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Dependent on opiates.. Does it make u frustrated?

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RooBear

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Oct 1, 2014
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I have been disabled for almost 5 years after I had a 'guaranteed this will make u better' surgery on my back and 6 weeks later another one.
They have done the nerve block, in which my doc thought was my siatic. Told him something wrong, well my sympathetic and siatic nerve had switched places, he shot into sympathetic, which have me crps.
Anywho.. I HATE that I am more then likely going to have to depend on opiates, muscle relaxers, what have u for most if not all my life. I'm only 31, so I (hopefully) have a long life ahead of me, but hate that if I run out, I can't function cuz of pain.

Anyone else get frustrated that you are dependent on em, to be able to function?
 
Hell yeah.Like I've said before,it sucks to need any medication but if you're in real,true,chronic pain what else can you do to have quality of life.I'm in the same boat my friend and it's no fun.
 
Yes it makes me so frustrated. So frustrated that I am in the process of tapering and coming off for good even though I am still in a lot of pain because it's just not worth it. I feel like opiates have changed my personality, I no longer feel happy or sad. Just in limbo all the time, like an emotionless zombie. I'd rather be in constant pain than live like this anymore.
 
It makes me depressed ALOT! There was a time I was border line suicidal cuz of the pain, combo with the necessity of needing the drug to take an edge off the pain. But I have slowly gotten past that and it's not as an intense hardship on my psyche.
And I know I have said it before, but when I talked to one friend, she told me to get over it and just got off em if it bothers me so much. And that I don't 'look or seem to be in as much pain as you say'.. If only I could switch places for 1 day.. Hell, I'd even go for 1 hr! To get relief and so they understood.
I lost a lot of friends, not due to my drug use, but cuz I can't be active anymore. I used to go camping, ride atv's on the sand dunes, float the river, etc...
Now I'm the one ppl call asking if I have so and so's #, so they can invite them to do above activities.
I try the best I can and that's all I can ask of myself.
My daughter started in a hip hop class a few weeks ago. Her teachers r so awesome, they know I used to be a dancer. So now they ask me to come in during adult hip hop classes to help and give advice. They understand my condition and tell me to go at my speed ect. It is a kick ass feeling!!!!
 
And I'm no longer a greeny on here!!! Wahoo!!! ;)
It's the simple things in life I look for to give me reminders to smile ;)
 
I'm contemplating going to pain management dr myself for my neck injury.. Only thing that blows is that I'm a youngin' and they want me on fucking Ultram. Just want some Morphine for when life sucks.
 
Have u ever been prescribed it before? When they prescribe me something, I try to connect it to something I've been prescribed and think of side effects as to get what I'm hoping for
 
Being dependent on anything besides food, water, and shelter sucks ass in my most honest opinion
 
I second that ^^^^^
It's just nice finally finding a place with ppl who can relate to some things I go thru and won't judge due to my age..
When I have tried to talk to ppl in the past, they say 'that totally kicks ass u get that high of a dosage'. OR my fav 'you are not in that much pain, come on, ur on 31, I'll bounce back'
 
I am frustrated I am dependant on lyrica because of the side effects. It was the same with benzos. Opiates never really bothered me, the main side effects they had was making me annoyed and sweaty. I could cope with that, however benzos and other GABAergics slowly feel like they drain the life out of me.
 
I hate how sometimes gabapentin will work both with nerves and my head, then other times, I feel like a fucking zombie with no relief!!
 
That's weird.I hear all the time about people taking gabapentin and it has never done a thing to me.The only thing I've ever noticed from it is that sometimes if I take a high enough dose of it with benzos it makes me slightly drowsy.I've heard others compare it to a Soma type feeling but I just don't get it.Sucks cuz I have a shit load of it on my dresser and have no use for it.Someone gave me the stuff thinking it would help my insomnia but nope.
 
I've heard it can be a shoot and miss with GABA. The first time made all my symptoms worse but now it works.
I've also known ppl who become suicidal on it.. Ur not missing out on anything in the least bit, from my experience.
 
I do miss the ability to just go wherever I feel like and not have to worry about getting well.

I remember a trip I took with 2 friends, we brought 2 bricks (100 bags)with us on a trip to NH from southern NJ. We were supposed to stay for atleast 3 or 4 days. We ended up running out the night we got there. We left the next morning, and I drove the whole way home without stopping so we could see our connect back home.
 
I didn't really mind being physically dependent on opium poppies because there was a steady, cheap supply. It was only when I ran out that it became not worth it. If I knew I'd have a lifetime supply, I'd gladly take opiates every day until I died.

It is kinda annoying having to think about taking your meds with you wherever you go, picking them up from the pharmacy, etc. But I'd prefer that to living in the hell of treatment-resistant depression. Being a "slave" to a drug is never good.
 
lazylazyjoe said:
I do miss the ability to just go wherever I feel like and not have to worry about getting well.

I remember a trip I took with 2 friends, we brought 2 bricks (100 bags)with us on a trip to NH from southern NJ. We were supposed to stay for atleast 3 or 4 days. We ended up running out the night we got there. We left the next morning, and I drove the whole way home without stopping so we could see our connect back home.
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^^I hear you man,what a heartache this is.

After years of staying constantly in the city,my (non drug user) gf and i decided to go to a 7-8 day vacation on the countryside last summer,i had to pack dozens of grams and a box of pills to take with me to stay ok.After 6 days,i run out of dope and we had to leave early.It was so beautiful and peaceful there and we had such a blast but dopefiend idiot cant even stay a week without being close to his connection(s).
 
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