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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

ever blown a good opportunity with a nice girl/guy through too much drugs/alcohol??

Last night broken up with r lass of the last +year cause of my drug use mainly. Shes the nicest person you'l ever meet and im just not, not a bad person but an idiot sometimes.. so i ended it before i fuck up and hurt her or die on her. Damn she took me off living on autopilot and made me give a fuck again, made me think more again.. It fuckin hurts. I liked autopilot.
Kronos wants a nice fat shot of h or summat, but nah. il carry on moving house again and work all the hours god sends touch wood
 
Yup. Not like, around her, she was always accepting of my use. Id trust her with my life and she would me, but if i cant trust myself when out/pissed/one of them days couldnt do it to her. Or myself, not gonna pretend it was a selfless thing.
 
I fully sympathise. I've only had my heart broken once; though as every drunk worth his Tennents knows, that once is enough.

It's never quite the same after that, and you're watching your back, waiting for the knives. Which inevitably come, but take you by surprise even though you thought you were keeping an eye out. Fuckers.

Ahem. Anyway, my salvation was Lamb's Navy Rum, wearing Arab headgear and listening to West Indian pirate radio.

As with all things (especially of the amorous persuasion) YMMV.
 
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SamhainGrim said:
I fully sympathise. I've only had my heart broken once; though as every drunk worth his Tennents knows, that once is enough.

It's never quite the same after that, and you're watching you back, waiting for the knives. Which inevitably come, but take you by surprise even though you thought you were keeping an eye out. Fuckers.

Ahem. Anyway, my salvation was Lamb's Navy Rum, wearing Arab headgear and listening to West Indian pirate radio.

As with all things (especially of the amorous persuasion) YMMV.
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Ha empty bottle of that next to me. Along with several others, damn i need to stop drinking for sleep =D
Feels different when you're the one with the knife though, which only crosses your mind when you've had a few too many but you keep it hidden and be good. Knowing you're the cunt thatd fuck it up one day, not her. She knew it too but stuck with me anyway cause she loved me too much, so i had to bail cause i couldnt hurt her and i know one day i might.

Fuckin drugs, the highest highs and the lowest lows
 
Lamb's. Classic break-up drink. Makes a broken-hearted wretch feel like the King of the High Seas.

The drink of freshly-deposed champions.
 
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all i need is the parrot. Anyone wanna swap a parrot for half a leg?
 
it sounds like youv'e done a very noble and considerate thing. difficult decision to make, and much respect to you, is there any chance you'll be able to sort it out if you get to a position where you don't think drugs are gonna mess things up for the both of you?
 
Yes.

Back when I was at uni and still trying to be mostly male, I managed to score several tabs of LSD. So one night I was in the student bar, tripping as you do, and for some reason thought it would be a good idea to tell this girl that I fancied that I'd taken a couple of tabs of acid.

"Have you started having hallucinations yet?" she inquired, apparently genuinely interested.

Now, what I wanted to say was: "I'm not exactly seeing things that aren't there, that's not really how it works. I am seeing things that are there, just a bit differently. Everything looks a little bit more beautiful than usual tonight ..... including you".

Now, that probably wouldn't actually have been a bad line. Certainly not the usual mais en sauce de fromage as they say in Paris. Only that wasn't how it came out.

What I actually said was: "Yes, I've hallucinated that you're pretty!"
 
Lol, still would have been a bad line, you look more beautiful than usual! But not as bad! :)
 
I lost the love of my life, my true soul mate. What an amazing woman she is. I see her in every girl I look at... in my mind, no other woman can even compare to her.

We broke up just over 2 months ago basically because I continually spent the majority of my salary on gear. We lived together and I always paid my share of the bills. She is a doctor and works long days/weekends/nights/etc so we didn't get a whole lot of time together anyway but when we did I had no money as I'd spent it all on gear. She was incredible to stick with me and give me over a year to try and quit but I think after a year of living together with me having a H habit and never having money (I always bought presents for all occasions but going out for dinner wasn't my priority).
She gave me such a long time to quit and I tried (on my own, with no help at all) but I kept relapsing. Now that I have lost her, I have entered treatment and am on my way to sorting myself out but I am still some time away from getting totally clean.

