Heroin Pure bliss

[BeachBum4u]

Great to here Z! I sincerely wish you success with all your endeavors and hope you can kick this thing as easily as you seem to think you can. Feel free to check back in as you go along your path. We're all here for you dude. Godspeed!

 

[Zacord]

Great to here Z! I sincerely wish you success with all your endeavors and hope you can kick this thing as easily as you seem to think you can. Feel free to check back in as you go along your path. We're all here for you dude. Godspeed!

Oh, I know I can. I've done this many many times. When I was hanging out with my friend back in college, I would be on and off of H. To me this is as simple as going on a diet, I can go back to eating whenever I want. We would go downtown and score some H, and we'd do that a few times a week since downtown is right next to our college. Even after doing it for a while i wouldn't have the money for it so I just wouldn't get some. I stopped doing it for a while than the last time I scored H by myself without the help of my friend was a few months ago at work, I met this black guy at work (I call him Honorable black man. Cause I gave him 200$ and he came back to work with the H the next day, Hence he kept his word. He is officially a honorable black man.) I would do it whenever i needed a boost at work, gave me an incentive to work harder.

Drugs affect everyone differently, To me H gives me a huge boost in energy, Alot of confidence, and lots of love but at the same time i can be lazy and just do nothing, best of both worlds huh? The amount I bought from him lasted me a few months. Back than at work all i did was snort it, I never did IV alone. The only times I've ived was when i was with my friend until recently, Than yesterday i had that homeless guy help me out, and today i did it myself successfully. But, now i just won't abuse it. Honestly, i was a bit shakey at first doing it in the bathroom. Cleaned my hands, arms, used a bottle cap.. mixed it all together used a cotton as a filter, kinda fumbled with the needle a bit, and did the deed. It's definitely not something i would ever get used to. Even afterwards i didn't even feel all that great i think i didn't use enough. I was in the bathroom doing this than needed to meet my friend outside cause he just finished eating his food at the food court. It was a damn nice day though, We chilled walked around went around to different malls. I don't really like Iving all that much to be honest. After an hour or 2 i did a few small lines of h (less than 1/2 a bag of .1g) we drank a bit of rum, n some cider. I had a great day though, didn't over do it. The other mall we went to was so damn small, Costco bought out half the mall. We walked for 5 minutes to each end and were so damn disappointed had to drive over to the other 2 malls that were close by.

Glad your all helpful and kind, I know i dont have many friends and im planning on fixing that but, in the society we live in I like making intellectual friends not friends that are ignorant or stupid. I learned my lesson from back than, I know what to look for. I actually didn't finish med school due to the fact that I don't agree with the practices. How can you give someone a medication... than prescribe them another medication to counteract the side-effects of the first medication.. than prescribe them a medication for the vitamin deficiencies they are going to have because of the first medication... so on and so forth. So, What really hit me was seeing a little old lady with 40 prescriptions under her name. She had to take xanax almost every night cause she can't sleep with the amount of meds she's on. SHE needs to take a benzo to fall asleep is that no sickening? I now have a fair amount of understanding in the medical field but, I will never get myself in that hell hole.

I'm actually going back to college for mechanics, My dad was a mechanic for 20+ years when he was younger so when i go see him, I will have him teach me many things. I know your thinking... Medical school to mechanic.. right? But, It's not worth medical school. I have no debt, And college is free (thank god for financial aid) I don't want a monkey on my back telling me im evil for giving old people medicines that I don't agree with. More than 90% of the medicines behind the counter are meant to hurt / kill you. I've done plenty of research on that, and its so terrifying.
Much love

 

[consumer]

So you plan to keep using heroin eventually if you are saving what you have for a rainy day. Sounds like it already has its teeth in you to me. Good luck with it but i think you strongly underestimate the power of heroin.

