Mental Health Coming off Invega (paliperidone) injections, v 5.0

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nina guarirà. speriamo che i cugini non siano cattivi. questi cristiani bigotti di merda. Ragazzi. ho più di 1 anno Uso troppi stilnox (ambien) e sono molto depresso per lo xeolion. Mi sembrava di stare meglio ma oggi mi sento come se mi avessero appena fatto l'iniezione... pensi che la guarigione di una persona che non ha psicosi sia più lenta? uno psichiatra in un video dice che i dati su un soggetto non psicotico possono innescare meccanismi irreversibili
 
I haven't lived like I used to for 1 year. I only go to the sea to swim if I'm fine. but I would never be able to study driving license. do you think there is the possibility of not recovering? be honest. thanks to the watsup friends of the group I created. my virtual friends are the only ones left. thanks for the comoagnia. Petra, mickol, Nina, Giovanni, Paolo and others but I didn't list the names. I'm sorry I didn't meet you on bluelight because I don't speak English. I often show myself grumpy but I'm so afraid
 
Penso che ci sia assolutamente speranza nel riprendersi, come tanti hanno fatto prima di te!
tanti o tutti? Ho già avuto una piccola depressione da dopamina. il cervello di qualcuno con psicosi può essere diverso. se dato a qualcuno che non è psicotico ma depresso, allora è un disastro
 
I forgot to mention you have to buy empty capsules for powdered NAC. it tastes terrible like salt.

NAC removes invega from the body probably better than Saint John's wort. But Saint John's wort has other benefits like an MAOI which NAC doesn't have. Take both NAC and Saint John's Wort.. NAC is a super (pseudo)vitamin. Amazon sells packs of 1000 empty capsules for under 10 dollars so you can fill up the capsules with NAC and Glutathione.


N-acetylcysteine (NAC) is a supplement that has been available for several decades. People take it for various reasons, including to help treat medical issues ranging from psychological disorders to chronic lung conditions and to improve athletic performance.
 
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Ho dimenticato di menzionare che devi acquistare capsule vuote per NAC in polvere. ha un sapore terribile come il sale.

NAC rimuove l'invega dal corpo probabilmente meglio dell'erba di San Giovanni. Ma l'erba di San Giovanni ha altri vantaggi come un MAO che NAC non ha. Ma la NAC è una super vitamina . Amazon vende confezioni da 1000 capsule vuote a meno di 10 dollari.


La N-acetilcisteina (NAC) è un integratore disponibile da diversi decenni. Le persone lo prendono per vari motivi, incluso per aiutare a trattare problemi medici che vanno dai disturbi psicologici alle condizioni polmonari croniche e per migliorare le prestazioni atletiche.
Yes i know nac. Glutatione stimolation
 
Yes i know nac. Glutatione stimolation
Do you buy empty capsules for it? It hurts my teeth to drink it and tastes terrible. But it's to expensive in capsule form, when for cheaper, you can fill capsules yourself and buy bulk powder.
 
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Pro tip:Buy empty capsules and go shopping for bulk powdered nootropics

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Suggerimento per professionisti: acquista capsule vuote e fai shopping per nootropi in polvere sfusi

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L'ho preso in polvere. ma xeplion è effettuato dai reni non dal fegato. niente è stato usato usato 6 mesi. dopo 1 anno non mi sono ripreso. non c'è bisogno di bere o pisciare. Penso che il farmaco scompaia dopo un po', ma crea danni al cervello
 
I write here because I am very lonely and have all family against me and no friends. It is another day without sleeping I might die from a hear attack or a seizure. I look everywhere if I can find a doctor that talks about invenga and not sleeping at all but since 7 months I have been checking with no success. One who answer me wrote me after 4 months saying that he guessed I was sleeping better then. I might be a very rare case. I don't evolve at all. Nobody can help me. It is so unfair. Why don't I sleep? I think it is the depletion of dopamine. When does this end? I was sleeping so well before. Here people had the help of their family and/or can sleep. Some can even do things or even work. Why not me? I have no support and days are long and there is nothing I can do because of anhedonia

I think that those who have schizophrenia have better outcomes. I just had one episode of psychosis. They should have never gave it to me. And I should have stopped asap

I had a one off psychosis also. I had never even been on medication before I was against it. I had anxiety & ocd but I was highly functioning. I was fine on the first 2 loading doses even though I thought that was bad at the time because almost instantly it made my face twice the usual size & my hair was horrible straight away I had anhedonia but I would still wake up early like 7am & could still exercise & feel good enough even though not the same I had enough motivation I could watch tv & listen to music well enough I could also feel some effects of coffee & satisfaction from food, hunger, I could feel tiredness, I had enough energy & motivation to shower every day. But the first proper injection of 75mg ruined me I still can't believe how much it ruined me. It was my last shot & I'd give anything to even feel like I did on the first 2 loading doses. I feel like it has done more damage than it would for someone with schizophrenia because I only had psychosis for the first time & they even said they thought it was a one off occasion so why are they ruining my brain with such strong brain chemical altering substance
 
