How come many transgender people are put off (even disturbed) by being fetishized for their bodies and think it's unacceptable for someone to want sex from them for the very reason that they're trans? I fetishize my girlfriend; she has a big butt and a beautiful face, and if she didn't, I honestly wouldn't date her... Physical attraction is 50% of a relationship. What gives some trans people the whole "Humans have been fetishized since the dawn of time, but don't fetishize me!" attitude?
Please correct me if I'm wrong on this [mention]Emptty[/mention] I'd be very interested to hear your take on these musings of mine.
Nope you're pretty much right, I've had a few relationships where I felt fetishized and the issue wasn't so much being fetishized but being fetishized for my transition. Those partners saw me as a crossdressing girl and fetishized me for that instead of seeing who I actually was. It's ok to be physically attracted to someone and see that as key to a relationship, that's ok even in relationships with a trans person. But you need to be physically attracted to them not to your idea of them.
I am curious as to what a trans individual would do if the technology and medication for gender reassignment did not exist.
So not it being illegal but just not medically possible.
Would life be managle to the OP and yes I am asking them as well as anyone else who cares to answer?
Would you have been able to come to terms with your body and find meaning, purpose, and identity in life?
I just genuinely wonder why go through all that because it hardly seems natural? It seems a rather difficult and painful path both physically and mentally.
So I am not trying to bait you but what would you have done to cope if this type of surgery and psychology didn't exist so this is a hypothetical question.
I can't speak for all trans people here, I do know plenty of trans people who choose not to physically transition and are totally fine. But in my case no, life would not be manageable without transition. When I was 15 I attempted suicide and one of my primary justifications was the belief that I would never be able to live as male.
Life might be livable for me without physical transition as long as I was still supported in living as a man and being referred to as such, but physical transition has made a significant impact on my comfort in life and I suspect I would have a much harder time with my mental health without it. It's not natural and it's not pain free but the physical pain of surgery is far more tolerable to me than the mental anguish of living a life that isn't true to myself.
If in theory I was born in a time where these physical changes were not possible I think one of two things would happen. Either I would commit suicide or I would come to terms with my identity by dressing as a man and asking that people treat me as one whenever possible. Which one would probably depend on the social climate, if the latter put me in danger or made me a social reject then the former is more likely.
Also my other query is do you feel that people must accept you as the gender you have assigned yourself instead of the biological definition as opposed to the psycological definition?
I just wonder if the fact that is such a political hot topic that some people do it for the wrong reasons such as in Iran where homosexuals are pushed into gender reassignment as homosexuality is a crime their punishable by death.
I mean I can't say what other people must do, that's not up to me. But I do think refusing to recognize my gender is incredibly disrespectful, and forcing a trans person into the box of biological sex is a form of indirect violence as it does contribute to the rhetoric that leads to transphobic violence and high suicide rates.
Ultimately people can and will label me how they want and I can't do shit to change that, it's not up to me to force people to treat me a certain way but I can at least ask that they do and if they choose to disrespect me then I know what kind of person they are and I can distance myself from them.
A person who transitions for political reasons isn't technically trans, they would still just be gay if they didn't truly identify as another gender. The act of transition doesn't make someone trans, their gender identity does.
The difference though is transexual surgery is a choice versus homosexuality not much of a choice at all.
Do you feel as though the surgery was a choice?
The surgery is something you do not have to do other than for psychological reasons? If you disagree please explain why and a reputable source from the medical community other than the whole death penalty for homosexuality as you do not identify as homosexual.
No I don't feel any aspect of my transition was a choice, it was done for psychological reason but that doesn't somehow make it a choice.
I like to think of it as equivalent to if someone were to come to me one day and say they had a surgical cure for my migraines, my migraines hurt me a lot and although I could live my life without curing them were I offered a cure it would not feel like a choice to me. I would obviously want to go through with it for the sake of no longer living in pain. Psychological pain isn't somehow less hurtful than physical pain and not transitioning left me in a place of being in a great deal of psychological pain so for me transitioning wasn't a choice it was something I had to do.
Now at what point am other people required to accept psychology over flat out science and why would be my last question?
Since when is psychology not a science? It's the study of the human mind. It definitely feels less tangible in some ways than other sciences but it is and always has been a science just like biology.
I guess I have one more. I habe noticed some people im the homosexual community not to keen on the trans being grouped in with them and I do feel in some ways it is a different struggle.
Do you feel like you have a connection to the homosexual community and why or why not?
This is probably the most complex question I've ever been asked about this and I don't mean that in a bad way, I just hope I can give a coherent answer.
First of all I personally do have a connection to the gay community as I am pansexual and have a strong preference for other men. As for whether trans people as whole do the answer is both yes and no.
The thing is trans people and gay people face some of the same struggles but also face some very different ones, straight trans people are capable of perpetuating homophobia and cis gay people are capable of perpetuating transphobia. There is a sort of divide in the communities that comes of these things happening but at the same time the community is connected through those struggles we do share.
The two are separate but also interconnected in ways that aren't deniable, trans people and gay people have been allies to one another throughout the history of the LGBT community. The foundational events for our community involved, and sometimes were even started, by transgender people. Stonewall would not have happened without transgender women.
I do not see the trans community and the gay community as being the same exact thing however the LGBT community includes both for a reason and I feel removing the T from it is disrespectful to the contributions trans people have made to every piece of it.