 

[spacejunk]

1st post, here I go.

tread lightly man. you said in your 1st post near the end(I think) "i can quit whenever I want".. now you're getting random (semi) strangers to help you shoot up. All I can think of is that chart floating around online with a step 1-12 progression of opiate addiction. and if you use "just for fun or when depressed", well..fuckin a man, be careful. I say this because I'm a dopehead and have been for many years and this looks like a disaster. just take it easy and think about what you're doing.. ok sorry for the preaching/pep talk your posts just worried me a bit and had to say something. g'luck and godspeed

Great first post.
Opiates are really insidious, Zacord - as i'm sure you are well aware. You've already had a very close brush with death - i never had that in ~10 years of having a habit, yet i still had plenty of experiences that made me realise the "bliss" (if you can really call it that) really isn't worth it.
If one thing is definitely going to jeopardise a career in medicine, it is surely a dope habit.
No amount of lectures or prompting from people online are going to shift your thinking on this matter, but i just hope you are able to get past the mindset that heroin is something you can fuck with and not end up losing your autonomy.
The first thing that happens is you become psychologically hooked and start making excuses to yourself as to why it is ok to use.
Even it you use sporadically for years, it catches up to a lot - if not most people.

Contrary to what a lot of people seem to think, physical dependance happens pretty slowly.
But by the time you reach that point, you're in way over your head.
And even if you manage to kick a physical dependance, the psychological shit can go on for months or years afterwards.
People become hopelessly addicted for a reason, it's not just hype...
Just my 2c. Take care.

 

[Zacord]

Great first post.
Opiates are really insidious, Zacord - as i'm sure you are well aware. You've already had a very close brush with death - i never had that in ~10 years of having a habit, yet i still had plenty of experiences that made me realise the "bliss" (if you can really call it that) really isn't worth it.
If one thing is definitely going to jeopardise a career in medicine, it is surely a dope habit.
No amount of lectures or prompting from people online are going to shift your thinking on this matter, but i just hope you are able to get past the mindset that heroin is something you can fuck with and not end up losing your autonomy.
The first thing that happens is you become psychologically hooked and start making excuses to yourself as to why it is ok to use.
Even it you use sporadically for years, it catches up to a lot - if not most people.

Contrary to what a lot of people seem to think, physical dependance happens pretty slowly.
But by the time you reach that point, you're in way over your head.
And even if you manage to kick a physical dependance, the psychological shit can go on for months or years afterwards.
People become hopelessly addicted for a reason, it's not just hype...
Just my 2c. Take care.

Ill take your pennies tyvm. I know what your talking about though, Like i said in one of my replies. I had a friend that was addicted for many years, He wasn't just physiologically addicted he was physically addicted as well. He won't ever be able to kick the habit, I doubt he ever will find the will power. I will never get to that stage, I've seen how he acted when he didn't have it.. its not pretty at all. He did anything to get me to get him boi.... He's the type of person to steal your wallet and help you look for it. It took me a long time to figure out he really wasn't a good person, H changes you...You do anything to get your hand on a bag... Even steal from someone you consider a "brother".

I don't have a reason to be addicted, I was having physiological stuff going on but, I fixed it. And for me to be phyiscally addicted to something takes a long time, I remember trying to get off wax (weed) it was pretty hard as i got used to going to work, hitting my pen, and doing it every hour thereafter. That was after months of smoking wax everyday. Eventually what happened sucked balls. I'll tell you how i quit smoking wax from my pen.

