Emjay- why won't your Psychiatrist let you try diazepam?
I'm not really too sure. When I asked if there were any other options, she said something like, "I don't prescribe Xanax if that's what you're thinking. The dependence and withdrawals are severe."
Then I asked about diazepam, and I think she said something along those lines as well. She told me she only feels comfortable prescribing clonazepam and lorazepam to outpatients (despite the fact that she's asked me to admit myself on numerous occasions), and even then that's only in the worst cases. I get really anxious talking to her (or anybody) about my problems though, and my mind kind of goes into a reactionary mode with little room for thought, so it's actually difficult for me to recall exactly what she said.
I don't know if that's a huge deal though, I seem to be handling it better, oddly enough, when I take higher doses rather than just the 0.5. Right now she's okayed 1.5mg as needed, rather than a consistent dose of 0.5mg twice daily, but I think I'm going to ask to bump it to 2mg if only for the reason that the prescription will be significantly cheaper for me to fill.
If it's any indication, I was ridiculously anxious with her, as I mentioned, after I had just taken 1.5mg. So it's definitely not the end of my problems, but I was able to negotiate at a car dealership over the weekend without having a panic attack, which is something I don't think I could have done without it. So it's a help, but right now I feel like I no longer have control over my progress, I just don't know what exactly I can do myself to better my situation.
As for valium's active metabolites, oxazepam and temazepam are correct, but the main one is nordiazepam.