☮ Social ☮ PD Social Tripping Thread: Tripping Past 2020

[Vastness]

Hmm, thanks, @Xorkoth, you might be right, maybe I didn't need to take that first dose of clonazepam this morning and could have just rode it out. I actually did take 2mg etizolam just now because, Christ, I just feel so shit today and am basically incapable of doing anything. It's the same old story of course, a vicious cycle of stuff I'm basically neglecting by my endless procrastination habits (and drug habits, arguably, although - this week being one notable exception - I always feel I've been able to kind of keep on top of the important things in my life despite flirting with several risky dependencies from time to time), that causing me guilt about being a dumb loser, letting people down, to the point of just paralysing anxiety that blocks my ability to motivate myself to do anything useful at all.

But, objectively my usage of benzos has not been that long... actually I've recorded it as meticulously as possible and over the last 10 days I've used an average of 4mg etizolam per day, and over the last 5 days an average of 3mg clonazepam / day... so, hopefully the fairly short timescale of usage is in my favour.

Most of the clonazepam, about 1 3rd of total amount consumed, was a few days ago on Monday riding out a severe anxiety attack definitely precipitated by DCK which I thought might be the onset of serotonin syndrome, although now I'm not so sure. In that instance, 5mg knocked me out finally and I woke up alive and actually in a pretty good mood... which I promptly trashed that evening by celebrating a hard day's work with - INEXPLICABLY - yet another dabble at the same substance that made me consider for I think, the first time ever in my substance using career, actually calling the emergency services and thinking I genuinely might die.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

Well, I've finally done it, developed a fucking benzo addiction.

Welcome to the club buddy, we had jackets... but we all forgot where we put them so I'll have to order up a new batch with a logo that says, "Dude, where's my bar?"

I'm tapering my use right now, .5mg per day with etizolam or alprazolam equivalencies. Went down to 9.5mg etiz yesterday, 10mg day before, 10.5 day before that. Plan on only 9mg today. Going surprisingly smoothly.

 

[Zephyn]

@Xorkoth interesting. ive had a reverse tolerance over time specifically with lysergamides. i used to accumulate pretty bad short term tolerance, but in the long run i became more sensitive. though the highest i ever dosed was 600ug LSD.

 

[AutoTripper]

yeah maybe thats why he is able to dose so high and then type on bluelight. @AutoTripper I hope you are at least using liquid LSD and putting it all the way into your rectum with an oral syringe, or soaking the blotter in water first. maybe the LSD bioavailabity isnt so good rectally either? never really heard of anyone plugging LSD until this

Just for clarity, the vast majority of my LSD is taken orally. The mega high doses. I've experimented with plugging just this year, every time its hit me like trains, more potent per ug by a margin.

It's definitely highly bioavailable rectally, and the soft wetted paper tabs just fall to shreds.

It works I promise you.


The reason my doses are so high- is because this is what I do. Always have done. I'm a crazy, mad psychonaut who goes as deep as the rope will stretch from the boat, and beyond.


Not because Im losing effects, have poor product, or any other innacurate explanation.

I just trip, very heavily, like there is only today. Is that so hard to fathom? (I don't mean that confrontatinally just makingnthe point.)

 

[Zephyn]

Nah, I guess not. I started to lose it when I went as deep with LSD as you. I may have some mild underlaying condition however. Only brought up the posting on bluelight as you said in another post that you were surprised yourself that you were still able to post on BL

 

[AutoTripper]

@Xorkoth interesting. ive had a reverse tolerance over time specifically with lysergamides. i used to accumulate pretty bad short term tolerance, but in the long run i became more sensitive. though the highest i ever dosed was 600ug LSD.

Exactly! This has been my thinking. I took 1875 ug after a 6 week break, about beginning February. Sure it was a nuts trip. But by 18 days and 7930 ug, day 17, 150 ug in 3 doses, blew me up there more than any of the other trips prior, several over 1100 ug.

I honestly can trip on 25 ug, 50 ug, even 250 is a bit too much for me on occasion recently.

I've been calling it a tolerance hack, but yes I guess it's more simple and meaningful to call it sensitisation.

 

[Zephyn]

Exactly! This has been my thinking. I took 1875 ug after a 6 week break, about beginning February. Sure it was a nuts trip. But by 18 days and 7930 ug, day 17, 150 ug in 3 doses, blew me up there more than any of the other trips prior, several over 1100 ug.

I honestly can trip on 25 ug, 50 ug, even 250 is a bit too much for me on occasion recently.

