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“How you doing Rob?” (critique or none, don't care)

leiphos

Bluelighter
Joined
May 8, 2008
Messages
1,147
“Yo, take a look,” he says, “at this.” “Yeah.” “No dude, look real close
at a taking: look. Yeah? It’s yours—but soon.” “Ya,” I murmur. Money
switches sides. “Yours,” is his echo, “taken by you...by Mr...” (What is
in a...
) “Rob,” I claim. Mom claimed me as Dave as Dad watched. I lie

beb-bound now dreaming dismembered scenes now fixed on Daddy’s
white molecules, my atoms dozed-up totally. And not Rob. Not even
slipping nameless down his spine’s spiral staircase, scribbled stupored
some formula (ink white) peeling eyes—then unpeeling, un-warming

warmth...grins...un-cum-clogged sheets, un-8-beer-splotches, I press
2 thumbs into it, or me, & 1 mattress gives, guages my Daddy’s half-
mingle, his membranes giving, giving me, giving— Night... What it was

was it, was it not? Not the night evolving into night, that way dark has
of knowing the way to zero? Infinity in milliliters. Twisting a synapse
then listing towards some self. Me... Me? Down curtains; down Dave.
 
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