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Antipsychotic made me so ugly….I dunno if it’s the weight gain in the face or what they did to my eyes and my gender expression but I have to say life like this fucking sucks
Same here it's completely ruined my appearance I'm unrecognizable. It's ruined my face made it twice the size it was ruined my hair & I've put on 25kg. I used to be a very attractive person I used to have a great body & take care in my appearance I used to be confident in how I looked. This is like an actual nightmare it's bad enough it ruined me mentally but that hardest part is dealing with the physical damage it's done & not knowing when I'm going to look like myself again or when I'm going to stop putting on the weight
 
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It’s true my face isn’t symmetrical anymore and it messes up my eyes big time and ruined my pout I used to have. It deformed my mouth shape and my eyes. My before and after a are screwed!!!
Same here my lips look so small & thin now because my face is so fat I lost the definition in my bone structure & my nice defined jaw line
 
I’ve been off the injections for 260 days or close to 9 months now. I had 3 injections (2x234, 1x156). Around 8 months off I started to feel a bit better. I had a constant weird fuzzy feeling in my head which went away thankfully, now my head seems more clear. Also I had a totally hollow feeling in my chest, but now it feels more normal, like I have a semblance of emotion/conscience. I am also showing more emotion outwardly, smiling sometimes.

I feel like I’m at a similar place to @lau_rahxo and @EsseWasGreat. I’m only just feeling the slightest of emotions, they lack any depth to them and I don’t feel connected to them like I used to. Sometimes I realize how I should be feeling or how I used to feel, but the actual emotion is absent. When I listen to music I can feel a slight connection but nowhere near what it was before — my emotions used to go up and down according to the highs and lows of the song. Same with TV.

I am staying with a friend prepping for job interviews right now, which involves practicing some coding exercises. This is much more than what I was capable of just a couple of months ago - I was lying down all day doing nothing. But I still do it for the sake of getting a job and because my friends and family are pushing me. I derive no pleasure out of them and I’m never in the zone while doing them like I used to be. That makes it much harder and some days I just give up and lie in bed or surf the web.

I still cannot get natural erections and have no arousal or sex drive. I can get them manually but they’re weak and I don’t really feel anything emotionally. Hoping this improves too as I had a high drive before.

Overall I think I’m just seeing the light through the cracks. In some ways it feels more difficult than before since earlier I was just on autopilot and going with it. Now that I’m more conscious about what I’m missing I sometimes really regret the bad decisions that led to this a lot. Sometimes the emptiness is just staring at me and I feel hopeless. I try to look for positive stories and that gives me hope. I’m hoping I’ll be much more functional in the coming months. I don’t have much time before I’ll have to settle into a job and I’m afraid whether I’ll be able to put in the hours.

Have you thought about getting a work from home job? In Australia there's lots of work from home jobs now with covid. I'm doing telefundraising from home & I'm honestly surprised how well I've done. I got my job at almost 4 months off invega. I hadn't expected to be able to work so soon. I knew there was no way I could work unless it was work from home but even doing that I wasn't sure if I'd be able to do as well as I have. I still suffer from anxiety some days because it's technically sales even though it's for charity. They listen to our calls & we're expected to make a certain amount of sales/sign ups. But I've been moved to upgrades now where I call people who are already signed up for more money it's still nerve wracking some days because we get moved to so many different charities so have to learn a new script & I have to make sure my tone is right & some people can be rude or throw you off. You also have to deal with sensitive topics & people's personal stories relating to the charities sometimes & I worry I'll say the wrong thing or not say it in the right tone.
I love my job though it gives me routine, it makes the days go quicker & I'm earning money. I definitely recommend trying for a work from home job if you can or even a hybrid job where you work partly from home. Anyway, good luck with the job hunting
 