I've been calling it a tolerance hack, but yes I guess it's more simple and meaningful to call it sensitisation.

or brain damage lol (personally any long term neurological change i consider "damage" but in the case of LSD i hesitate to say that because of all the bs thats been spread regarding its use, and i think this reverse tolerance only happens with really heavy and regular use). i also noticed my trips becoming more paranoid-like over time, though i had a few traumatic experiences i think contributed to this. (though maybe this could also be due to using lower dosages and not having as much ego-dissolution to be powerful enough to overpower my anxiety)

300ug would blow my fucking head off these days. i wouldnt dare go over 150.

i cannot imagine 1875ug, arent receptors saturated at just 1mg? from what i recall this is correct and would just increase duration

 

[AutoTripper]

or brain damage lol (personally any long term neurological change i consider "damage" but in the case of LSD i hesitate to say that because of all the bs thats been spread regarding its use, and i think this reverse tolerance only happens with really heavy and regular use). i also noticed my trips becoming more paranoid-like over time, though i had a few traumatic experiences i think contributed to this. (though maybe this could also be due to using lower dosages and not having as much ego-dissolution to be powerful enough to overpower my anxiety)

300ug would blow my fucking head off these days. i wouldnt dare go over 150.

i cannot imagine 1875ug, arent receptors saturated at just 1mg? from what i recall this is correct and would just increase duration

Duration, and intensity increased, IME. So much myth still about LSD still, IMO, like it’s all so black and white.

And...300 ug...blows MY head off.Even 250 ug.

But I still can access those other deeper pockets to explore. That’s the amazing thing about LSD. It CAN be safely navigated at any dosage, even when a much lesser dose is still all the world.

Kind of crashing a bit now energy wise. Need drugs for comfort, had 30 grams kava so far, some strong Sativa which I had to put aside earlier it was bringing me up too much. I’ll see what I can make work from the medicine cabinet to get me through the day now.

I mean, 1000 ug is manageable. No way do I fancy coming up on 10,000 ug. No way can it be said that’s no more intense than 1000, in my mind.

 

[cosmic charlie]

4-HO-MET, supposed to be a 30mg dose, and I'm usually so careful, I remember weighing and re-weighing 3 times, transferring the pile of powder between containers, resetting the scale, but to this day I think in my fucked up state I might have somehow fudged it because the intensity was off the charts, hallucinations so thick it was like the air in the room became liquid.

Before that, 3-MMC or maybe 4-MMC, a fair amount of beer, ketamine, a lot of weed. Ketamine I continued to do throughout, even finished up with a bomb of 200mg MDMA on Sunday evening. My friend who I gave the same dose of Metocin to (I had texted a bunch of people to see if they wanted to come over for a party lol, but only 1 showed up, quite fortuitously in the end) did far less other drugs but was really fucked up, was basically catatonic most of Sunday but continuing to drink, smoke my weed and kept asking for more MDMA which to be honest, really started to grate after a while coz I was like when is this guy gonna fucking leave? He also threw up all over my floor, and I was torn between empathogen-induced compassion and wanting to help the guy but also a slight annoyance that he had turned out not to be great company and was basically just using my drugs and outstaying his welcome. But he did eventually leave, and I tried to get ready for Monday but I was still so fucked up and sleep was not on the cards. The other dude I actually think the trip really traumatised him because I didn't hear from him in a long time after that and don't really see him at all anymore. I should have been a more responsible tripsitter but in my defence I was already fucked up, completely disinhibited, and he was enthusiastic and outwardly displayed an unconcerned bravado about whatever drug I would suggest. But I don't think he was mentally equipped for that type of experience at that moment in time, I hope he's doing alright now whatever he's doing.

Yeah man you gotta be careful who you take on the psych binges I honestly very rarely even trip with other people for this reason. Like you I go hard with the polydrug stuff and if someone trys to dose alongside me they can sometimes lose it like your friend, it happens. The Person I tripped with most over the past years Was the ex-wife and my goodness can that woman handle her Mushrooms and was so much fun the first years we were together she actually got me back into psychs after a 5 year break I went on, not by choice mind you I was locked up in prison and a halfway house till I met her and took off to the City and changed my life and became less of a criminal and started working fulltime etc. Thankfully that habit stuck after she left and im a regular Bills paying worker bee American these days. Well anyways I actually vaped some DOiP with this dude at a Party a couple months ago and he texted me for an entire day after he left asking why it wont go away, I mean I told him its strong and lasts a longtime but I guess I should have been more cauitious about sharing that one but it was during a multiple day bender like you had on 4-AcO-DMT, Ketamine, DMT, DOiP, FentaDope and Methamphetamine ... I try to be real cautious about who I give drugs to and in general just stick to other psychonauts.