On the positive side, we stick talk a few times a week (opposed to multiple times a day when we were together and apart from a few days for whatever reason, i.e. I was working away from home). We still see each other every month, as much as possible with her bizarre work schedule. Normally about twice. The difference is I now have cash to spend so I can treat her to dinner, cinema, drinks, etc, etc.
I am trying hard to show her that I am winning the battle against my addiction. She has told me she still loves me and cares for me but "it isn't enough anymore" (whatever that means).
Hopefully, with time... the pain I caused her by ruining her trust through constant lies (about my addiction/recovery) and all the other problems that come with living with an addict (apart from stealing, which I haven't done). Anyway, enough time will hopefully heal that pain and providing I keep in contact and keep showing her that I am improving and every day I win the war against my addiction just that little bit more then maybe in 6months or so, I can convince her to let me in a bit and let me start over and try to win her affection back too!

Due to an awful decision to use H a good few years ago, I ended up making a decision of favouring my habit over my wonderful girlfriend. Sure it wasn't me that made the decision... it was the H and what they did to my mind but at the end of the day it is my fault. I know that and I just need to show her that I have ended that entire part of my life and it will never come back.

I love her so much and if I could go back and have another chance... I would fight the H habit with every ounce of strength in me.
Sorry to ramble so much... hopefully someone will read this and they may be in a similar position to the one I was in and they will realise how much that person means to them and how much damage those lies (that seem simple and harmless to you as an addict) can actually do.

On another positive side, losing her was one of the final pieces of wood holding me up from hitting rock bottom and once I lost her, everything else went too and I really hit rock bottom and finally entered a real treatment program which I am currently going through. I visit a private addiction clinic every fortnight and have so much believe in their methods and myself that I truly believe it will work out!
 
This is one of the best threads I have read on here..Its very funny...and also a little bit sad...
Personally I was meeting up with a girl/woman I had been with a couple of times and after gettin back to her place with her mate I double dropped pills and her friend came onto me.Her friend was evil told me that she had asked her friend,who was also off her head, and she had said ya its ck .So I went into a bedroom with her and proceeded to go down on her and the friend came into the bedroom turned on the lights and said what the fuck are you doing ? and started crying.Then they kicked me out.Cringe city.It was a real low point I copped on after that to some degree. Comedy = tragedy + time
 
chinup said:
it sounds like youv'e done a very noble and considerate thing. difficult decision to make, and much respect to you, is there any chance you'll be able to sort it out if you get to a position where you don't think drugs are gonna mess things up for the both of you?
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Haha doesnt feel like it, basically just protected myself by hurting us both less sooner. You've met her havnt ya? Its gonna be hard but we'll stay friends, i know it. Even after i ended it we finished off the rum & watched a film and slept & talked. Saying bye in the morning was the bit that did my head in cause now it'l take a fucking long time before itl be okay with us.

Doubt it, drugs have been a big part of my life, basically my life for too long & its drinking where i cant really trust myself.

On that note, when did they stop doing them £8 bottles of james cooks rum at lidl :( had to buy some vodka instead

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arrrrrr the parrots forsaken me
 
This thread has gonna from amusing stories of being too fucked to fuck! Yeah i know! :) to heartbreaking stories of love lost! I don't like to think of the latter but may post my sorry sob story I a bit if I'm not too fucked
 
So, how long till the urge to go and buy a bag of whatever opis i can find or to get hammered and start a fight with the first group of rowdy cunts i can find goes away?
 
joe90 said:
I wish you the best in sorting yourself out Jay. It sounds like you are ready to change.
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Much appreciated mate. I am ready to change but I know how much I need that opiate crutch.

I have been in treatment for nearly 3 months now and have basically just been maintaining my addiction using morphine. However, at least it has given me stability and keeps me away from the streets. I am going into work properly... not being late, pulling sickies, etc, etc.
The doctor's who treat me are very good... they don't push for you to reduce and let you come to your own decision on that. I have fortnightly appointments and last week, I made the decision to reduce my dosage! They were happy as I had decided it on my own without them mentioning it. It's a long and expensive process but they're success rate is GREAT! I have a lot of confidence in them and (at an additional cost, it's all private but this is on top of the clinic fees) I am seeing they're psychologist out of hours. That is great, helping me deal with all issues... especially the root problem that created many other problems (to keep it short and sweet... when I was 12, I was on holiday with my parents and I got raped by an 18 year old lad on multiple occasions and it really really fucked me up. I had never told ANYONE until fairly recently as I was soooo ashamed of myself but I now realise that I shouldn't be ashamed... it wasn't my fault and I was helpless to stop it!!!)

Anyway... I'm on the up and up!
 
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