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So a few weeks ago I would've said I'm about 40% recovered but now I'd say I'm 50% recovered I've noticed a tiny bit of improvement listening to music & maybe a tiny bit of improvement watching tv. My biggest concern now in recovery is my physical appearance if I was looking like how I did before invega I'd be loving life I'd even say then I'd consider myself 60-70% recovered all I'd need then is more energy/motivation & to feel things more but I'd be happy with dealing with the anhedonia for however long I have to if I physically looked like myself again. I'd be doing so much more like going to the shops again, hanging out with friends, going for walks & doing things I'd usually do.
I actually stopped weighing myself for about a week because I was just fed up with putting on weight still. I weighed myself again & was surprised because I expected my weight to have gone up more but it was still at 75.4kg. I felt so much hope & it made me realise I'm maybe a bit more recovered mentally & if only my weight would stabilize & I could start losing weight I'd feel so much more positive/motivated & close to recovered. But then I weighed myself the next day & it was 76.7 I was devestated but the scales are electric & sometimes they show a higher weight but then I wait for them to clear & weigh myself again & it's usually a lower weight so I weighed myself again & it was 74.9kg which was lower than the 75.4kg the day before. Every day since I've been weighing myself & it's higher then lower 76.9 then 75.2, 77.7 then 75.5 then the last two days both days it's been 76.6 then 74.9.
I actually can't figure out how or why I could still be putting on so much weight it's about 1-1.5kg a week. I eat very healthily I drink lots of water, fresh orange juice for vitamin c, take vitamins & spirulina although I need to remember to take them more regularly. I was trying to exercise but gave up but I went on exercise bike yesterday I only burned 200 calories but it's better than nothing.
I'm 7 months off in 3 days. I feel like I'll never stop putting on weight I'm so scared to hit 80kg. I just need it to stop! I read so many comments where people have said they lost weight around the 6 month mark I had been so patient thinking I would be able to lose weight by now
 
So a few weeks ago I would've said I'm about 40% recovered but now I'd say I'm 50% recovered I've noticed a tiny bit of improvement listening to music & maybe a tiny bit of improvement watching tv. My biggest concern now in recovery is my physical appearance if I was looking like how I did before invega I'd be loving life I'd even say then I'd consider myself 60-70% recovered all I'd need then is more energy/motivation & to feel things more but I'd be happy with dealing with the anhedonia for however long I have to if I physically looked like myself again. I'd be doing so much more like going to the shops again, hanging out with friends, going for walks & doing things I'd usually do.
I actually stopped weighing myself for about a week because I was just fed up with putting on weight still. I weighed myself again & was surprised because I expected my weight to have gone up more but it was still at 75.4kg. I felt so much hope & it made me realise I'm maybe a bit more recovered mentally & if only my weight would stabilize & I could start losing weight I'd feel so much more positive/motivated & close to recovered. But then I weighed myself the next day & it was 76.7 I was devestated but the scales are electric & sometimes they show a higher weight but then I wait for them to clear & weigh myself again & it's usually a lower weight so I weighed myself again & it was 74.9kg which was lower than the 75.4kg the day before. Every day since I've been weighing myself & it's higher then lower 76.9 then 75.2, 77.7 then 75.5 then the last two days both days it's been 76.6 then 74.9.
I actually can't figure out how or why I could still be putting on so much weight it's about 1-1.5kg a week. I eat very healthily I drink lots of water, fresh orange juice for vitamin c, take vitamins & spirulina although I need to remember to take them more regularly. I was trying to exercise but gave up but I went on exercise bike yesterday I only burned 200 calories but it's better than nothing.
I'm 7 months off in 3 days. I feel like I'll never stop putting on weight I'm so scared to hit 80kg. I just need it to stop! I read so many comments where people have said they lost weight around the 6 month mark I had been so patient thinking I would be able to lose weight by now
how is your sleep?
 
how is your sleep?

It's hard to explain. I don't feel tiredness or exhaustion I just constantly feel like I have no energy. I can't take naps either except on very rare occasions like yesterday where I feel asleep around 2pm for maybe an hour while watching tv & woke up feeling horrible with no energy.
I used to go to bed around 10:30pm but now it's more like 11:30-midnight. I usually sleep for almost 8 hours I set my alarm for 7:45am then go back to sleep or lay in bed then my alarm goes off again at 8 I rarely get up at 8 I have either gone back to sleep or am laying in bed until around 8:15am or 8:30am.
I feel like crap when I wake up I have no energy & feel like I could go back lay back down it takes a few moments to be able to get up then I feel like I have no energy dragging myself around but I somehow do it every morning. I wake up feeling achy & tense I don't ever wake up feeling refreshed or like I've had a restful sleep like I used to before invega. I still have quite have vivid dreams like I used to. I wake up throughout the night but go back to sleep fairly easily
 