One morning I woke up, threw my sheets off, Jumped out of bed, Put some clothes on, fumbled to the kitchen to eat some breakfast. Got to the kitchen and asked myself... "What is there to eat? I don't see any food, This place looks like it's been empty for weeks.." -Looks in the fridge and see's a bright light- "Ohhhhhhh look at what we have here..... Eggs, Bacon, Cheese, Even some bagels Fuck yeah". Cooked everything in 15 minutes, Eggs looked like a yellow pancake with melted cheese on top, Bacon was nice n crispy, and toasty bagel on the side. Add'd some organic honey on top of my eggs for energy. Ate it all faster than a hotdog eating champion. Took a banana, water, keys, wallet, phone, and headed out! Got to my car went to the drivers side door... tried the key... didn't work. Than I remembered "oh shit, thats right i broke the key lock for this side, I need to go to the other side and unlock it from there" I fumbled to the otherside n unlocked it. Got in my car... made it vrooommmm, and off i go. Started eating the banana, took a few puffs off my pen, finished the banana.. Threw it out the window... kept driving. Couldn't find my pen anywhere and noticed before when i threw the banana out the window I heard a "crash" So, Till this day I can only assume that my pen was thrown out with the banana. I came back several hours later and couldn't find it. Some lucky guy came by saw it picked it up n started hitting it, It was full of wax. I'm cheap, Not gonna go online n spend another 80$ for a pen. It pained me so to stopped smoking but, at that point i had no choice.

Every single day thereafter was boring as all can be. Work was beyond boring... Staring at a screen pressing enter and putting a label on a stupid box. It pissed me off so goddamn much. I'm glad they let me go from that job, Afterwards I realized I needed more education so now just going back to school for mechanics. I'm gonna be the guy fixing your car, and trying to help you out with your nutrition/ asking you what pills you take to help your health out. I'm not a doctor formally, Don't have the license to be one, Too many years and money spent for that kind of shit. But, Doesn't mean i don't have some knowledge about pharmacy and how the body works, Every pill period, Is made for you to take for long periods of time. Than after that you have to ween off of it and probably need another pill to help you do so, It makes me sick thinking about that kind of stuff. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed my little story, Have a good day! Much love.

 

[tacodude]

I don't see why everyone is being so hard on him asking a homeless man he already knew for help like homeless people are inheritly dirty & diseased deserving isolation. The homeless person might be cleaner and better health than most people here because he actually puts effort into taking care of himself just being in a bad situation vs being in a situation with a lot of support and care allowing one to not care as much about taking care of themselves. Any one of us could be homeless hell I was for a year.

As far as to the OP just be careful. Do not ever think you will not end up with an addiction because you are careful as that leads to careless use. Even one use will lead to a come down that is a minor w/d. The fact you are thinking of future use and staying prepared for it means you are already addicted. Just don't kid yourself about it and do not let it become a problem.

 

[Zacord]

I don't see why everyone is being so hard on him asking a homeless man he already knew for help like homeless people are inheritly dirty & diseased deserving isolation. The homeless person might be cleaner and better health than most people here because he actually puts effort into taking care of himself just being in a bad situation vs being in a situation with a lot of support and care allowing one to not care as much about taking care of themselves. Any one of us could be homeless hell I was for a year.

As far as to the OP just be careful. Do not ever think you will not end up with an addiction because you are careful as that leads to careless use. Even one use will lead to a come down that is a minor w/d. The fact you are thinking of future use and staying prepared for it means you are already addicted. Just don't kid yourself about it and do not let it become a problem.

I met the homeless guy before on my way to work and gave him food, got to know him a bit, i wouldn't go up to some random stranger and ask him to shoot me up. Thats stupid. Also, I won't get addicted to it but, I have to ask you a question. You have to be honest.

If you overstocked on heroin and works... What would you do with it after you quit for a while? You would do the same thing i'm doing right? keep it for a rainy day? I have 2g of h and a box full of unused needles. I'm quitting cause i don't have the phycological torment anymore and I don't feel physically addicted. I don't NEED it. But, at the same time i did spend good cold hard cash on it. I'm not gonna give it away!! I worked damn hard for my money. I tend to use every bit of it eventually.

For now, since yesturday night I haven't done any nor do i plan to for at least a week. I need to give my body some time to re-adjust to no drugs. I actually have heartburn right now n some muscle spasms cause of it, But i can deal with it. Better deal with it now than later am i right? I needed to put that out there. If you had a ton of H sitting around, But don't want to use it nor give it away... what do you do with it?

