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  • Trip Reports Moderator: Cheshire_Kat

(~100 µg LSD & 4 MDMA caps & weed) - Semi Exp - Candyflip experience - DESTROYED ME

too much frequent rolling, we have all been there.

avoid mdma and all stims for a good few months at least.

if you go on antidepressants they can be addictive and it sounds like mdma burnout, if it doesn't improve after a few weeks then maybe see a doctor (but try excercise and stopping eating rubbish food, get veg and fish and make proper meals), i just have experience with antidepressants not working well for me. i just became demotivated and accepting of everything.
 
Do you guys think it is work seeking help from a psychologist or psychiatrist, and maybe getting some medication to address some of the issues i am having, or is this something that i should try just beat on my own?

I recently have had a very damaging experience with MDMA and understand some of what you are going through and I am very sorry you had to go through this. After 3 months of little progress I decided to see a therapist for the same reasons, anxiety, depression, paranoia ect.. It has been beneficial so far. I think the main thing is having someone help you recognize some of the unrealistic negativity. I know I have been thinking negative but I was surprised to see how how that negativity distorts reality and that can be a little scary. So my experience with therapy has been beneficial but to be honest, I believe with time I would come to the same realizations and be able to recover fully on my own, a therapist just helps speed that process along significantly.

Another thing that would probably be very beneficial for you is mindfulness meditation. It's main benefits are all about getting a clearer picture of your reality, which means reducing the negativity and helping you feel more in control of your thoughts and grounded to reality. I had the same experience where I heard voices of people talking about me some, real, some not. It was very damaging to my perceptions of my self and created a ton of anxiety in social settings. Mindfulness really helped here as well.

I am drawing from my similar personal experience but I hope that this may help. I wish you luck in your recovery.
 
Why avoid caffeine?

By antagonizing Adenosine receptors caffeine indirectly increases Dopamine receptor activity. Also by doing so it increases norepinephrine and dopamine concentrations which is very counterproductive if you want to decrease your anxiety.
 
Funny you guys mention that caffeine isnt a good idea, i decided to have one this morning at work as i was feeling tired, i ended up feeling like complete shit for the rest of the day and ended up leaving work early after a long five or so hours of complete anxiety, i serious think i may have had a panic attack or anxiety attack, something similar happened the last time i got coffee from this particular place as well , it must be something about there coffee , whether its stronger or what because i have been having coffee every now and then and have been fine.

Have been in bed since i got home feeling extremely down/depressed and not feeling like going back to work tomorrow :/

edit: have calmed down alot now since i got home from work, feeling much better.
 
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I recently have had a very damaging experience with MDMA and understand some of what you are going through and I am very sorry you had to go through this. After 3 months of little progress I decided to see a therapist for the same reasons, anxiety, depression, paranoia ect.. It has been beneficial so far. I think the main thing is having someone help you recognize some of the unrealistic negativity. I know I have been thinking negative but I was surprised to see how how that negativity distorts reality and that can be a little scary. So my experience with therapy has been beneficial but to be honest, I believe with time I would come to the same realizations and be able to recover fully on my own, a therapist just helps speed that process along significantly.

Another thing that would probably be very beneficial for you is mindfulness meditation. It's main benefits are all about getting a clearer picture of your reality, which means reducing the negativity and helping you feel more in control of your thoughts and grounded to reality. I had the same experience where I heard voices of people talking about me some, real, some not. It was very damaging to my perceptions of my self and created a ton of anxiety in social settings. Mindfulness really helped here as well.

I am drawing from my similar personal experience but I hope that this may help. I wish you luck in your recovery.

Hey man, thanks for sharing, sounds like your going through something very similar to me.
Is it a psychologist your seeing? and also did you have someone to speak to before seeking help? i.e. friends & family

I feel that if it speeds the process significantly it may be a good idea for me, as it has already been months since my bad experience and i feel i have had little progress with everything, as now due to anxiety etc that i have developed i start feeling down after other events that have occur since the bad trip, making it hard for myself to feel better overall if that makes sense.
 
Hey, i didn't read all the messages but i will relate to the post youve been write. also please forgive me about my english.

I had really bad trip too about one year ago after i took too much acid in trance festival, in addition i was with people i didn't feel comfortably with (what known as a setting).
So i felt the most difficult and bad situation i've ever felt. In the days after the experience i felt like i've been changed but i kind of denied it to myself. after a period of some months i started to remember and to understand what i been through and what happend there. My condition just got more and more worst. i felt more or less the things that you say youre feeling (Anxiety, diffuculity to sit with freinds, can't smoke weed even that i used to smoke everyday and etc). I took a break from drugs (though i smoked a few times and i felt bad), and i took even a break from my friends cause i was not able to enjoy with them anymore and i felt like you said, that im acting weird and all this shit. I also thought that i just fucked up forever and i'll can't enjoy this life again. But then i started to take cipralex and doing exercise and trying to think more positive, it was and it still a long road but right now i feel alot better, i feel like "i back to myself" and the things starting to get better. Though the experience i had in the festival was undoubt my worst in my life, and it made me to get into a hard times, im still thinking that this experience teached me alot about myself and about the world so im always trying to think positive and to think that everything is for the best, even this experience.

My advices to you are to trying to take this negative experience to something good, the world is dynamic place, there is no really "normal" or "insane". Think positive. you can to be helped with SSRI pills. you also can do exerice it's really help, and you should take a break from drugs for a period until you get feel better. Also, even when you will do drugs - know to be a careful and to not overboard with those materials.

Wish you the best friend. Think positive and everything will be good. It's a wonderful world.
 
update: went out last night to go clubbing, had an ok time but throughout the night was anxious with my surroundings and felt uneasy, also had negative thoughts coming to mind. im starting to think ssri's may be a good option for me and that i should go talk to someone.
If i do go down this path does that mean i would have to ensure that im taking no drugs at all while on the medication? and will it have a significant effect in making myself feel better for when i go out.
 
SSRIs affect everyone differently. Some people are really helped by them, and some find it makes things worse. Also different ones might work for you and others not, and it seems like doctors sort of crapshoot and try you on different ones til you find one that works. I would recommend no other drugs if you're taking them, particularly since you're trying to get back to normal after taking drugs. I would recommend no drugs regardless until you feel better. Marijuana actually can make situations like this a lot worse, it's really not good for you if you're in an unbalanced place, it may not seem like it but it's true. You really need some sobriety man.
 
SSRIs affect everyone differently. Some people are really helped by them, and some find it makes things worse. Also different ones might work for you and others not, and it seems like doctors sort of crapshoot and try you on different ones til you find one that works. I would recommend no other drugs if you're taking them, particularly since you're trying to get back to normal after taking drugs. I would recommend no drugs regardless until you feel better. Marijuana actually can make situations like this a lot worse, it's really not good for you if you're in an unbalanced place, it may not seem like it but it's true. You really need some sobriety man.

Think ill wait out another month and if im not feeling better go see someone.
And yeah i used to be a daily smoker and im now completely off it man.
Have a big weekend coming up and have decided will just stick with the alcohol, its going to be tough when there will be coke/mdma around me but i feel its really time to have a break especially off the mdma and weed
 
Saw a doctor today and told her everything finally after 6 months, have been referred to a psychologist, hopefully it can only get better from here!
 
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