not in step one.. I did a tiny bit of looking around and stumbled on this site: www.orange-papers.org It is very well written, granted the writer can be a big shithead sometimes but many of his points seem very valid to me with a lot of proof with bibliographies etc. And it's a lot of material, days of reading if you went through the whole site.

By all means, if it seems to help you than go for it. I don't think it's necessarily doing people harm to go, and if it somehow gives someone strength to quit, great. It just doesn't make sense to me.

 

[New]

That's true. I have read all of that, from Michigan State's study, to the Orange Papers to Rational Recovery.

Yet there seems to be something that works for those 5%. Maybe, if instead of throwing out the baby with the bathwater, we try to find the psychological underpinnings of the Twelve Steps. I'm starting this series on that precept, not on any religious undertones and not on anything else people may have tried to shove down your throat. So just take a breath and read it from that perspective before you shove everything you hate about AA down my throat.

 

[lasthurrah19]

I'm sorry, personally I've actually lost people to the 12 steps, as in they follow it dogmatically and won't talk to me anymore because I don't. Although I do like your take on it, I realize I'm taking it a bit personally. Sorry again.

 

[New]

No worries.

Not all of us are like that. But more on that later.

 

[kzorro]

I'm sorry, personally I've actually lost people to the 12 steps, as in they follow it dogmatically and won't talk to me anymore because I don't. Although I do like your take on it, I realize I'm taking it a bit personally. Sorry again.

Do you still use/drink?

 

[lasthurrah19]

not usually

I did smoke a little pot not long ago (few weeks), and I am on suboxone.

But I'm not using.

 

[CokeMonger]

Are you taking Suboxone as maintenance or to detox? I've used it to detox before, doc is suggesting I go on maintenance.... love to hear from someone whose done it....

 

[lasthurrah19]

maintenance. It keeps withdrawals away and I don't use on it because it would be a waste. I've done just detoxing a few times but I can't keep my shit together for more than about 6weeks. Now I have around 12 weeks or so... not much I know, but it's a good fallback, if I take it like I should I really have no reason to use (other) opiates. Of course, I've tried before, lol

 

[mymindisgoo]

this is fun to read. i currently just started my 1st step about 5m inutes ago and figured there has to be something on this site. bottom line people have been using these steps, as written for over 40 years for NA, and 80 for AA. changing the wording to me makes me feel like 'you' are not truly admitting that there's a problem. this doesn't have to be a last resort. it's not for me, i didn't hit no where near a 'bottom' as other people have, but i want to stay clean and saying i wont use tomorrow simply does not cut it for me.

op, i don't know yur story. were yu drinking everyday, if you didn't drink would you start getting shakes and what not? sounds pretty powerless if the only way to relive yourself was to drink again.. i know this thread is kind of relatively old, but oh well. should bring it back!