It's freezing in my room, Today's been a lazy day. I could have just walked over to my closet n gotten the stuff but, I'm stronger than that. Also, It's freezing i'd rather just stay under the covers and shiver my day away. The heartburn doesn't help but, watching tv n stuff online really does keep my mind off things. As always, You all give good advice and thank you. Have a great day, Much love.

 

[2ndblondechild]

21, you r a baby and just like myself through far too much at that age. My first advice would be to find a girl who deserves you, treats you well, keeps her word and appointments. I'm sure it's painful she's moving away, but perhaps for the best. If its meant to be she will come to recognize it, only perhaps you will find someone who appreciates you more first! As for the h, just be safe, you have had one close call as I have myself, only mine was barbiturates, from another country. Many of them and yes I was dead on arrival. I was in a coma 22 hrs and caused my loved ones lots of grief they didn't deserve. I recall that horrible feeling of waking, I wasn't sure if I was grateful to the staff or resented them at first. I came to realize I was grateful, very grateful. That was several years ago, I still use, h mostly. I too dislike the high of marijuana and uppers just make me gittery. Aside from the barbiturates I no longer can obtain, benzos and h are the only drugs I tolerate. I too feel like I can run a marathon high. Just be safe out there. I had a long time connect who recently got out and am really beginning to realize how even the same supposed product from the same street and with the same stamp can fluctuate in purity and strength.
I'm new here, as I believe you are. Its def a good place to vent and a place you know you will be understood. That can mean a lot because out in the world of work and play I assume somehow I'm alone in being fucked up, not saying I'm a bad person, just misguided. That doesn't make us unworthy. Not of our simple rights, not of friends and mostly not of love especially when you let yours be known. So just remember you are def. not alone, there are people keeping a good thought for you so keep yourself well and check in from time to time. All my best xo

 

[Zacord]

21, you r a baby and just like myself through far too much at that age. My first advice would be to find a girl who deserves you, treats you well, keeps her word and appointments. I'm sure it's painful she's moving away, but perhaps for the best. If its meant to be she will come to recognize it, only perhaps you will find someone who appreciates you more first! As for the h, just be safe, you have had one close call as I have myself, only mine was barbiturates, from another country. Many of them and yes I was dead on arrival. I was in a coma 22 hrs and caused my loved ones lots of grief they didn't deserve. I recall that horrible feeling of waking, I wasn't sure if I was grateful to the staff or resented them at first. I came to realize I was grateful, very grateful. That was several years ago, I still use, h mostly. I too dislike the high of marijuana and uppers just make me gittery. Aside from the barbiturates I no longer can obtain, benzos and h are the only drugs I tolerate. I too feel like I can run a marathon high. Just be safe out there. I had a long time connect who recently got out and am really beginning to realize how even the same supposed product from the same street and with the same stamp can fluctuate in purity and strength.
I'm new here, as I believe you are. Its def a good place to vent and a place you know you will be understood. That can mean a lot because out in the world of work and play I assume somehow I'm alone in being fucked up, not saying I'm a bad person, just misguided. That doesn't make us unworthy. Not of our simple rights, not of friends and mostly not of love especially when you let yours be known. So just remember you are def. not alone, there are people keeping a good thought for you so keep yourself well and check in from time to time. All my best xo

Yes well, She's actually much older than me... I made the mistake of getting into a relationship with an older woman(38 ) that just wanted something "casual" Which... i understand its casual but, for me it'll always be a little more than casual. She told me a weeks ago that i'm just a friend, and maybe in the future we can continue this relationship if we somehow meet up again.. But, Still that sucks. How can you expect someone with not alot of experience to just think its ok... Its pretty hard to be honest. I will try to find someone that is more of my age, But, Even that's hard to find. Someone my age that is on the same lvl? The reason i got into a relationship with her in the first place is cause we have alot of similarities. I can put a list on both sides of a piece of paper of stuff we have in common, Even though the age difference is there, It really doesn't matter in the end as long as we can get along. I'm very mature for my age, Or so i've been told. I know woman can love in different ways but, In the end no one has the same experiences. She's a fairly spiritual woman that can connect with others, she does dmt ceremonies, she's a acupuncture doctor, beautiful, talented yoga teacher, chi-kung, great dancer, very sexual, the list can go on. Point is, I'm left with these feelings while she gets to go back to her home state and do whatever she wants to do, Isn't that unfair? I'm not going to put too much thought into it but, Kinda messed up.

