Mental Health Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v. 9

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we will recover folks have faith. I'm just starting to eat well but its impossible to go for walks in this freezing weather. No money for gym no money for anything but I still have faith God will heal me Inshallah.
 
This is like the worst drug to exist. They shouldn't be able to do this to people day in day out same shit. I feel nothing, nothing is fun nothing is exciting nothing is anything I am emotionally fucked i can't sleep well i toss and I turn i wake up and feel that shitty fucking feeling. It's not getting any better. Oh well just venting. If u don't post here once a week you may consider me dead.
You are going to come out of this. At least give it a year. You just got your shots three months ago, you're not even close to recovering yet. Please hang in there, there have been enough suicides linked to these threads.
 
I wrapped up all of my pipes and my bong bowl and put them in a box wrapped with tape. I only have a one hitter pipe for panic attacks and pain I can't manage. I'm either quitting weed or drastically cutting back because it's harming my PSSD recovery. I know I'm in the home stretch.

I get fission from touching my arm, stomach and thigh with a certain pressure. More frequent frisson from art of all kinds. I cry readily most of the time.

I think my hormones might be okay now? Still imbalanced but not out of range anymore.

Still haven't started my TB treatment, I'm scared. The antibiotic is rough on the body and PSSD havers often crash from antibiotics, but I can't find anything about the one I'm supposed to take other than a guy who was unexpectedly helped by it. I'm going in for a final precautionary blood test for vitamin deficiencies and a diabetes check on Friday or next Monday. Then I guess I'll bite the bullet.
 
It pisses me off when people say,

walking outside might help
Have more positive mindset
Waking up early will help
it is because you are being lazy
You lose muscle because you don't work out

It is like they try to give me advice when I am on fire.

When you are on this fucking toxin, something isn't possible.
They don't get it.

When you are injected with snake venom, would you say "walking outside might help?"
Do you think it is easy to "Have positive mindset"

People are fucking dumb.
I just sent a screenshot of this to my father. I'm living with him and can't quite get my point across how nothing will help how I feel inside.
 
Anyone does know where to order poison that bojana took? I think im gonna do it. The trauma and the evil narcissistic family abusing me and me cannot reacting with anger made me sucidal so much. Where do i buy it
 
has anyone here ever heard/seen a recovery story within four months? i know invega has a long half-life but i feel okay. i only got one shot back in october. maybe i'm just getting used to it. seems surreal.
Glad to hear your feeling better.
 
Anyone does know where to order poison that bojana took? I think im gonna do it. The trauma and the evil narcissistic family abusing me and me cannot reacting with anger made me sucidal so much. Where do i buy it
Dying solves nothing.

Let's hear about your trauma and your evil narcissistic family?

What makes you think that way and what trauma do you have?
 
Dying solves nothing.

Let's hear about your trauma and your evil narcissistic family?

What makes you think that way and what trauma do you have?
They know schizophrenia diagnosis is fake and all i had is anxiety disorder/cptsd yet for minor not life threatening verbal fights i been hospitalized and force injected despite not being psychotic. It happened 3 times. Now when i control myself and keep myself as distanced as possible they threaten me with court and showed me date of it happening with judge name in it. The case about force hospitalizing me despite me not being schizophrenic or a danger to no one or myself. I can defend myself in court tho cause i have recordings of them being agressive to me, the case was intented to happen 7 days ago so they either delayed it or deleted. There is also infantilisation, emasculating me and not letting me become an adult grown up man at 26 yo, putting me down. They are evil. 😭 Injections are the worst thing that ever happened to me that left me suicidal and they threaten me despite that. Trully evil
 
They know schizophrenia diagnosis is fake and all i had is anxiety disorder/cptsd yet for minor not life threatening verbal fights i been hospitalized and force injected despite not being psychotic. It happened 3 times. Now when i control myself and keep myself as distanced as possible they threaten me with court and showed me date of it happening with judge name in it. The case about force hospitalizing me despite me not being schizophrenic or a danger to no one or myself. I can defend myself in court tho cause i have recordings of them being agressive to me, the case was intented to happen 7 days ago so they either delayed it or deleted. There is also infantilisation, emasculating me and not letting me become an adult grown up man at 26 yo, putting me down. They are evil. 😭 Injections are the worst thing that ever happened to me that left me suicidal and they threaten me despite that. Trully evil
You said just "verbal" fights but you are hospitalized for 3 times?

I think it feels like you are trying to minimize the incidents or your family is really abusive.

I don't trust "doctors" either but usually family doesn't try to hospitalize one of the family member.

You will have to tell us what exactly happened and how your family is interpreting this situation to understand this situation better.

I don't really expect anyone to truly understand our situation because there are so few people with mental capability to do such thing.

You said not being schizophrenic or a danger but what really happened? If you can't tell in public DM me in private.
 
You said just "verbal" fights but you are hospitalized for 3 times?

I think it feels like you are trying to minimize the incidents or your family is really abusive.

I don't trust "doctors" either but usually family doesn't try to hospitalize one of the family member.

You will have to tell us what exactly happened and how your family is interpreting this situation to understand this situation better.

I don't really expect anyone to truly understand our situation because there are so few people with mental capability to do such thing.

