poligurl
Greenlighter
I'm on day 27.5 and I can feel the pain, and I yearn for fake happiness that comes so quickly with a fix, it's in my mind so fresh. Look though, that's 0.08 years! Duration 39,847 minutes!!! I have an APP called "Quit That," and it shows minutes even! I love that! BIG help for me. Bluelight saved me through the first 14 days of 2 years of suboxone withdrawals. Far worse than any opiate withdrawal I ever went through guys! I weined down to 1mg, stocked up on immodium and benadryl and jumped off that cliff! I have now begun to stop sleeping, I've slept 2 hours in the past 6 days, and I'm pushing through! Vitamins, Netflix, and silently observing this site. I admit I have purchased some xanax on the streets! I am so ashamed, but it's not my drug of choice, I do not like them, but I'm beginning to see black dots, getting delirious here!
I MUST before I carry on ****Thank you all, and I'm not sure if this is where I post this, but you saved me from relapse during the first 14 days for SURE. Now that my profile is approved I can come back and tell you that the PAWS consist of (for me) and maybe someone can help me, and then one day someone can stumble on my post like I've done so many of yours and help someone else!
1. No interest in anything in which I just tell myself this is not real, a chemical problem, and I thank whoever my maker is for this healing feeling - instead of this sad/demotivated feeling.
2. No sleep (in which I just push through, yoga is my thing so that tends to oddly give me energy even though I do intense stand on your head type yoga! Weird!
3. Still sneezing 8 times in a row (will this end guys)??
4. Random (15 minute) bouts of the chills every other 4-5 days.... Is this in my head?
5. Then a small example of what used to be terrible bowel movements follow those, so the loose stool every other 4-5 days returns and I'm severly dehydrated again. THEN IT ENDS (please tell me I'll stop after all these days from having bathroom cleansings soon, and the chills will stop!?). OR, I coincidentally got some type of bowel food bug... It seems odd after so many days have these bowel movements.
6. HIVES! DO PEOPLE GET HIVES FROM DETOXING RANDOMLY? THEY COME AND GO!!!!!
See, the only time I detoxed before off of hard core opiates was when I tested positive for pregnancy. I detoxed just fine right away!!! 2 bad days and done! Somehow my body took it easier (even though it was 5.9 years of hard core drugs, and this time it's detoxing off long 2 years suboxone heck... far worse and stuck in system/detox was way longer - I think it's still happening - don't you? HELP!).....
A theory of mine was that pregnancy made me constipated so I didn't have the $hi*s!!!! I feel awful for taking OXIES for dental procedures after giving birth (5 months after!), which lead to 2 years of suboxone usage (worst drug ever in my opinion thus far) - I acquired it off the streets because I couldn't get help to take time off of work to detox, and I didn’t have health ins working two part time jobs - BUT, didn’t qualify for any state aid SO, I purchased buprenorphine & naloxone (Subs) 8mg strips continually
at the rate of >no prices< That hell of searching is OVER! YAY! One thing to be happy over right? But I can’t FEEL THAT HAPPY FEELING!!!!!!!! WHAT/? I KNOW IT’S something to be grateful for but I can’t FEEL grateful? I just think and think and think it!!! Pls tell me this gets better!
Thank you!
Truly,
Heather
Michigan Detoxin
I MUST before I carry on ****Thank you all, and I'm not sure if this is where I post this, but you saved me from relapse during the first 14 days for SURE. Now that my profile is approved I can come back and tell you that the PAWS consist of (for me) and maybe someone can help me, and then one day someone can stumble on my post like I've done so many of yours and help someone else!
1. No interest in anything in which I just tell myself this is not real, a chemical problem, and I thank whoever my maker is for this healing feeling - instead of this sad/demotivated feeling.
2. No sleep (in which I just push through, yoga is my thing so that tends to oddly give me energy even though I do intense stand on your head type yoga! Weird!
3. Still sneezing 8 times in a row (will this end guys)??
4. Random (15 minute) bouts of the chills every other 4-5 days.... Is this in my head?
5. Then a small example of what used to be terrible bowel movements follow those, so the loose stool every other 4-5 days returns and I'm severly dehydrated again. THEN IT ENDS (please tell me I'll stop after all these days from having bathroom cleansings soon, and the chills will stop!?). OR, I coincidentally got some type of bowel food bug... It seems odd after so many days have these bowel movements.
6. HIVES! DO PEOPLE GET HIVES FROM DETOXING RANDOMLY? THEY COME AND GO!!!!!
See, the only time I detoxed before off of hard core opiates was when I tested positive for pregnancy. I detoxed just fine right away!!! 2 bad days and done! Somehow my body took it easier (even though it was 5.9 years of hard core drugs, and this time it's detoxing off long 2 years suboxone heck... far worse and stuck in system/detox was way longer - I think it's still happening - don't you? HELP!).....
A theory of mine was that pregnancy made me constipated so I didn't have the $hi*s!!!! I feel awful for taking OXIES for dental procedures after giving birth (5 months after!), which lead to 2 years of suboxone usage (worst drug ever in my opinion thus far) - I acquired it off the streets because I couldn't get help to take time off of work to detox, and I didn’t have health ins working two part time jobs - BUT, didn’t qualify for any state aid SO, I purchased buprenorphine & naloxone (Subs) 8mg strips continually
at the rate of >no prices< That hell of searching is OVER! YAY! One thing to be happy over right? But I can’t FEEL THAT HAPPY FEELING!!!!!!!! WHAT/? I KNOW IT’S something to be grateful for but I can’t FEEL grateful? I just think and think and think it!!! Pls tell me this gets better!
Thank you!
Truly,
Heather
Michigan Detoxin
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