My close call was my pulse was 5bpm and doctor told my friend i probably wouldn't make it. The waking feeling was very strange.. After i collapsed to the ground i felt pure darkness... than i saw the light.... coming closer... than my vision was weird... i saw a bunch of people standing around me asking me if i was ok... I thought it was a nightmare... my vision was very blurry i couldnt see anyones face. they were just glad for me to be alive... eventually my vision came back but it was slow and over 10-20 minutes. i was extremely cold, I lost all my body heat. There was a homeless black man in the bed across the hall screaming about his pain, Doctor's were talking shit behind his back.. saying he's delusional and he just wants some pain medication. Very scarey day. You don't wanna OD and wake up at the hospital.

Weed just gives me panic attacks now, and any upper makes my heart beat too fast i feel like i either have to use my energy or somethings gonna "pop". Very kind words you have to offer, Thank you. I do check in everyday to this website, Ill keep this post updated on the daily always responding to replies. I hope people keep posting, Ill put up more updates n such. Much love

 

[Zacord]

To keep my post updated, I'll tell you what's been happening the past few days. Yesterday I didn't do any H. Today's been really cold in my house, and outside is hot as can be. In the beginning i was planning on not doing any but, at around 2pm i mixed some, put it in one of the works and left it on the table. Now, That's not exactly a good thing to do, I sort of regret it to be honest. I got my stuff n went to my car to do it.. It's 40 in my house... 95 outside.. how is that even possible? I gave in today, Was stupid to mix it n just leave it on the table.. wtf was i thinking. Besides that, Iving really made me feel like shit n made me think about my life. What is life? Why are people such assholes n so insensitive? Why are we born this way? etc etc. Anytime I do any drug It makes me think about topics like that. Even after doing the deed I didn't feel all that great. Idk if i didn't put enough or what? I guess I just need to use more next time. I used about a match head worth but, The purity on this specific one isn't all that great. Even after mixing with water when i put it inside the works it looked like dirty water... not the usual "brownish" color. So I can only deduce that it needs more. I'll try again in a few days, keep you all updated. Much love.

 

[tacodude]

I wasn't even attacking you and accusing you of addiction, but defending you.... The fact you felt the need to defend so much is already a sign of addiction. Seriously be careful as you are making much more effort to rationalize your choices vs if you were not an addict. I only day this for your benefit.

 

[alfredosauce]

OP you're in medical school I wouldn't fuck that up for dope.

 

[Zacord]

I wasn't even attacking you and accusing you of addiction, but defending you.... The fact you felt the need to defend so much is already a sign of addiction. Seriously be careful as you are making much more effort to rationalize your choices vs if you were not an addict. I only day this for your benefit.

I know you were defending me, I was just asking what would you do if you were stopping than, you still had a stash in your closet? I'm sorry if I came on like that, Really didn't mean it. My apologies, Much love to you brother.

[Update] The woman I've been seeing just recently contacted me. She's leaving in 2 days at 5am... She will be packing tomorrow, n probably won't be able to see her. I'm trying to take her in the morning to the airport so I can at least have a little bit of time with her before she leaves. I know it sucks, Haven't seen her in 3 weeks, Now she's all of a sudden leaving.. Can't do anything about it but, say goodbye. I just want to see her off at least, Doors are opening left n right to where shes moving, She's getting a job as a doctor... Got a place to stay... Is even able to go to the hot-springs again. Hopefully I'll be able to take her to the airport, At least I can see her one last time before she goes, That'll make my day at least.