 

[Bella Figura]

One of my friends is Bi and for a little while there, every time we'd get high together things would start getting very sexual on his part. It made for some pretty uncomfortable experiences, I.E. being on acid at a show and him just grinding hard on me...and whispering in my ear to 'let it all go man' - goddamn. While a crowd of people see me just standing there totally frozen like a statue not knowing what to say or do and hoping the fucking song would end already so he'd stop rubbing his dick on my leg.

 

[Xorkoth]

Hmm, thanks, @Xorkoth, you might be right, maybe I didn't need to take that first dose of clonazepam this morning and could have just rode it out. I actually did take 2mg etizolam just now because, Christ, I just feel so shit today and am basically incapable of doing anything. It's the same old story of course, a vicious cycle of stuff I'm basically neglecting by my endless procrastination habits (and drug habits, arguably, although - this week being one notable exception - I always feel I've been able to kind of keep on top of the important things in my life despite flirting with several risky dependencies from time to time), that causing me guilt about being a dumb loser, letting people down, to the point of just paralysing anxiety that blocks my ability to motivate myself to do anything useful at all.

I know the feeling. I, too, have always been able to hold my personal life together even in the depths of drug addiction, which is mostly a blessing, but it also allows me to justify pushing further into drugs more easily. I have a tendency to prolong addiction phases even when I know I'm addicted, because I hate anxiety (who doesn't?). I feel I need to be able to perform at work and band, which is actually true, but in most cases it would have been much less suffering to just jump off early on, rather than develop something more full-blown and spend months tapering and suffering the whole time and then dealing with more protracted PAWS.

But, objectively my usage of benzos has not been that long... actually I've recorded it as meticulously as possible and over the last 10 days I've used an average of 4mg etizolam per day, and over the last 5 days an average of 3mg clonazepam / day... so, hopefully the fairly short timescale of usage is in my favour.

Yeah that's not very long. Though the clonazepam is worse to take daily than etizolam, since the half-life is much longer. Either way I think you['re probably just in for anxiety for a while, it will peak a couple of days in without any benzo usage, and will last a week give or take before starting to reduce... at least in my experience. If you can not take clonazepam and only etizolam, and wait as long as you can between doses, until you decide to jump off, that will help. And like I said if you can get some gabapentin or pregabalin, those will help a lot. Gabapentinoids are miraculous for drug withdrawals of all kinds, most especially opiates, but also benzos.

But for real, opiates... I can be very addicted to kratom and take gabapentin only for a week and barely suffer at all.

@Xorkoth interesting. ive had a reverse tolerance over time specifically with lysergamides.

I also have a reverse tolerance over time, specifically to LSD moreso than anything else. But when I was tripping multiple times a week for an extended period, I attained such a massive perma-tolerance that I could barely trip anymore. it took years and years for it to go away. Now that I trip infrequently, I am very sensitive again, in fact much more sensitive than I ever was before to LSD.

 

[cosmic charlie]

Actually bipolar exists on a spectrum, and there is even unipolar. Some people are always depressed on this spectrum (one of my oldest friends, it's horrible for him and has destroyed his life), and some people are always manic. So it's possible.
to work, and find enjoyment in things still sometimes (unlike opiate withdrawal).

This is correct not everyone bounces around Spectrum and I dont super often I've only had a few super manic periods like I described before I spend most of my time on the cusp or slightly depressed, with the help of psychedelics and or Lamictal. But occasionally I will fall into the really depressed mode and that is the absolute worst. Honestly you should be greatful that your bipolor is playing out the way it is Buzz it could be worse trust me. Some people I have met in the hospitals are always suicide or very manic and they dont live the same quality of life we get to. But trust me I know this can seem like a course but in time after you have it long enough anf learn ways to manage it just becomes...life. And that my friend is a beautiful thing and a gift. I woke up at like 1pm today, lol. About to eat some breakfast and then dose the DOiP and then hop in shower, sorta dragging ass on this rain day but ive been working hard and needed rest.

 

[Buzz Lightbeer]

This is correct not everyone bounces around Spectrum and I dont super often I've only had a few super manic periods like I described before I spend most of my time on the cusp or slightly depressed, with the help of psychedelics and or Lamictal. But occasionally I will fall into the really depressed mode and that is the absolute worst. Honestly you should be greatful that your bipolor is playing out the way it is Buzz it could be worse trust me. Some people I have met in the hospitals are always suicide or very manic and they dont live the same quality of life we get to. But trust me I know this can seem like a course but in time after you have it long enough anf learn ways to manage it just becomes...life. And that my friend is a beautiful thing and a gift. I woke up at like 1pm today, lol. About to eat some breakfast and then dose the DOiP and then hop in shower, sorta dragging ass on this rain day but ive been working hard and needed rest.