You said not being schizophrenic or a danger but what really happened? If you can't tell in public DM me in private.
Haha exactly brother. You hit the spot. My family is evil narcissistic and i was calling how fake they are and how much mental and psychical violence were at home and my mother didnt liked it so i was hospitalized. What really happened was that i had strong cptsd symptoms my nervous system was so damaged which didnt allowed me to work or go to college after finishing high school so my mother instead of taking it seriously was treating me with contempt (because it is weak supposedly) as she is a narc and not a real mother so i was losing my shit and when whole family came on dinner including sisters and brothers in law i went out from my room started calling her a whore a bitch and a psycho narcissistic peace of shit then i broke glass in my door with my fist.... They called cops and it was my first hospitalization and i got anxiety disorder diagnosis which was correct as its connected to cptsd i have. I went back home amazing because the psychiatrist was an older woman who validated me and soothed like a real mother would (i never received such love from no one) which gave me huge healing experience i could work on with later. So 2 years later after that my mother saw me feeling better and happy and she knew im about to expose the whole story of what happened with me and this family to relatives and i was being constantly provoked called names that i look like shit. She was waking me up randomly and telling me im going to the hospital. She was a psycho i started losing my shit again and was hospitalized this time just for verbal fight (which was against the law cause i wasnt a danger) and some psycho bitch from hospital took it all as paranoid schizophrenia. I spit out all the pills went back home and 9 months later my mother cut the internet connection where i had contact with my friend who was my only source of empathy and compassion so lost my shiit again because why you do that to your own son if im broken by previous hospital and was hospitalized for destroying the bathroom doors (which is also against the law because i wasnt a danger to nobody) and this time this disgusting piece of shit psychiatrist from tworki hospital anna opawska gave me injections because she knew i was spitting out all the pills. I got out 6 months passed my mother was treating me like shit again mind games all that i slapped her in face and got another 2 abilify ones. Im so suicidal i think imma do it. Sorry if its too long thanks for asking 😭🧡💚
 
Haha exactly brother. You hit the spot. My family is evil narcissistic and i was calling how fake they are and how much mental and psychical violence were at home and my mother didnt liked it so i was hospitalized. What really happened was that i had strong cptsd symptoms my nervous system was so damaged which didnt allowed me to work or go to college after finishing high school so my mother instead of taking it seriously was treating me with contempt (because it is weak supposedly) as she is a narc and not a real mother so i was losing my shit and when whole family came on dinner including sisters and brothers in law i went out from my room started calling her a whore a bitch and a psycho narcissistic peace of shit then i broke glass in my door with my fist.... They called cops and it was my first hospitalization and i got anxiety disorder diagnosis which was correct as its connected to cptsd i have. I went back home amazing because the psychiatrist was an older woman who validated me and soothed like a real mother would (i never received such love from no one) which gave me huge healing experience i could work on with later. So 2 years later after that my mother saw me feeling better and happy and she knew im about to expose the whole story of what happened with me and this family to relatives and i was being constantly provoked called names that i look like shit. She was waking me up randomly and telling me im going to the hospital. She was a psycho i started losing my shit again and was hospitalized this time just for verbal fight (which was against the law cause i wasnt a danger) and some psycho bitch from hospital took it all as paranoid schizophrenia. I spit out all the pills went back home and 9 months later my mother cut the internet connection where i had contact with my friend who was my only source of empathy and compassion so lost my shiit again because why you do that to your own son if im broken by previous hospital and was hospitalized for destroying the bathroom doors (which is also against the law because i wasnt a danger to nobody) and this time this disgusting piece of shit psychiatrist from tworki hospital anna opawska gave me injections because she knew i was spitting out all the pills. I got out 6 months passed my mother was treating me like shit again mind games all that i slapped her in face and got another 2 abilify ones. Im so suicidal i think imma do it. Sorry if its too long thanks for asking 😭🧡💚
So there actually was violence and breaking stuffs which are concerning for sure from family's perspective.

How did your mother actually treated you in bad way?

I don't really see how exactly your mother treated you like shit.

You mentioned "mind games", "treating me like shit", "constantly provoked"

but how did she actually do it? what made you angry and break window and door and slap her?

What triggers you most?
 
So there actually was violence and breaking stuffs which are concerning for sure from family's perspective.

How did your mother actually treated you in bad way?

I don't really see how exactly your mother treated you like shit.

You mentioned "mind games", "treating me like shit", "constantly provoked"

but how did she actually do it? what made you angry and break window and door and slap her?

What triggers you most?
She emasculates me, castrates my sexuality, is dominant controling and as i said she was treating me with contempt at the worst moments of my life. She is evil bitch so i expressed anger and was hospitalized for it
 
She emasculates me, castrates my sexuality, is dominant controling and as i said she was treating me with contempt at the worst moments of my life. She is evil bitch so i expressed anger and was hospitalized for it
How does one get there sexuality castrated by there mother? Careful you might get an invega injection then you really will be in hell.
 
How does one get there sexuality castrated by there mother? Careful you might get an invega injection then you really will be in hell.
Lol there is Carl Jung the biggest genius of psychiatry in history and his female student who became a well known psychologist marie louise von franz said that mothers who castrate their sons are real. She legit does not want me to be married so i can be her husband-son. Disgusting.
 
Lol there is Carl Jung the biggest genius of psychiatry in history and his female student who became a well known psychologist marie louise von franz said that mothers who castrate their sons are real. She legit does not want me to be married so i can be her husband-son. Disgusting.
How's your dating life?
 
Lol there is Carl Jung the biggest genius of psychiatry in history and his female student who became a well known psychologist marie louise von franz said that mothers who castrate their sons are real. She legit does not want me to be married so i can be her husband-son. Disgusting.
If you had an invega injection you would already be castrated. Wouldn't need your mum to do anything.
 
She emasculates me, castrates my sexuality, is dominant controling and as i said she was treating me with contempt at the worst moments of my life. She is evil bitch so i expressed anger and was hospitalized for it
What's your sexuality?
 
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