 

[Boku_]

If i was the OP i would get tested for hepatitis C, if he has hep C organise some treatment and get his health in order. If he is negative to hep c and this sounds easier said than done throw all the needles and remaining H in your local rubbish tip and take up occasional moderate beer drinking at bars around his local area. Don't go overboard on the beer, just 3 or 4 bottle per drinking session. I know it's swapping the witch for the bitch as they say in NA but it sounds like Zacord needs something to take the edge off and numb his pain. You would be surprised how much hanging out at bars and talking to random strangers will fill the temporary void of stopping heroin use.

I know many wouldn't agree with this approach but it worked for me when i was in my early 20's and coming off a stint in a psych hospital thanks to a cannabis drug induced nervous break down . I know beer puts weight on compared to drugs but wouldn't you rather be a slightly overweight mechanic who drinks than a strung out dope fiend. If you must use heroin Zacord please try smoking it off aluminium foil it may be more wasteful but is far safer if you plan to use by yourself.

Good luck and be well

 

[Zacord]

If i was the OP i would get tested for hepatitis C, if he has hep C organise some treatment and get his health in order. If he is negative to hep c and this sounds easier said than done throw all the needles and remaining H in your local rubbish tip and take up occasional moderate beer drinking at bars around his local area. Don't go overboard on the beer, just 3 or 4 bottle per drinking session. I know it's swapping the witch for the bitch as they say in NA but it sounds like Zacord needs something to take the edge off and numb his pain. You would be surprised how much hanging out at bars and talking to random strangers will fill the temporary void of stopping heroin use.

I know many wouldn't agree with this approach but it worked for me when i was in my early 20's and coming off a stint in a psych hospital thanks to a cannabis drug induced nervous break down . I know beer puts weight on compared to drugs but wouldn't you rather be a slightly overweight mechanic who drinks than a strung out dope fiend. If you must use heroin Zacord please try smoking it off aluminium foil it may be more wasteful but is far safer if you plan to use by yourself.

Good luck and be well

This Friday I'm going for a std test. What scared the bejebus out of me was when this girl announced she had herpes when she was younger... this was AFTER I had sex with her a few times. That.. and I did stupid shit with my friend when we were hanging out. So, I will get properly checked. I do not believe I have anything as I do have absolutely amazing luck, I have a spirit following me around making sure my safety, But to be sure of that I don't have anything.. I need to get checked. She said she hasn't had a outbreak since she was very young but, I won't take that chance.She also said that, none of the men she's had sex with has caught it so.. that makes me feel better I guess? Beer doesn't agree with me, If it did i would be drinking occasionally. But, I vomited the last time I had a beer so that's a no go. I wish i could smoke pot... I had a panic attack far too many times... When I head over to my dad's house, My plan Is to take plenty of pot, wax, n other drugs to his house n have a huge party. My brother is getting out of jail due to his stupidity of running away from the cops for a year than turning himself in before thanksgiving. Hopefully he will be out in the next 2 months n he can smoke all the pot with me n my dad as possible. The only way I can smoke pot is if i smoke everyday non stop for at least a few days so my body gets use to it, My problem is I have a very low tolerance for pot. Whenever I smoke it.. it causes panic attacks (but, for some reason when i have a candy bar n some food it goes away after 20 minutes) need some time to get used to it than I can smoke. Oh, Its impossible for me to gain weight, I've tried. Beer,Malta, overeating, everything.. nothing works. My metabolism is far too high.. For some reason the only thing that i don't have a very low tolerance for is opiates. Maybe because when i used to hang out with my old friend we would do a bunch of different opiates? I'm not new to H or bars, I have a fair amount of experience with drugs in general. The only promise that could be made in this situation is that I won't overdo it. Anyway, IV makes me feel like shit whenever possible, Putting a needle in your vein? gosh... makes you feel like a junkie. At the same time though, It numbs any of the pain i'm feeling at the moment (also helps me with tests n work) Thank you for your input, If by any chance my consciousness does go to the dark side, I've prepared for such a moment. I've read up and down on this website. The chances of that happening are very slim to none as when this woman leaves/ when i do see her, my being will feel so much better. My use will be less, and more spread out. Thank you for your comment though, Much appreciated. I learn a little bit everyday by coming on here, and from reading everyone else's posts. I'm glad I've yet to run into someone that does a meaningless post on here /being a dick. Very grateful for that. Everyone that has posted on here is very kind, and that means a lot to me. Thank you again, I hope you have a great day and much love.

