katykattt
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2019
- Messages
- 92
My last unhealthy/irresponsible run about 2 years ago, I experienced HELLLLAAAA psychosis. And not only psychosis but extremely delusional thoughts and reasoning. So I’ll get on with my big psychosis story now lol
So one day, I believe I had only been up for 2 days but this is when i first started messing with ice—I did extremely small amounts and only snorted it and occasionally ate it. I was not good about drinking water or forcing myself to eat, etc. no care for my body or brain whatsoever. Well I had ate a little bit the night, before and it was around 7 pm the following day. Didn’t do ANY in between...
I get a line from these people at this house (yes I was a mooch when I first started, so what), and they laid out this fat ass line of what looked like just some shake from the bottom. Well I took it to the head. Lol. I felt fine for about 10 minutes and then my body started vibrating, and getting weak and noodle-like. My jaw was jacking, my pupils looked like fuckin saucers, and I was already hitting early stages of psychosis. The rush made me extremely self-conscious of how I was acting which obviously turned into me thinking everyone was against me.
Fast forward an hour and I’m climbing on the edge of the couch in the dark because I SWORE there was people crawling and changing their hiding spots when I wasn’t looking!!! It only got worse. About 30 more minutes into it; and I was laying in a bed and very loudly and clearly heard a fuckin helicopter and soldiers/swat team land in the backyard which was right by the window near me, and they were yelling their game plan to storm the house.
At this point I was bawling, thinking I was going to prison or I was clinically insane. Across from the bed I was in was the door, and across from the was the dining room and I swear on everything I love in this world, I saw each swat team member (there was lik 20 in this dining room) holding guns with laser-sights pointed directly at me, stanced and ready to fire; at this point I was scared that if I moved they were gonna shoot. I was bawling my eyes out staying as still as possible, and I can only imagine how psychotic I looked lol. The home owners force fed me 2 Xanax to make me pass out and I thought they were trying to poison me lol.
Fast forward to the next day and I was soooo hungover from it all. And I heard voices for about 4 days after that, no meth use at all. I thought I was gonna have to be admitted. It was trippier than acid. 100%.
And guys, if your friends are obviously in a psychosis and need reassurance, just reassure them, even if what they’re seeing isn’t real. Acknowledge that you know they see that/hear that and everything’s okay. “How can I make this easier and less stressful on you?” Help somebody out.. there are people that literally go into psychosis's and kill themselves. They can be potentially dangerous if that person is alone, or doesn’t have the proper care from friends. Just a little psa!
So one day, I believe I had only been up for 2 days but this is when i first started messing with ice—I did extremely small amounts and only snorted it and occasionally ate it. I was not good about drinking water or forcing myself to eat, etc. no care for my body or brain whatsoever. Well I had ate a little bit the night, before and it was around 7 pm the following day. Didn’t do ANY in between...
I get a line from these people at this house (yes I was a mooch when I first started, so what), and they laid out this fat ass line of what looked like just some shake from the bottom. Well I took it to the head. Lol. I felt fine for about 10 minutes and then my body started vibrating, and getting weak and noodle-like. My jaw was jacking, my pupils looked like fuckin saucers, and I was already hitting early stages of psychosis. The rush made me extremely self-conscious of how I was acting which obviously turned into me thinking everyone was against me.
Fast forward an hour and I’m climbing on the edge of the couch in the dark because I SWORE there was people crawling and changing their hiding spots when I wasn’t looking!!! It only got worse. About 30 more minutes into it; and I was laying in a bed and very loudly and clearly heard a fuckin helicopter and soldiers/swat team land in the backyard which was right by the window near me, and they were yelling their game plan to storm the house.
At this point I was bawling, thinking I was going to prison or I was clinically insane. Across from the bed I was in was the door, and across from the was the dining room and I swear on everything I love in this world, I saw each swat team member (there was lik 20 in this dining room) holding guns with laser-sights pointed directly at me, stanced and ready to fire; at this point I was scared that if I moved they were gonna shoot. I was bawling my eyes out staying as still as possible, and I can only imagine how psychotic I looked lol. The home owners force fed me 2 Xanax to make me pass out and I thought they were trying to poison me lol.
Fast forward to the next day and I was soooo hungover from it all. And I heard voices for about 4 days after that, no meth use at all. I thought I was gonna have to be admitted. It was trippier than acid. 100%.
And guys, if your friends are obviously in a psychosis and need reassurance, just reassure them, even if what they’re seeing isn’t real. Acknowledge that you know they see that/hear that and everything’s okay. “How can I make this easier and less stressful on you?” Help somebody out.. there are people that literally go into psychosis's and kill themselves. They can be potentially dangerous if that person is alone, or doesn’t have the proper care from friends. Just a little psa!
lolol. The intentions are good but the delivery is just a twacked out mess and embarrassing lmao