So a few weeks ago I would've said I'm about 40% recovered but now I'd say I'm 50% recovered I've noticed a tiny bit of improvement listening to music & maybe a tiny bit of improvement watching tv. My biggest concern now in recovery is my physical appearance if I was looking like how I did before invega I'd be loving life I'd even say then I'd consider myself 60-70% recovered all I'd need then is more energy/motivation & to feel things more but I'd be happy with dealing with the anhedonia for however long I have to if I physically looked like myself again. I'd be doing so much more like going to the shops again, hanging out with friends, going for walks & doing things I'd usually do.
I actually stopped weighing myself for about a week because I was just fed up with putting on weight still. I weighed myself again & was surprised because I expected my weight to have gone up more but it was still at 75.4kg. I felt so much hope & it made me realise I'm maybe a bit more recovered mentally & if only my weight would stabilize & I could start losing weight I'd feel so much more positive/motivated & close to recovered. But then I weighed myself the next day & it was 76.7 I was devestated but the scales are electric & sometimes they show a higher weight but then I wait for them to clear & weigh myself again & it's usually a lower weight so I weighed myself again & it was 74.9kg which was lower than the 75.4kg the day before. Every day since I've been weighing myself & it's higher then lower 76.9 then 75.2, 77.7 then 75.5 then the last two days both days it's been 76.6 then 74.9.
I actually can't figure out how or why I could still be putting on so much weight it's about 1-1.5kg a week. I eat very healthily I drink lots of water, fresh orange juice for vitamin c, take vitamins & spirulina although I need to remember to take them more regularly. I was trying to exercise but gave up but I went on exercise bike yesterday I only burned 200 calories but it's better than nothing.
I'm 7 months off in 3 days. I feel like I'll never stop putting on weight I'm so scared to hit 80kg. I just need it to stop! I read so many comments where people have said they lost weight around the 6 month mark I had been so patient thinking I would be able to lose weight by now

Also I forgot to mention I felt a bit more connected to my body the other day. It was the last day of my second period I've gotten off invega & usually when I used to get my period before invega on the last day of my period I would get this tension all through my body like I needed to release it I would stretch my body out or exercise to release the tension I believe it was my hormones adjusting. Well the other day when I was sitting at my computer desk while working I could feel those sensations again & it felt quite alright. I was stretching & even holding my body in better posture & feeling the release of the tension as I stretched & massaged my shoulders. Even stretching my arms out & twisting my body to stretch it out felt good. For the few weeks before that too before I got my period I had been feeling this kind of tension like I needed a massage for release & lymphatic drainage so I booked in & treated myself to a massage. I originally booked a lymphatic drainage massage but all she literally did was gently run her fingers over my body so I asked if she could do a remedial massage aswell so I could really get rid of the tension. I got my period again 5 days later after almost 3 months of waiting to get it again. I definitely think the massage brought it on. I want to get massages every month now.
I also want to start making sure to get as much sunshine as possible. I didn't realise but it's actually been a long time since I got sunshine. It's hard because it's winter here & because I work til 5pm or 6pm 5 days a week. But I want to start making sure I sit in the sun for around an hour both days every weekend & even on my half hours break atleast a couple of times a week.
I also think I might try reading & see how I go I think my concentration might be better now
 
Thanks for the indepth update 🙏please let us know how the reading goes if you end up trying it

Reading and music are two of the things I'm missing the most right now and I'm not sure of how to get the latter back faster. Losing the emotional impact I'd get from music and books (and other types of entertainment tbh) is my biggest fear at the moment so I just stopped listening music altogether and avoided reading deeper stuff to not get them ruined by the flatness I'm currently feeling
 
Also I forgot to mention I felt a bit more connected to my body the other day. It was the last day of my second period I've gotten off invega & usually when I used to get my period before invega on the last day of my period I would get this tension all through my body like I needed to release it I would stretch my body out or exercise to release the tension I believe it was my hormones adjusting. Well the other day when I was sitting at my computer desk while working I could feel those sensations again & it felt quite alright. I was stretching & even holding my body in better posture & feeling the release of the tension as I stretched & massaged my shoulders. Even stretching my arms out & twisting my body to stretch it out felt good. For the few weeks before that too before I got my period I had been feeling this kind of tension like I needed a massage for release & lymphatic drainage so I booked in & treated myself to a massage. I originally booked a lymphatic drainage massage but all she literally did was gently run her fingers over my body so I asked if she could do a remedial massage aswell so I could really get rid of the tension. I got my period again 5 days later after almost 3 months of waiting to get it again. I definitely think the massage brought it on. I want to get massages every month now.
I also want to start making sure to get as much sunshine as possible. I didn't realise but it's actually been a long time since I got sunshine. It's hard because it's winter here & because I work til 5pm or 6pm 5 days a week. But I want to start making sure I sit in the sun for around an hour both days every weekend & even on my half hours break atleast a couple of times a week.
I also think I might try reading & see how I go I think my concentration might be better now
it's good that you see improvements, in my case I don't see any but I think there must be some but it's impossible to notice. how did you manage to work, wow, didn't you feel better 1 month after your last injection? that's what happened to me 1 month after the second injection and alas I had a third one and I haven't found this feeling. How many injections have you had? I no longer remember because of this poison. I wish you and everyone a 2000% recovery.when you say you are 50% recovered is that 50% of your emotions have returned or 50% less symptoms?
 
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