I will continue to update this post almost everyday/ every other day. Stay tuned!

 

[Zacord]

Since this post is on H, I thought I'd just leave this here for everyone to see. I just saw this and figured it was an interesting find.

 

[d1ahp]

21 and medical school? You sound like 12 and middle school.

Blaming some woman who has repeatedly showed you that she's not interested.

I really hope that you're just a bad troll.

 

[Zacord]

21 and medical school? You sound like 12 and middle school.

Blaming some woman who has repeatedly showed you that she's not interested.

I really hope that you're just a bad troll.

I spoke too soon, A troll has arrived. Don't comment if you know nothing, Go back and read everything first than comment. She is interested but, she's far older than me. She's also moving, nothing I can possibly do.. believe me if there was i would have done so already, my only wish is to see her one more time before she leaves. If that can be possible... that'd make me happier than i am right now. Go troll on someone else's thread.

 

[Zacord]

Hi guys, to give you an update on what's going on. Today is the last day I'm going to do H, As my tolerance has gone up in such a short amount of time, That and the the product I do have is cut too much. I have to make it last cause im not going to be buying anymore. I will stop for a few months for my receptors to heal. The girl i was with was going back to her home state, and was leaving Wednesday morning but, she said she gave herself a black eye. I don't know the all the details, she hasn't spoken to me much. All we've been doing is texting each other. All i see happening is this relationship is taking me nowhere, She's an amazing loving woman, But I don't see us together in all honesty. I love our friendship and will always treasure her. I did lose my v card to this woman.. Don't sleep around with different women. Going to just not look around for anyone. I spoke to a friend earlier.. He gave me the best advice any person could have given me. This is 100% true. If you look for someone you won't find them, But If you don't look for someone you end up meeting people at the oddest places. Like yesterday I was hanging out with a friend from school at the mall, just walking around looking at tesla cars n such. I made 2 friends. 1st one these 2 guys were in little handicap carts riding around the mall, asked them "you wanna race?", The guy ended up being a stand up comedian, we were laughing for a good hour just standing there talking with this guy. 2nd guy was a security guard, I talked to him for a bit. being a licensed security guard myself we got along talked about the job n such. Got both of these guys numbers.. Gonna go to the club where this stand up comedian jokes around n such on Monday. Gonna be a blast!

Today I went to the std clinic to get tested for everything. The doctor said I'm hiv n hep c free so im happy. Gotta wait till next week for the herpes n the rest of the tests. Only reason i'm doing this is after I had sex with this woman I've been talking about on my whole thread, She told me she had herpes when she was younger. She also said she hasn't had an outbreak since she was 16 but, I still don't take anyones word for it. I want it to say on a piece of paper that i'm clean, even though i pretty much know I am clean. Just to make sure.

I don't know if this has to do with H use but, Today around 1pm my finger was having muscle spasms. I could feel the nerve in my arm just twitching my thumb, was freaking me out alot. At around 4pm it stopped haven't paid too much attention to it since but, I thought that was fairly weird. About 6 months ago I went to a doctor n got checked for a bunch of different diseases, So im not worried but, I'm going to see if getting clean stops the twitching. It's really nasty feeling the middle of your forearm involuntarily moving your thumb... Was really creepy... That's just another incentive to get myself clean. I'll keep you all updated, Have a great day all. Much love.

 

[consumer]

Sorry mate but when a woman is interested in you they make sure they see you. None of this 3 weeks of phone and text action. You are deluding yourself about her and about the heroin. I have no doubt i will see you posting ( that is if you are still alive ) asking for help on dealing with withdrawals.

Your life but using smack because some chick didn't give you attention is pretty retarded.