Cheers man I'm very energetic today, drank a coffee in the morning (10 hours ago) and I've been speeding around everywhere, walked around my kitchen table for close to an hour earlier, wanted to be productive today but I'm almost shaking and my mind is going so fast. In that sense MAL didn't appear to do much good.
I'll probably take a benzo at night to make sure I can sleep.
Have a good trip! How much you going for? The rain doesn't sound ideal though

 

[cosmic charlie]

Just swallowed the DOiP now probably around 20mgs maybe slightly less I had it in a one dram dropper vial and I dumped roughly half maybe slightly more. I mean after reading the thread again last night and with my tolerance to psychedelics im sure it will be fine the vial original had 35mgs inside of it I generally use 30ml aber vials for DOx but since this and the DOF are less potent I used the ones that Liquid LSD usually come in but I did like a bunch of squirts instead of drops. I really didnt wanna undershoot the mark honestly and I already tripped 3 times this past week. I take DOC indoors on the regular so im not that concerned about the stimulation being too much gonna dose my Methadone now and eat something I planned on taking this earlier in the day but I slept so damn long.

 

[Deleted member 521610]

I need to get more sleep 5-6 hours a night is catching up on me.

Getting colder each night cant wait to pick some mushrooms soon

 

[AutoTripper]

drank a coffee in the morning

I’m just doing exactly that, strong black, unsweetened. Early eve here though. Just for some energy. Had edibles just prior, fresh Sativa vaporizer next, then when compelled, a substantial amount fo kava sits ready.

Strong coffe is great though for picking up getting functional again, plus coffee is amazing at moving the bowels.

Right- vapor time.

 

[AutoTripper]

No vapor just yet, but, being abandonly nuts as you know by now...I just plugged 400 ug for a much tamer version of yesterday after my coffee perked me up nicely.

Vapor now.

 

[cosmic charlie]

Deff feel something going on a familar sorta DOx comeup a warm sorta energy Florin. Change in headspace for its slightly dissoaciating in a sense I feel pretty nice in general ate a couple blueberry waffles and gonna have some more now, stayed away from the coffee today cuz im not sure how stimulating this might get as of now its totally mangeable, stomach feels slightly off but I took 80mgs Famotidine with my 85mgs of Methadone and that should kick in and smoothen things right out. It's a nice drug so far Overall I like it have a slight headache but I need to drink a bottle of water Im probably just dehydrated. It's still very early on DOx generally take hours to peak in effects, hence me staying away from caffeine.

 

[electronDegenerate]

ever stare in the mirror on 500 ug and see what you look like in the future and then went u hit that point in the future you literally look like the vision. Its interesting how the spacetime continuum works. I find it strange now living in a point where i do not really know what comes next when i dose often its all deja vu i seen it all in high dose acid. Now its just like i see it all the previous stuff happen.

This brings me back to my ayahuasca trip. I was in a state of pure epiphany until I saw my reflection in a mirror. I saw myself at all points of my life at the same time.
Really kicked off the purge for some reason.

unique sensitivity to this particular benzo, alprazolam

I just remember Xanax leaving me with this dysphoric tiredness. Unlike etizolam which I can actually sit there and enjoy the nice feeling I have before bed,
Xanax made me painfully tired with no hope of enjoying myself.

Drinking some black coffee myself. I'm not one to struggle with addictions too much, but there would be hell to pay for me if caffeine disappeared suddenly.

 

[AutoTripper]

Deff feel something going on a familar sorta DOx comeup a warm sorta energy Florin. Change in headspace for its slightly dissoaciating in a sense I feel pretty nice in general ate a couple blueberry waffles and gonna have some more now, stayed away from the coffee today cuz im not sure how stimulating this might get as of now its totally mangeable, stomach feels slightly off but I took 80mgs Famotidine with my 85mgs of Methadone and that should kick in and smoothen things right out. It's a nice drug so far Overall I like it have a slight headache but I need to drink a bottle of water Im probably just dehydrated. It's still very early on DOx generally take hours to peak in effects, hence me staying away from caffeine.

I like a strong coffee on a real murky, heavy acid trip at least. It helps me think and remember. If I can think, I can sort shit out.

Yes definitely drink up on water. You’re surely BOUND to be dehydrated, most are chronically, with brain only running only 20% in a dehydrated state.

Good natural unrefined salt too- Redmond Real Salt is best, is vital, in sufficient, way above bullshit govt RDA’s, along with sufficient water intake, toactually facilitate any sort of proper hydration.

Swear that very recently plugged 400 ug is coming on quite heacpvy and fast to my surprise.

I thought about 500, think I made right call. 400 is plenty to plug.

Vaporizer now, then kava, maybe one crazy trip in the piepeline.

Shit, was only half hour ago too...